04/01/2024
I heard this today on this week's Positively Dog Training podcast by Victoria Stilwell, with Sean Brown as a guest this week. I am a sucker for human references to explain known dog problems, it helps us to understand our dogs mental processing more.
Sean Brown said (I am paraphrasing heavily here): If you don't love going to dance clubs, and someone tells you they can train you to like it, you'll never truly love it. You may go because they offer to buy you a drink every time, but it's not that you're suddenly enthralled with going to the club. You likely just have other preferences of staying home, or going to a bar.
He hit the nail on the head. As an introvert, I can feel the anxiety creeping in just thinking about standing in a crowded club. If I've just had a bad experience, sure a few good experiences can tip the scales. However, if I have a fundamental desire to just spend quality time at home, that'll be where I am most relaxed.
If you adopt a homebody kind of dog, and want it to be an adventurer with you, you're going to see "behavioral issues". They can present as anxious or reactive sitting at breweries with you. It's not that they have a problem that needs to be fixed, it's that we are trying to force a square peg into a round hole. We're saying the square peg needs to be shaved down to fit in the round hole, instead of just adjusting and finding the square hole or picking up the round peg.
We need to be assessing if we are meeting our own dog's desires, or if we're just forcing them to meet our own and deeming it an issue when they don't. We need to be bringing home dogs that better fit the lifestyle we would like them to be in, instead of bringing home dogs for the way they look.
We also need to be flexible and understand that each dog is an individual. You may bring home the perfect breed for social outings, but that individual dog may have a preference against it. What is your plan? Are you okay letting that dog relax at home while you enjoy your activities? Is there a compromise? An activity you both enjoy?
Help your dog help you.
