26/11/2024
This is so timely. Mental health amongst equine professionals is such an important topic. This industry can absolutely crush you if you donโt take care of yourself.
An old post worth resharing -
Mental health for equine professionals -
Over the past year, I have been working hard on my own mental health. I know some of my readers are equine professionals also, so I thought Iโd share. Even if you arenโt, these might help you too.
-I make myself rules about my posts. I write about what I think is important to share, understanding some people may misinterpret my intent, mix up my words or get upset and flat out disagree. I make myself a rule to limit time reading and answering comments, and donโt allow myself to read comments outside of my own page on my posts. If it gets shared, the comments are none of my business. I sometimes slip up on this, but my rule of thumb is that other peoples comments are not personal, and not important enough to put a cloud over my mindset while I ride other peopleโs horses through my day. And I try to remember, when you throw a stone at a pack of dogs, the one that yelps is the one you hit. In other words, angry comments usually come from a person who feels defensive.
-itโs ok to be disliked. Get comfortable with it. Being a people pleaser will only lead you to feel bad, and cheapen your work. You donโt have to be rude to people, and you can be polite to everyone. But some people wonโt like your work, and thatโs ok. There are plenty of other people who will love your work and love who you are and what you bring to the horse.
-set good and firm boundaries with yourself, your time, and others. Make very clear what you expect and you will find yourself surrounded by clients and people who respect you.
-itโs my job to educate, but it isnโt my job to save everyone. I make time to write and answer questions the best of my ability, but it isnโt my job to give up my day to answering questions about horses and riders I canโt see. My responsibility is to the horses in my care first- itโs important to remember if people really need help and value your time, they will respect you and your time and seek help through the proper avenues.
-itโs ok to be vulnerable. Just because you donโt see many big names admitting to stress, fear, struggle, uncertainty etc, doesnโt mean they donโt have it. I truly believe the industry is changing, and every vulnerable and authentic interaction we have helps change the tide.
-donโt forget what it felt like to have no idea. Most of us have been doing this so long, we forget what itโs like to feel totally inadequate, unsure, uneducated, or dependent on a trainer. I think itโs incredibly healthy to put ourselves in similar scenarios often- take up a new skill that you are a little afraid of - itโs a great reminder that we all want kind treatment, things explained clearly, time to learn, and no judgement about our shaky ability while we learn.
-we do this for love of the horse, but We need to feed ourselves and our horses. Giving away your services, giving endless discounts, giving away time etc leads to burnout, resentment and loss of passion. Horses are a luxury item-they are expensive to maintain. Your farrier, vet, hay supplier and bank wonโt give you discounts or trades- you still need to pay them. Charge for your services - then if you decide to give time for free, it will be truly from the goodness of your heart and not obligation and resentment.
-donโt forget to take time out for yourself, your family, and your own horses. Other peoples horses will come and go, and you ultimately have no control over how they are handled. It might break your heart to watch your training horses go in directions you didnโt think was best for their well-being - but developing your own horses as partners is something you have complete control over, and a piece of artwork you can call all your own. Donโt forget about your own life.