
01/30/2025
"You must do the thing you think you cannot do." Eleanor Roosevelt
What a horribly fitting quote for today on my calendar. The past days I have been so off, feeling this awful quietness so deep in me and I couldn't understand why, I couldn't shake it, couldn't seem to get out of the void. Then the memory came up of what today is, the one year mark of letting go of Thursday.Even more fitting that the one year anniversary is on a Thursday Our hearts and souls remember even when our brains try their damnedest to forget.
One year seems so impossible. One year was something I never had thought I'd have been able to do, just like I never thought I'd be able to bear saying goodbye.
Loss never gets easier, I think we just get better at carrying on around that hole in ourselves. I know that the depth of the grief I still feel is a reflection of how deep and strong that love went. My love for one of the most amazing little mares, one of the strongest moms, a one of a kind soul who pushed me to grow and learn and do better all while loving me through the journey. And what a journey it was, one I am so grateful to have been able to have so much time with Thursday.
I don't think things like that just happen by accident. I firmly think I needed to see that quote today, no matter how painful a reminder it is. I must continue to carry on with that love in my heart even when it feels like I cannot possibly. Remembering all the wonderful moments with her and all the love shared. And after it all, Thursdays are still my favorite day of the week.