06/04/2025
Advocating for Vibe – The Importance of Consent and Choice in Dog Socialisation
At Fort K9, we believe that proper socialisation isn’t about overwhelming dogs with experiences, it’s about giving them the space and support to process the world at their own pace. Recently, during a trip into town with Vibe for one of her environmental and socialisation training sessions, we encountered a situation that perfectly illustrates why this approach is so important.
The Goal: Calm Exposure, Not Forced Interaction
The aim of our visit was simple: to build Vibe’s confidence in a brand-new environment. Town life brings a lot of novelty, cars, people, noises, and of course, other dogs. The goal wasn’t for Vibe to interact with everyone and everything we came across, but to observe, absorb, and settle in the presence of these new stimuli without pressure. She was doing brilliantly watching the world go by, relaxed, comfortable, and curious from an appropriate distance.
And then came the situation that could have derailed all that progress.
What Happened
As we were standing calmly outside of a supermarket , a man approached with his dog. Instead of passing by or giving us space, he deliberately steered his dog towards Vibe and said those infamous words: “Be nice.”
Now, let’s unpack that for a moment.
If someone feels the need to tell their dog to be nice, there’s a good chance they already know their dog might not be. Which begs the question why put your dog, and someone else’s, in a situation they’re not equipped to handle?
Dogs Deserve Consent, Too
The bigger picture here isn’t just about this man and his dog, it’s about a culture of forcing interactions under the guise of socialisation.
Think about it like this: as humans, we don’t walk up to strangers on the street and hug them. In fact, doing so would probably earn us a well-deserved smack. As parents, we don’t drag our children around the supermarket making them shake hands with every stranger. So why do we think it’s okay to do this to our dogs?
Dogs, just like us, deserve the right to choose whether or not they want to engage. Forcing them into unwanted interactions can create lasting stress, break trust with their handler, and in many cases spark reactivity where there once was none.
How I Handled It
The moment I heard the man say “be nice,” I knew I had to act fast.
First, I calmly and quickly removed Vibe from the situation. She was already managing town life beautifully, observing people and dogs from a distance she was comfortable with. The last thing I wanted was for her to have a negative encounter with a potentially reactive dog.
More importantly, it’s my job to advocate for her. I am her guide, her security blanket, and her voice when she can’t speak for herself. If I allow her to be forced into uncomfortable situations, I risk breaking the trust we’ve spent months building. And that trust is everything.
The Role of the handler: Creating Safe Experiences
When we push dogs into situations they aren’t ready for whether it’s greeting a stranger, playing with an unfamiliar dog, or walking in a crowded area. We teach them one thing: their feelings don’t matter. And when they feel unsafe, they’ll find their own ways to communicate it often through barking, lunging, or shutting down entirely.
That’s how reactivity develops.
Instead, we must flip the narrative. Give dogs the choice to engage or disengage. Give them the time to observe, learn, and adapt. Allow them to grow confident not because they were forced into the world, but because they chose to step into it, knowing we’ve got their back.
What This Teaches Us
This situation wasn’t just a near-miss—it was a reminder of why we do what we do at Fort K9. Socialisation is not about flooding a young dog with experiences, it’s about guiding them through new things with respect, care, and the freedom to choose.
With Vibe, my priority is to let her explore life at her own pace, to build her confidence slowly, and to assess situations in real-time to ensure they’re safe. That way, she learns that the world isn’t something to fear and more importantly, that I’ll always advocate for her wellbeing.
Because trust isn’t just earned—it’s protected, moment by moment.
Final Thoughts
If there’s one takeaway here, it’s this: consent matters. Advocacy matters. And socialisation should never come at the cost of a dog’s emotional safety.
So next time you’re out with your dog and someone tries to bring theirs too close don’t be afraid to speak up, step away, or say “no thanks.” You are your dog’s voice. Use it.
Stay tuned for more training insights and real-life learning moments over Patreon at Fort K9 Training. And as always Happy training.
Dog training is more than just obedience it’s about building a strong bond and supporting the well-being of both dog and owner.
