Four Paws & You Dog Training LLC

10/05/2025

Losses That Don't Get Flowers: Disenfranchised Grief in Animal Care
a Let’s Get Real conversation sponsored by the Phenix Advocacy Center (PAC)

Hosted by Colleen Pelar with special guest, Melissa Trevathan-Minnis, PhD
Monday, October 27, 2025, at 12:00 pm Eastern via Zoom
Cost: $10 (donation to the non-profit PAC)

Join us for a conversation about the grief that doesn't get acknowledged—the kind that comes with saying goodbye to animals you've known for years, euthanizing animals you've cared for, or carrying the emotional weight of decisions that happen behind the scenes.

This is disenfranchised grief: loss that's real and painful, but that the world around you doesn't recognize or validate. For those of us in animal care, these unwitnessed losses can accumulate quietly, leaving us feeling isolated or wondering why we can’t stop thinking about a situation that occurred months ago.

In this discussion, we'll explore why these losses matter, how they affect us differently than grief that gets seen and supported, and most important, how to honor them in ways that actually help. Whether you're carrying fresh grief or old grief that never quite got processed, this is a space where your feelings make sense and your losses count.

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You must join this chat live - recordings will not be shared as our topics are often sensitive.

Once you have made your $25 donation, we will email you the Zoom link for this event.

Thank you for supporting the PAC! We are advocates for R+ canine professionals.

Disclaimer: This PAC-sponsored event is for educational purposes only. If you are in need of professional help from a qualified mental health professional, please visit the resource section of our PAC website: www.phenixadvocacycenter.org/resources

09/29/2025

Challenge the narrative you have about our dog with the information right in front of you!

If you want drama, stream Netflix. 🍿
If you want to help your learner, start observing behavior and the environment, then analyse the contingencies.”

06/19/2025

We were nominated as a pet trainer in the services category!

If you have time and want to show support, click on the link below.

Voting can happen daily until 7 July!

Vote once per day from June 16 through July 7.

02/25/2025

This beautiful boy is Tank! He and his person participated in a 3 month coaching program with me!

This coaching program was geared towards coaching Tank’s person not just through behavior modification, but the coaching supported them through the hills and valleys of learning.

Growth is not just about making progress, but also how to handle and flow with the muck of learning too and the lessons of when things don’t go as planned.
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I'd like to share my family's experience with Katherine as our coach to help us navigate sharing our lives with our pup, Tank.
He's been like no other pup any of us have experienced. Feeling frustrated and challenged, I reached out to Katherine for help. She adapted a program for our family that helped us understand Tank, our feelings, and how to feel confident being his advocate and gave us tools to help us .. which in turn helped him. Our journey continues with Tank with a renewed sense of openess to navigate where our relationship with him goes.

02/02/2025

Early Bird pricing ends Feb. 5th for the PAC-sponsored Emotional CPR virtual course!

Early bird pricing: $150
After Feb. 5: $250

YOU are worth taking the time for this life-changing course. This is a unique opportunity to take this course from the privacy of your home and share the experience with other canine professionals.

If you have a hardship or belong to a minority population and want to know about scholarships for this training, please email PAC Founder Annie Phenix: [email protected]

https://form.jotform.com/243364502379156

Virtual Emotional CPR (eCPR) Certification Training Registration Sponsored By Phenix Advocacy Center (PAC)February 19 and 21, 2024

We apologize that our credit card payment method was not working for a while yet is now available. The early bird discount has been extended to Feb. 5th.
If you have questions or any difficulty registering, please contact us at: [email protected].

This training is open to all positive reinforcement canine professionals, including shelter and rescue workers, ACOs, groomers, dog walkers, dog day care workers, etc.
Dates/Sessions:
Wednesday, February 19, 2025
Friday, February 21, 2025

Time all sessions:
9 am - 4 pm EDT (New York US Time) with a 60 minute lunch break
12 noon we will log off for lunch and return at 1 pm until 4 pm
Follow this link for Time Zone Converter: www.thetimezoneconverter.com

Requirements:
This Virtual eCPR Training needs a minimum of 10 participants and is limited to no more than 14 participants.
To receive your certification you must participate from the beginning to the end of training to receive your certificate.
We are asking everyone to have their own computer and if you're training in the same building or house with someone else please make sure you are in separate rooms and in an uninterrupted quiet place to participate during this training. Also, you will need a good internet connection for Zoom audio and video. We strongly encourage you to use your computer for a better experience, but could include your iPad (and perferably not your phone).
We are asking everyone to have on their camera and to fully be present as we take this special training journey together.

DESCRIPTION:
eCPR is a profound process of reclaiming our Connection (to self and others), embodying emPowerment, and ultimately feeling Revitalized. The certification training engages your heart and mind in an experiential and unfolding process that includes embracing mutual support. With over a decade of providing this training widely in the U.S with rapid expansion globally, the consistent feedback is that it helps us become better listeners and supporters, it changes our perception of not only ourselves but of the world around us; it teaches us how to tap into our well of compassion and enhance all our relationships.
Thriving in these times of uncertainty means we need to practice self-care and reclaim our ability to feel connected, empowered, and revitalized. Honestly, many of us were pleasantly surprised at how effective eCPR training has been in our new virtual training space; the energy, the safety, the sense of closeness and connection are all there. We invite you to join us on this deepening journey.
Those of us with lived experience of severe emotional distress have been well prepared for this global crisis because we have long known that our healing and resilience are enhanced by our connecting at a heart-to-heart level. eCPR certification training helps to alleviate the trauma of isolation and separation by laying a foundation for healing and wellness.

eCPR Is Recommended For:
• Peer Organizations/Groups
• Mental Health Professionals
• Healthcare Professionals
• Veterinarians
• School Personnel
• Public Safety Staff
• Community Organizations
• Family, Friends and Neighbors
• Faith-Based Communities
• Most importantly, it's recommended for YOU!

*You can earn up to 12 hours of CEU's depending on your state requirements. We leave a spot on your certificate to add your CEU license/certification number.

01/19/2025

As a pet parent of a newly adopted dog, a GSD in fact, being proactive and setting up a doggy den and seeing the opportunities for success has helped Hank progress in adjusting into our household.

In a week, he makes choices to stop barking at the fence when our neighbor’s dogs come out.

He’s calmer in the home and chooses to relax and when he does get excited (he’s not even 2yrs old yet), he’s quicker to calm himself down.

He’s showing more patience with waiting for things like meals, hellos and play time which helps him to choose to relax.

Now, with focusing on his emotional well being as the priority, I can see how he needs more support during transitional times and even sharing space (separated by a gate) with Jack.

The lessons I’m learning are really just releasing old thoughts and beliefs about the mistakes I made with Jack 14yrs ago before I knew what I know now.

Fear still creeps in and for me, I’m able to reframe the fear into taking action. One small step at a time and celebrating the success and learning from mistakes.

Always be kind to yourself and your companion animals. No living being thrives spiraling in shame and guilt.

Sharing my first pic of Hank!

https://www.coldnosecollege.com/the-7-habits-of-highly-effective-dog-owners?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR3WraRnLQg8ZOCCZmrFs2OZIHQF3b1PV3m6KxkiC8zYs8QkflDr-JmilN8_aem__iA3wTQ91NXDo5hbUWXboQ

11/13/2024

“The moment in front of you is not bothering you. You are bothering yourself about the moment that is in front of you.” Michael Singer

When something happens like your dog barking or pulling on the leash, you feel angry and frustrated.

Your perception about that moment of the barking or pulling is what colors the experience.

You are making yourself angry and frustrated. You are labeling the experience as bad or things aren’t perfect or you don’t have time for this.

Then you yell at your dog for vocalizing or you yank on the leash because you tell yourself you can’t handle what’s happening with your dog.

What is showing up in these situations is your own fear.

Fear of not being good enough about keeping your dog safe.

Fear of not being perfect in having a “bomb proof” dog.

Fear of what others are going to say about you and how others perceive you.

Your mind is very powerful, but your mind isn’t so powerful you lose your ability to choose.

You can choose to handle the situation and look at what’s happening inside of you when the world presents a moment you’re saying is bad or terrible or you want to run and hide.

Take the moment and take a conscious breath.

Breathe in and feel the breath travel through you.

Exhale and take a moment and feel the breath leave your body.

Repeat.

See if you can observe the thoughts that come up and learn to let them go.

The only way for your body to let go of past hurts or pain is to allow the sensations to pass through you.

Allow yourself to feel.

Observe the sensations.

Remain present.

This moment is the only moment that matters and it will go by in an instant.

Choose wisely.

10/31/2024

Normalize failing or making mistakes as part of your journey rather than labeling yourself or someone else (dog included) as being bad.

Our culture is fixated on success and achievement and moving on to the next that we make every effort to avoid the opportunity of learning within lesson of not getting the thing right.

Whatever “the thing” you deemed as the goal or outcome is not the source of your happiness.

Discovering the peace that’s already inside of you when you live fully present in each moment is available to you.

It’s up to you to be brave and be curious to what each day’s lessons are trying to show you.

You can start by not shaming yourself or others (dog included) when something doesn’t go as planned or mistakes happen.

Learn to flow with what is!

10/30/2024

You’ve come to realize what you’re currently doing is no longer working.

You’re tired.

You don’t see any changes happening with your dog and you continue feeling frustrated.

Simultaneously, you know things can be different.

You are feeling the push to make some changes and also feeling the pull to go back to where you were even though it was no longer working.

The liminal space you’re in is uncomfortable and it leaves you feeling uneasy.

You want something different, but crave familiarity.

You want your dog to change, so you can feel more at peace.

You also realize that if you want your dog to do something different, you too have to show up and do different too.

You resist.

You deny that anything you do needs to be different.

You retreat to what you know.

When you do, you also feel uncomfortable there too.

This limbo is part of your growth and it is a marker for change.

It’s ok to feel overwhelmed and uncertain. Growing and learning something new is unpredictable.

It has to be. To do something new and looking to make a change means you will becoming an explorer in your life.

You are charting your next steps in a direction that is more aligned for you.

Be kind to yourself. Be easy on yourself as you move and show up differently.

At the very least, have a good sense of humor and don’t take yourself or your dog so seriously.

You can choose how you experience learning something new and when you can see the joy emanating from your dog in learning together, feel your heart burst open allow the light to shine in.

You deserve it!