08/08/2026
A different type of post today. I generally don't talk about specifics of my disability. Mostly because I absolutely detest any type of pity, or that "oh you've achieved so much in spite of it all" attitude.
But I'm tired and angry.
This week I have seen multiple major news outlets run the most disgusting ablist nonsense. So today we're talking about mobility aids.
This is my experience. But I am neither special nor unique. I do not have more pain than those around me. I actually often have less. But in response to the ridiculous narrative I've seen this week-
I am an ambulatory wheelchair user. This means I do not use my wheelchair for everything everyday.
I use my wheelchair when I need it.
Firstly it's a manual chair, that means that I am still moving myself, it's just that I'm using my arms not my legs. It still uses energy to move your arms.
Before I had a chair I had more days when I couldn't leave the house.
I have the conditions that were described in the Telegraph article the other day. The ones that were implied to be just a bit of fun, or totally "normal things for young women".
The way that this effects me in relation to using my chair is that, sometimes I know I am more likely to loose consciousness. (Which by the way, is not fun in public places.) One of the things that triggers this is changing position, or standing still for more than 10 seconds. So sitting down can mitigate some of that (along with my medical alert dog). I am also prone to internal bleeding, so the biggest risk to fainting is hitting my head. The chair helps with this as I just slump forward. (The dog is the main disability aid here still, as she's preventing it from getting to the worst of this. Pre medical alert dog I was fully loosing consciousness around once a week, and higher in the summer when it's hot. Now as long as she can be there I have an early warning system, so I can take steps to prevent fully passing out. Unfortunately not all environments are physically safe for assistance dogs, and also dogs can get ill/need time off.
Another reason I choose to use my chair is pain. I have a condition called hEDS (I can't remember if that was made fun of in that telegraph article, but it sounded like it probably fit the narrative of "attention seeker disease").
The main way in which this plays into my wheelchair use is that my joints are very unstable and I have frequent subluxations and dislocations. I'm like one of those old ball jointed dolls held together with elastic, only the elastic is gone and now I sometimes look like a haunted nightmare creature, as I relocate my own limbs. Last night I was having a bath, the warm water clearly relaxed my muscles too much, and I dislocated a knee as I reached for the shampoo. My knees used to go out all the time before I had a wheelchair. Because I'll re-set them, then manage to sublux them again almost immediately.
Before having the wheelchair, I would have to choose between cancelling all my activities including work, or seeing if I could walk through the pain. I am pretty good at ignoring pain, I can push it into the background. But it makes me worse as a human. Worse at my job, worse as a friend, as a partner. I'll struggle to concentrate and be snappy. I'll not pick up on things. It's like background noise and it gets louder and louder and then sometimes you realise it's so loud you can't ignore it and now you're in trouble.
And then there's the compensatory injuries you get from walking around injured.
Years ago (pre wheelchair) my physio told me that most of my pain was actually being caused by maladaptive and uneven muscle build developed after dislocations. For years and years my knees, hips and ankles were my worst effected joints.
Now they aren't. Because I can use a wheelchair when I need to.
And the wheelchair isn't a perfect solution. Partly because the world is still really pretty inaccessible. So you're still limited by things like stairs and broken lifts.
And also people's attitudes. Wheelchair users get some really gross day to day ablism. I'd love it if strangers didn't make invasive comments about my body.
But dispite all of that, I love my wheelchair and I recognise the huge privilege in getting an active chair that fits me.
And on days when I don't need it - I use a stick. Another auxiliary aid that works for me. I've used them for years, I need it to safely and effectively leave the house (once again, with dog in tow). I'm not ashamed of it, and yes they are in multiple colours and I match them to my outfits, because why on earth wouldn't I? I'm not ashamed of being disabled. If my disabled body upsets you - that is your problem. If seeing more "young women" as the article describes using various aids is upsetting to you - that is your problem.
Sincerely, someone who is absolutely fed up of people policing other people's bodies.
[Image Description: Rachel and Lily Schnauzer. Rachel is wearing a black jumper and yellow check trousers. Lily is wearing a knitted jumper. Rachel is leaning down from her wheelchair to give Lily a treat]
