Earth Song Mama (2025)

15/04/2025

Lately I’ve found so much gratitude for the challenges I’ve experienced in the last six years of my life. I feel now that these challenges were preparing me for this moment of our lives.

Since Juniper was born I’ve learned so many lessons on love, heart-ache, healing, grief, and trauma- and these are all things that I’ve needed to draw from during this hard time.

In the past it has been hard to be a mother to Juniper because of her strong will. But now- Juniper’s strength, sass, and fierce determination are the traits she has most-needed during this incomprehensibly hard moment of her life. I honestly think these aspects of her character have saved her life.

Through immense suffering, a dance with death, and a loss of her physical capacities, she has perservered. There are tears, there is panic, there is pain, there is sadness- but through it all, there is incredible determination and inner strength that is helping her through each day.

The doctors still don’t know what happened to her and the best diagnosis they have (besides her initial diagnosis of OTC deficiency) is that her body suffered “brain damage”. No one can tell us how long her healing journey will be or what her capacity will be at the end of it- which is a gift because I don’t need anyone telling my kid what she is or isn’t capable of.

Whatever comes, she will handle it.

Right now Juniper puts in so much effort simply to raise her hand, make a sound, or swallow a sip of water… she inspires me to tears every day with her efforts.

And then there is sweet baby Koda, who I had no intention of raising as a single mom- and weirdly I couldn’t have done this without her under any other circumstance. The way she depends on me so completely is incredibly helpful for keeping me grounded at the end of each day. Also she makes me (and everyone at the hospital) smile- and what a gift this is during dark and hard moments.

Thank you Juniper and Koda for bringing me on the ride of my life, and allowing me to witness daily miracles through you both.

And thank you all for the prayers and love, which continue to give us strength to carry on through this difficult time.

💗Bethany

04/04/2025

I debated whether or not to share a photo of my daughter yesterday but I bet she would prefer (as we all might) not to be shown at her worst, so here’s a photo from a few months back when I was snuggling both girls.

Juniper continues to be a little mystery baffling all the doctors after 3 MRIs in one week and constant EEG monitoring they can seem to find a reason for her seizures. The most important thing is that she’s responding now.

My mom wrote a great update, here’s a part of it:

“Juniper is now fully conscious and following simple instructions to lift her arms and legs, or roll to the side. She is attempting to speak but unable to form words. She is less agitated and was able to watch small snippets of a movie and laugh at the appropriate times. Juniper enjoyed a visit from her great grandparents and was able to raise her arm in greeting when they arrived. She lifted and extended two arms to show them she wanted to give hugs. She laughed when Opa complimented her on her new front teeth, then loosened his dentures to show her his new teeth. These steps forward seem small in comparison to the rehabilitation she needs to to be healthy, to eat, speak, and use her limbs again but they are huge in comparison to where we were a few days ago. We thank you for your continued prayers for Juniper”. 💗🙏

03/04/2025

Little love
I haven’t heard you speak for days, you can’t squeeze my hand, but I can feel you.

I know you’re frustrated with all the tests and medicines the many people coming in and out of your room, and all the wires and tubes attached to your body. I know you want to be home, away from all this. I want that too.

I can feel when you settle and when the love flowing from those around you is bringing you peace.

I sense that for a few days you were not sure about being here on earth but now you have decided to stay. I can’t tell you how I know this, but I feel you getting a little bit stronger even as your body continues to shake.

It’s really painful and uncomfortable to be you right now. Your little body is fighting so hard. You are scared. We all are. But you are also comforted by the love coming your way.

You’re amazing sweet one. Keep going. We love you. We will keep loving you. Maybe I’m just a crazy mom but you don’t have to speak to communicate with me. I’m here. I feel you. You’re not alone. I love you. 💗

31/03/2025

Hi friends,
Right now Juniper is in the ICU and she needs all of our love and prayers.

She was admitted to the hospital 2 weeks ago after 6 months of bizarre symptoms and years of sleep and behavioural issues.

At the hospital (Mac Kids) she was diagnosed with OTC deficiency, a rare metabolic disorder causing her to be unable to digest protein easily. This disorder causes a build up of ammonia in the body and brain due to an inability to process it in the liver. Interestingly, she has not wanted to eat protein for a long time and we were continually sneaking it into her meals, thinking we needed it to help nourish her… (yet another reminder to trust your kids’ inner knowing!)

Things were going well with treatment, but then she developed tremors or seizures which, over the course of the week, spread to her whole body. She is currently unable to speak, walk, eat, drink, be comfortable, or communicate at this time.

Please please pray for her full healing and recovery.

Pray for me and all her loved ones as we hold her, advocate for her, tune into her, and love her through all of this.

I gave birth to a little warrior and I’m so grateful in this moment for her fire and determination. I have no doubt her fierce spirit will help her through this.

May this moment of suffering and hardship be in service to something greater.

(this picture was from before tremors started when she came outside to feel sun on her face for the first time in a while🥰) 🙏💗

17/03/2025

Hi Friends, thank for all the love and prayers for my daughter who is in McMaster Children’s hospital at the moment, after 5 months of strange health difficulties, and 2 years of difficulty. We are finally getting the care our little girl needs and we are so grateful.

I was going to do album promo today but now all I can think about is my girl. I found these two sweet videos of her from 3 years ago.

May she return to her s***k and health of year’s past, and may we find some restored ease + peace in our little life after many hard times.

Thank you also to all those who have purchased my album so far!! Making income as a single mom of a baby and an older child who has been needing extra care has not been easy this winter. I’d love if you bought my new album to show your support for my music and my little family!

Thank you 🙏 ⭐️💗

06/03/2025

I am teaming up with some amazing women to run self-care workshops for the Nourished Mama Garden Club this summer.

I’ll be announcing these workshops over the next few weeks! My favourite grey county yoga instructor Jessie Powell .it.be.yoga.with.jess will be joining us and offering this great workshop:

Embodied Yoga Workshop

Join Yoga Guide and Gardening Mama Jessie Powell for a 2 hour Embodied Yoga Workshop.

This nourishing workshop will explore Myofasical Release techniques using therapy balls and gentle yoga movement. Jessie will guide you through a deep dive into the tissues of the fascia, which encase your whole internal system.

Combined with beginner yoga movement, you will discover a new level of embodiment and full body nourishment. After long hours tending your gardens and carrying your little ones, the techniques you will learn, will help untangle the tensions holding throughout your body.

The benefits of this practice include:

Reducing muscle tension
Restoring range of motion
Promoting the relaxation response
Improving body awareness
Please bring your own yoga mat, blanket, water bottle and any other yoga props you like to bring for your practice.

You will receive a set of therapy balls to use for the workshop and to keep, so you can continue to support your wellness journey. 🌱💗🌸

For more info on the Nourished Mama Garden Club check out the link in my profile 💗

04/03/2025

Hi friends!

Over the past 20 years, my journey has been anything but ordinary. I dropped out of university due to illness, and discovered the healing power of nature, organic farming, and eating whole foods.

I’ve had the privilege of running a community farm, living close to nature, and learning to care for my body naturally.

Along the way, I’ve faced many challenges including chronic illness, sexual assault, miscarriage, divorce, abortion, and single motherhood.

My survival and resilience are thanks to the amazing women in my life. I understand the difficulty of building community in an individualist culture and the importance of asking for help. I believe we must support one another, honor the land, and heal together.

As long as I have my home + land, I want to share it with women who are healing or in need of community. If you or someone you know is seeking a peaceful life on the land, I’d love to connect!

I have 2 beautiful housing options on my 9-acre property, nestled near the beautiful Saugeen River in Durham, Ontario. I need help in the gardens, with my children, in the home, and with running women’s circles and programs!

Reach out if you’re interested! 💗🌱🌸

03/03/2025

It has been a week.

I am working on getting a diagnoses for my oldest girl after 1.5 years of significant challenges and 4 months of intense health symptoms. She was rarely sick in her life up until now.

I don’t want to share too much except that I’ve never mothered so dang hard.

So many snuggles and hugs for these girls, day and night.

So much digging and protecting and advocating and praying and grieving and wishing and hoping…

I’ve known something deeper was up with my girl for a while even though no one else could see it… and this week I asked myself why… why did I ever doubt myself?

Remember to trust your mama heart my friends. Because
1. a mama knows.
2. your kids are good kids, no matter what anybody says.
3. The body doesn’t make mistakes.

Trust your kids and try to understand what their bodies/behaviours are telling you. It’s far from easy, (in fact this may just be the hardest thing I’ve ever done.).

it’s worth it.
💗💗💗

12/02/2025

The Nourished Mama Garden club is a group of 10-15 mothers who gather monthly through the summer and receive the equivalent of a CSA share from a beautiful garden that is planned + grown just for you!

Monthly Gathering days run from 10am-4pm. They include self-care activities run by myself (and various other facilitators), outdoor programming for little ones, organic garden education, a nourishing farm-to-table meal, community building, and more! There is also the option of camping overnight for those looking for more time on the land with their kids.

The veggie garden will be tended by myself and volunteers, and will be available for additional harvest during non-gathering weeks. For those who live a bit further from the garden there will be a once-monthly drop-off of veggies in Guelph/Elora.

This club is a bit like being in a CSA, but you also receive nourishment of the heart and soul and you + your children will be connected to the land!

Please reach out if you’d like to learn more and join the program!

21/01/2025

Hi friends, I’m inching towards the finish line with my new music album and wanted to share this beautiful cover with art from and some words.💗

The title song of this album is called Red Tailed Hawk and it is about the harrowing moment of my life when I began considering that I might be coming to the end of my marriage and ten year relationship. This moment (and this song written in the middle of the night) changed my life drastically for both better and worse.

This album is about perseverance, cultivating passion and freedom from within, and following the call into the wilderness of one’s own life. It took me a long time to birth this album and even now- between trying to build a business, keep a home, and raise two kids - getting this album out has been a labour of love!

Huge thanks to .schwartz my amazing producer and to both .schwartz and for their beautiful musical additions to the album. If you find yourself wanting to work with the pros, I highly recommend them both.

I hope you enjoy and stay tuned!

20/01/2025

What a joyous day!

I made a frame drum yesterday. I learned about drums, about how the frame drum is common across many cultures and how women were the predominant makers and users of these kinds of drums.

I learned that the deer and tree live on in the drum, and that drums become more healing the more they are played and loved. I learned some simple songs, how to pray with the drum, and how to send healing to others with the drum.

My baby basked in the joy and energy of everyone in the room and in the sounds of drums. She napped by the wood stove, crawled at our feet, and wiggled on my back as I worked on my drum. I was assisted by others to keep up with creating while I nursed and chased my babe.

I can’t say for sure but my fingers seemed to remember creating a drum before, in another lifetime or perhaps my ancestors were coming to assist me.

The drum will dry for another day and then we will take it to the river to play… thank you for being a great teacher, we love our drum 🥰🥳.

13/01/2025

A mentor of mine once said, “anything you’ve manifested, you can manifest again!”

When I left my old farm I thought that maybe I’d never create anything quite as beautiful as I had before, and at that time I felt discouraged that everything beautiful we had built was “gone.”

But this mentor taught me that what you lose -it lives on within you, and anything you create is building upon what you have created before.

I see this now. It’s not all that hard to make ideas come to fruition- you just have to commit to doing the work it takes to bring things into reality.

Sometimes the harder part is believing it can be done, and that it can be as beautiful as you imagine it can be.

Sharing some sweet photos today to remember some sweet times at my old farm - and prepare for new garden dreams ahead.

You can now Sign up for the Nourished Mamas Garden Club (See link in my stories for full program details).

If you sign up before February 14 you will receive a free copy of my Online 5 week Organic Gardening Course (The Grounded Gardening Course). 🌱🥬

08/01/2025

Hey friends,

This spring and summer I will start my first in-person program bringing mothers together on land - to tend our hearts, to tend our bodies, to tend the land, to tend our children, and to create the village culture many of us mothers deeply crave.

I’m calling it “The Nourished Mamas Garden Club”.

This has been a dream of mine for the last 5 years and it’s time I make it happen. Together we will grieve, dance, sing, stretch, play, laugh, learn, share our hearts, get our hands dirty, tend to our bodies, swim in the river, and invite our children into meaningful connection with the land and garden. ☀️

If you’d like to join, send me a message with your email and I’ll send you the registration form.

If you’d like to support the scholarship fund please donate by e-transfer to [email protected] or purchase my online Grounded Gardening Course (will post more about this soon!)

Please share with any moms who you think might be interested.

I can’t wait to meet you in the garden! 🙏💗🥬☀️🌺

Bethany

07/01/2025

Part 2/2

Donations and volunteers to assist in garden maintenance or other aspects of the program are needed. We need child-care providers, cooks for retreat days, seeds, seedlings, garden-waterers (when I’m not home), organic compost + mulch, greenhouse space, and more!

Please message me with your email address, phone number, + what you may want to offer to help me start this program. I will reach out to discuss. Anyone can help!

If you’d like to donate directly to the scholarship program for The Nourished Mamas Garden Club you can send an e-transfers to me at [email protected].

If you’d like to buy my Grounded Gardening online course, send an e-transfer of $150 to my email [email protected] and send me an email with your full name, phone number, and email address. Course will be delivered to your email on Feb. 1st (videos are pre-recorded).

For more information on the course or the Nourished Mama Garden Program, stay tuned- I’ll be posting more about it in the next few days.

Thanks friends 🥬💗

07/01/2025

Part 1/2

Hey friends,

I need your help!

This month I will be collecting donations and selling my Grounded Gardening online course as a fund-raiser for a new program I will be running this year on my land called “The Nourished Mama Garden Club”.

My Grounded Gardener online course is a 5 week (or self-paced) deep dive into growing an organic garden, which includes 5 2-hour videos, an e-book to accompany the videos, and an online forum to ask gardening questions.

In the course I share many tips and tricks learned during my decade of running an organic farm, as well as grounding exercises to help soothe your nervous system and “tune in” to the natural world around you.

This year 90% of the proceeds from the online course sales will be going to fund scholarships for my new program, the “Nourished Mama Garden Club”.

What is “The Nourished Mama Garden Club”, you ask?

The Nourished Mama Garden Club is an in-person, 5 month program for hard-working moms who want to connect with land, tend their hearts, and gather in community.

We will meet for 5 retreat days through the season. These retreat days will include food, childcare, and programming to nourish the hearts, bodies, and souls of hard-working single mamas.

We will do yoga + self-tending practices, connect with plants, get our hands dirty in the garden, swim in the river, have sharing circles around campfires, and more! Moms will go home from each visit with a bounty of organic food from the garden.

Additionally participants in the program can come on drop-in days to tend the garden, harvest produce, and treat the garden/land as “their own” - camping out, playing with their kids, harvesting, and more. This program is for anyone who is about 2 hours or closer to my land in Durham, Ontario. (Scholarships will be prioritized for Single Mamas 💗.)

Over the next few days I’ll be posting more information about the Grounded Gardening Course and the Nourished Mama Garden Club.

If you can help me by sharing widely this information, I would much appreciate it! If you want to support or sign up right now, please do- my next post will tell you how to get involved!

Thanks friends🙏 🥬💗

17/11/2024

Time for my quarterly Facebook update...

Hey friends!
I recently became a single mom of my babe. This happened by choice and by circumstance. My partner decided to move permanently back to his home country after deciding that he cannot thrive in Canada, and invited me to join him.
We’ve both struggled a lot in our relationship, and I have an older daughter I don’t wish to abandon- so I chose to stay here and we split up.

Being a single mother of another kiddo is far from what I had as my life plan, but I'm rolling with it as best I can.
Overall, I have been unravelling lately. I didn’t think I would as I was feeling quite solid about this shift but my 6yo. got very sick and has stayed sick for a while, so I’ve started to get burnt out. Every ounce of me has been going to my children and there hasn’t been much leftover.

Having time to oneself to grieve and rage and process a break up is vital and wow- is this ever hard as a mom.
Crying on the phone with a wise friend I asked, “how can I move through the resentment I’m feeling?”
She told me that resentment comes when we feel we have given too much.

This idea has been helping me a lot in two ways: first to set firmer boundaries where needed, and second to take self-responsibility for having given more than I should have in certain moments, leading to some of the disappointments and frustrations I feel.
I’m still a work-in-progress on that one but overall I’ve realized that there is something very useful and clarifying about hard times. While the things that arise can feel acutely awful, the gift of this time is the gift of life assessment; Where am I? How did I get here? What do I want to do differently moving forward?
There’s a part of me that wants to just become a hot mess. There’s something appealing about it, some form of release when I think of just doing nothing and letting all this sorrow and rage overtake me.

I’m not going to do that at the moment, but instead I’ll write more, make some poetry and songs to move through this time and find my feet in my journey as a single mom of two beautiful daughters.

If you care to be a witness to this part-unravelling/part-unfurling, I’ll be sharing mostly on instagram.
💗🌟🌈
Bethany

Earth Song Mama

15/04/2025

04/04/2025

03/04/2025

31/03/2025

17/03/2025

06/03/2025

04/03/2025

03/03/2025

12/02/2025

21/01/2025

20/01/2025

13/01/2025

08/01/2025

07/01/2025

07/01/2025

17/11/2024

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