10/21/2023
Ya'll know that tomorrow is that there Renaissance Feast round here. That's where they decorate that coliseum (not like that Roman one over in Italy mind ya, this one's a right smaller). But they turn that place into what you might call a medieval hangout. That's where you buy a ticket and you can come dressed like Robin Hood.
Mom 'n 'Nem gonna be Robin and Marion, since them two were star crossed lovers, and Mom 'n 'Nem are cross eyed so it works. Clutch is gonna be friar tuck, 'cause he loves to drink that sacramental wine. Now we don't have anything sacramental, but he does have a batch of shine that Cletus cooked up awhile back. It's been sittin' in the cellar fermentin' since that first Covid lockdown. Clutch is gonna be Alan A Dale, cause that fella played a mean old time guitar and sang. Clutch has his daddy's guitar and knows every Bocephus song by heart! I reckon they got the entertainment already figured out, but if there's a lull, he can stand up and get a sing a long goin'!
I've been thinkin' about what I wanna do 'fer a character. I thought about bein' a "merry man" of Robin Hood, but I gotta tell ya straight, I don't do tights. So... I reckon I'm goin' as the Evil Sheriff of some town called Nottingham. If I had that sort of a name as my home town, I guess I'd be evil and angry too. No offence to any English folks readin' this. But Nottingham ain't got nothin' on Cloverdale.
I got my high school football jersey as my chain mail shirt. I figure the number on the back 'll be how many fellah's I done in with my sword. Evil folk would want to be proud of that, know whut I mean? Spray painted the jersey silver and I'm good to go. And speakin' of a sword, Claude has an old VHS antenna that blew down durin' some big wind awhile back. I just took one of them long pieces, and added a shorter piece crossways on the end and now I got me one. It's more like one of them 3 mousketeers swords... rappers or something like that, but it'll do. Mom 'n 'Nem had a giant Folgers coffee can they'd just finished, so I ripped the label off and cut out eye holes - instant helmet. It fits a little snug, and doesn't cover the whole face, but I reckon the important parts 'll be safe. Pants were the hard part, but I took my huntin' camo and spray painted them silver. Now my pants look like amor, and the dark blotches look like I done got dent up in a lotta battles. 'Fer shoes, the best I could do was some old work boots. Just give 'em a coat of silver spray paint and now I'm ready to fight! Well, as it ain't real armor, I reckon I'm ready to feast!
Mom 'n 'Nem said them tickets are goin' good and there may not be any left 'fer tomorrow night. But that don't mean you can't still have some fun. We got that there Renaissance Faire happenin' next Saturday and Sunday and it's 100% free! Just show up, hang out, and get your history on. Maybe I'll see some of you.
