28/02/2022
My dogs are not trained purely positively. I tell them no. I correct them if they are rude. I reward them when they do right. Funnily enough, my husband hasn’t been trained purely positively either. I correct him when he is rude. I thank him when he does kind things. And he isn’t aggressive. Despite the study out there saying he must be because corrections cause aggression. Yet, neither are my dogs.
Have we lowered standards as to how we think people should be treated? Or have we just gotten softer and kinder, never wanting our dogs to have a bad moment? Or is it both? We don’t want our dogs to have a bad moment, and as a result, we lowered our expectation of how others should be treated?
Who knows what caused what, but positive reinforcement training fits all of our own emotional criteria to be kinder and not cause stress or discomfort. We have been told that we can train everything that we want this way, and remove all obnoxious habits in our dogs with positive reinforcement alone. I wish it was this simple. If we have a dog that when off-leash chases rabbits and deer, positive reinforcement will not fix it. Corrections will, but positive reinforcement alone will not. If we have a dog rudely leaping on people, positive reinforcement won't fix it. Granted, never say never. There are brilliant positive reinforcement trainers who will be able to achieve this. But most won’t.
And this partly explains why we are losing our dog privileges. We've put aside common sense when it comes to telling our dogs when they are being rude and intolerable. Instead, we have become so kind and tolerant, with endless worry about doing no harm or causing stress. We want to reward all badness away.
My dogs are raised with the same guidelines that I have in all the other relationships in my life. We communicate. There is give and take. There is a whole lot of fun, but there are also consequences if you cross the line. Our life is in harmony, in balance, and so is our training.
Once i read a little saying. “Humans are like tea bags. You do not know how strong they are until you steep them in hot water”. I believe this to be true. And, I do not worry about causing stress in my dogs as I know that dealing it make my dog a more rounded person. Stress is not to be avoided. It is to be embraced.
I expect my dogs to behave. And they do. Expect the same of your own. Here is permission to give your dog clear boundaries again, even though they may cause stress. A fair correction on his leash for being rude won't make him aggressive, I promise. And if he is so out of control that he wants to discipline you for that, then consider that your invite to discuss "teeth are forbidden to touch human skin".
We would never allow family members to be as rude as we allow our dogs to be. Nor do we give them rewards once they are nicer. Start applying those same principles to your dog. Keep your rewards when learning ,or deserved. Add in corrections for lack of effort, or rudeness. The same as you do in your human-life.
Dog training is not as complex as we've made it. Just be clear. And always fair. And honour your dog by not raising him to be a self-indulged jerk.
Monique Anstee
The Naughty Dogge
Author of As a Dog Thinketh