Dr Fi Integrative Training

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How it Came to Be

Dawn, a new beginning.... the morning of Thursday 17th May 2018, I awoke with a profound awareness that the life I had been meaning to live ever since I was a child was passing me by. In that moment, I was filled with the revelation that only I could change that and within my whole being I sensed that every day I wake up, I have the ability to chose to follow my dream or get caught up in the hum-drum of daily life - work - providing so called security for existing, but not living one’s true purpose. Today, I believed enough in myself, to put myself out there and not shy away from sharing insights and learnings I have, and continue to gather.

What is my purpose? I knew that, but the question was ‘how can I achieve my purpose while sharing time with my own horses as well as with people I have met all over the world?’ All animals are sentient beings and can share their wisdom and knowledge if we allow ourselves to be receptive. Too often I see control and domination as the predominant interaction with animals, rather than stewardship, guidance and partnership. I have hidden my somewhat unusual communicative relationship with (predominantly) horses. In dream state I receive understanding and communication with them. An example of this was when Andy my 17.2hh warmblood, came to me in dream state and shared the experience of why he does not tolerate needles easily. He will reluctantly accept 1 or 2 acupuncture needles, but gets very anxious. Because he had been caught in barbed wire at 18 months old, in dream state he was able to share this, so it became an experience for me... barbed wire wrapping around your leg/arm digging deeper into your skin, is, I have found, definitely a deterrent for needle accepting. While I knew he had be caught in barbed wire, until I had had the ‘experience’, I had not actually stopped to empathetically relate to how this would affect one’s psyche. Other dreams have been extremely eye opening, like having a continuation of waking life while asleep. As I opened to verbalising my animal communications, I found horses especially, would answer my mental questions with pictures, or words, in some cases. Zac (the Yak), was so called because not only did he neigh out every time I went to greet him, but he was a great talker in the mental realm, in fact the most talkative horse I have met.

In 2002, after nearly 5 years in my first job in small animal practice, I was supposedly saving to go on my OE. But I was more interested in astral travel rather than polluting the environment by physical plane travel, and to be honest, owning my own farm, was far more enticing as I had been dreaming it into being, since early childhood. My family had not shared my equine, nor country living passion, so growing up I had to be content with visiting cousins on their farms, helping out on lambing beats, learning to ride, a Clydesdale, ba****ck, (looking back this probably wasn’t the best introduction to riding), but it did get me riding. Oh how I yearned to ride a horse, well! (and still do). It’s like I can feel the movement in my body of a centaur, how the partnership should be... but if there is one thing I have learnt in this life, dedication and hard work are essential to reap rewards, (often when you least expect them). So, now I feel it is time to follow my passion whole heartedly, (while continuing work), but to bring balance to my work / personal life. If that means getting up earlier.... so be it.

6am 17 May: Darkness becoming enlightened with daybreak, interspersed with thunder and lightening, rain and even hail at one point. I was not put off. The familiar mixing of horse feeds reminds me of museli making. For the horses, the familiar clatter of buckets had there attention, they were present and waiting. Dawn..... crisp clean air invigorates the lungs, (if one remembers to inhale deeply). The bird song is a choir of celebration and rejoicing, resonating through the trees and permeating the invisible ether with energy. I was reminded we then inhale these subtle forms of energy during the day, receiving essential nourishment in unseen forms. Thank you birds, thank you trees, rain, thunder and lightening. You are invigorating! Re-membering...... upon waking, reuniting body parts (spirit, yin & yang, permeating physical, emotional and mental aspects) to partake in the joys of physical experience. To remember to give gratitude for what one has, starts the day well. This is the secret to a happy life. Blessed.... for many things, but especially to be able to share much knowledge; inherited from ancestors, learnt from many tutors along the path, sharing their experiences of life and the desire to study, books and Nature. Special mention of Selwyn Wood, (RIP) neighbour in a different lifetime, fellow horse lover, a generous gentleman. He would drive me to my weekly horse riding lessons (until I was of an age where he taught me to drive), and after 5 years, gifted me my first horse, Amigo Sagaz (my Wise Friend, who turned out to be Scandalous Amigo, the horse with 2 mothers - but that is another story). Blessed to have known him and MANY others.

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