21/04/2025
When Good Intentions Become Roadblocks!
In todayâs horse world, empathy is everywhere. And thatâs a good thingâuntil it gets in the way of real progress.
Take, for example, a scenario weâve seen all too often. An owner reaches out about a horse who has become unmanageableâdangerous to handle, impossible to load, and triggering fear in both the vet and farrier.
Theyâve tried everything. Iâm called in as the last resort.
But once I arrive and start to work with the horse, Iâm met with immediate restrictions placed by the owner:
â No pressure, not even the subtle kind of pressure and release.
â Canât say no to the horse.
â No discomfort.
â No presence of the arm extension.
Basically, no use of the very tools and principles that could help.
Why? Because of how those tools are perceivedânot how they actually work.
âïžThe Arm Extension Isnât the ProblemâMisunderstanding Is!
The arm extension (a lunge whip) has become a loaded symbol in horse culture. Many people see it as a weapon. But in the hands of a skilled horseman, the arm extension is a neutral toolâa gentle extension of the body that allows us to guide, not punish.
I choose the lunge whip as my arm extension over other tools like the flag, which may look friendlier but often raise the horseâs energy far more. The flag flaps and flutters and can startle a reactive horse. A lunge whip, when handled correctly, (because of its length and flexibility), is quiet and still. It delivers information with zero added energy, and just as importantly, it allows the handler to maintain a safe distanceâcritical when working with dangerous or unpredictable horses.
Tools are not inherently good or bad. Itâs all about the intention, timing, and energy behind their use.
âïžPressure and Release Is a Language, Not a Threat!
Modern training trends often emphasize âno pressure,â focusing entirely on connection, treats, and praise. While those methods have their place, they leave out one of the most powerful and natural ways horses learn: pressure and release.
This isnât a punishment-based systemâitâs the language of the herd. One horse moves into anotherâs space (pressure). The other yields (release). Thatâs how they set boundaries and maintain harmony.
When done well, pressure and release creates a thinking horse:
A handler asks a horse to take a step forward with gentle feel. The moment the horse thinks about moving, the pressure goes away. The horse licks, exhales, and learns: âThat was the right answer.â
When done poorly, pressure becomes chaos:
A person pulls on the lead rope, hard and steadily, waiting for the horse to come forward. The horse plants its feet, confused. The person pulls harder. The horse jerks its head, swings sideways, or even rears. Only then does the person let goâbut now the horse has learned nothing useful. The release came after panic, not after a thoughtful try. This builds resistance, not connection. Thatâs not learningâthatâs a fear-based reaction.
Without education around feel, timing, and energy, pressure and release gets misrepresented. Social media, cookie-cutter programs, and feel-good narratives tell people itâs abusive. But thatâs only true when itâs done without understanding. When applied with skill, itâs one of the kindest ways to communicate with a horse.
âïžWhen Weâre Asked to Helpâbut Not Allowed to Work!
Imagine this: Iâm called in to work with a horse whoâs been labeled dangerous, the one that no one wants to touch anymore. When I arrive, I see immediately that the horse is braced, reactive, and ready to say âno.â But before I can begin, Iâm told by the owner, what not to do. No arm extension, no pressure, no release, no stepping into his spaceâeven when safety demands it. I even get told what and how much food I should give the horse once home.
The emotional energy is high. The humans are nervous. They want changeâbut only if it looks like comfort.
Hereâs the problem: You canât bring in professionals and then ask them to repeat whatâs already failed. You canât expect transformation while refusing the very process that makes it possible. And you definitely canât ask for results while denying access to the tools we know work.
When we arenât allowed to do our job, itâs not just a wasted opportunityâitâs a setup for more frustration. And too often, when progress doesnât happen, the blame lands back on the trainer.
âïžIâm Not a MagicianâIâm a Professional Horse Trainer!
Horses like this donât show up in my world by accident. Iâm the one people call when everyone else has walked away. After 40+ years of working with the most challenging horses, I can say with confidence that very few cases are beyond hope.
But when the people around the horse canâtâor wonâtâshift their mindset, it becomes nearly impossible to help.
And thatâs the true heartbreak. Not being judged. Not being misunderstood. But watching a horse stay stuck because the humans wonât allow the very change they asked for.
I donât come in to dominate or intimidate. I come in to translate! To show the horse that there is a different path forwardâone that is clear, respectful, and safe. But I need the freedom to work. And I need the trust to do it.
âïžTrust Means Letting GoâSo the Horse Can Move Forward!
Every horse is shaped by human choices. And every breakthrough begins with a decision to trust the process.
That doesnât mean giving up your values. It means honoring the reason you asked for help in the first place. If a horse is dangerous, and what youâve been doing hasnât worked, then itâs time to try something different.
Let me do what I do best.
Let me show you that itâs possible.
Let me be the last resortâfor real.
We can be kind and effective. Gentle and structured.
Loving and clear.
That balance is where true transformation happens.
Not just for the horse.
But for the humans, too.
Written by Stefan Forsman
Founder of, Horseman Forsman â The Forsmanship Method
âHelping horses that others gave up on.â
