09/28/2023
What are you scared of - and I mean really, really scared of?
We all have our own phobias, and things that make us anxious or afraid. Some of us are more prone to feeling worried than others. Snakes, sharks, spiders, and heights are common ones that spring to mind. Other people are scared of wasps, certain animals (like birds or dogs), or even the sight of certain foods will send them running. I remember seeing a man on television who had a huge aversion to peaches, which made him fearful, and he once ran out of the house when he saw peaches on a shampoo bottle. It doesn't matter if that fear seemed strange to some people, because that was his own very real fear based response.
When you are faced with something that truly terrifies you, or think it might be around, a few things will happen to you.
Your heart will start pounding in your chest, sending blood to your muscles and tissues that enable you to move quickly.
You will start breathing at a faster rate, to get more oxygen in to your blood.
Your pupils will start to dilate (although you might not be aware of that).
And you may respond to what you are scared of by doing one if these things...
You might freeze. Go still and hope that it goes away, making little noise.
You might run for safety, maybe even screaming as you do.
You might run towards what you are scared of, ready to scare it off and get it away from you. You might even go on the offense, shouting and swinging, in an effort to keep yourself safe.
You might start nervous laughing and acting silly even if you aren't genuinely happy.
Have you ever been so scared of something that one of these things has happened to you? I have, I can recall the feeling well. It isn't nice and can leave us feeling bad for a while after. We might take some time to recover. The incident might even leave us traumatised and more on edge in case it happens again.
So why, in a day and age where we know so much about dog behaviour and the emotions that dogs can experience when they are behaving a certain way, do some still recommend marching them TOWARDS the thing that they are scared of - too close for feelings of safety - only to punish them if they freeze (and stop walking), or react (bark and lunge), or pull you to try and run away, or start acting 'silly' by ragging their lead, jumping up, mouthing, or trying to zoom about (our nervous laughing)?
A fearful and anxious dog will not be "made better" by forcing them to get closer than they are comfortable to their triggers for fear or anxiety, and punishing them when they inevitably respond in some way. Long term, it will only make them worse, and in the meantime, they'll become more avoidant, less trusting, and less optimistic.
We CAN help dogs to feel more confident around their triggers. It is part of my day in, day out job. We can do it while keeping them feeling confident, relaxed, and happy - we can build on that, and grow it!
If you have something you are terrified of and want to steer clear of, please consider how you would feel if you couldn't escape whatever that trigger was and were punished whenever you responded to it. Would it be reasonable of somebody to punish you for trying to run screaming from a spider, if that is what frightens you? Would it make sense? Of course not.
We don't need to use force, fear, or punishment. We don't need to force unnecessary proximity. None of these are confidence builders in dogs, and if we can help a dog to feel happier and more confident, we will see behavioural changes (and have a truly happier dog for it).
(Scheduled post for 28th September 2023 during a break from work, waiting list for appointments including new clients, please email [email protected] to join the waiting list and I will be in touch in the new year. There will be a delay in responding to comments during this time)