24/06/2025
Are you a leader or a carer?
This is my Buddy. He's a wonderful dog, he loves routine and structure, and he gets it and that's why he's a wonderful dog. After working with thousands of dogs of all shapes and sizes over the years, we see patterns and one of the biggest is how us humans can slip into “carer” mode rather than leader and decision maker. In my opinion, and my day to day experience as a trainer is that many problem behaviours stem from a lack of leadership, or in other words, failing to provide guidance, structure, or direction and good decision making for the dog. Is this because we are sold the lie that any correction is bad for the dog? Damages your relationship with the dog? Shuts the dog down? I don't buy that, and my experience with some of the most difficult dogs doesn't bear that out. Dogs are amazingly resilient we just pass our own insecurities on to them through wrapping them in cotton wool and constantly telling them, "there there, it's ok" This doesn't inspire confidence.
You can humanise your dog as much as you like, but it’s still a pack animal—hardwired to function within a cooperative social structure.
If the owner abdicates the leadership role, the dog will step into it, even though its uncomfortable doing so.
Poor leadership from the human creates a frightening space for a dog. And a miserable place to be. In my view being a "carer" just makes things worse.
When working with a troubled dog, I always begin with consistent routine, expectations, clear communication, and boundary setting. Many owners resist this approach because they are uncomfortable with it (even though the dog isn't) but once consistent leadership is on the table, with fairness and firmness you can physically see the dog in front of you relax because the burden of being the decision maker has come off their shoulders.
Dogs thrive in structure, and in an environment where the rules and boundaries are clear. We create a space where they can hand all the stress of decision making to their human and when they do, everything changes. My view is that allowing minor indiscretions creates the major behavioural problems, in other words you get what you allow, but you must lead fairly, clearly, positively. We all love our dogs, but if you truly do, you must be willing to love them by leading them.