PAWSitively Calm

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PAWSitively Calm

PAWSitively Calm is a fully licensed & insured Family Dog Training business focused on State of Mind Helping families live CALM, happy lives with their dogs.
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A Central Florida Family Dog Training business focused on Balanced K9 Training. So why so much focus on creating CALM? Aren’t our dogs supposed to have fun and round around like maniacs? Do you have a dog that reacts on walks, reacts in the house to the dog on TV, is fearful or stressed out, creating calm can have a major impact on arousal issues. Does your dog pull on the leash, rush the door, wh

ine all the time, guard his food bowl, jump up onto the counter to grab what’s cookin, act crazy in your car, and is constantly misbehaving? Well you’re not alone. Most dog owners suffer from bratty pets due to the lack of structure and consequences needed to stop unwanted behavior. Slowing these guys down will help them make better decisions that would otherwise seem impossible. Whatever your problem may be, I am here to help you create the framework needed to ensure your dog is the calm, balanced pooch you have always imagined. I started PAWSitively Calm with the intent on helping struggling families live a more balanced and calm life with their overly excited, stressed out, bratty pets. Most of my clients say “I just want to take my dog out in public with me without him going bananas”. You see, if you could have stepped into my world a couple of years ago, you would have seen an out of control, overly aroused pack that would not stop barking, freaking out at the slightest sound, growling at visitors if they came too close, and separation anxiety at its finest. I was literally embarrassed to go out in public on leash with any of them. Packing up my three dogs in the Jeep for a beach vacation was always a nightmare with all of them barking as soon as the parking brake was engaged and the keys jingled. So there I began my research on overcoming and tackling these issues by watching and devouring any Cesar Milan book or video I could get my hands on. Something struck a nerve for me when I saw that in every episode, the owner played a significant role in creating that very behavior their dog was exhibiting. Could I really be the problem? Could too much loving and not enough structure really create this kind of madness? It sure can! And I’m here to tell you that it can all be turned around. If you want your relationship with your dog to change, you first, must change. It just takes a little bit of hard work on the dynamic of the household, and I’m here to steer you in the right direction. Rules, boundaries, and consequences are what is needed to create that balance between affection and leadership. When one of these aspects out-weighs the other, a whole slew of bad behaviors can arise. Your relationship with your dog should be permission based. Everything your dog is allowed to do, is because you gave him permission to do so. I am here to help guide you through some basic core skills in establishing your role within the pack so that you can truly have the peace of mind you’ve always imagined.

23/06/2024

A good percentage of dogs with behavioral issues that come through our programs are free-fed. This is the practice of leaving food out all day long for the dog to graze as they please. Most owners that relinquish this opportunity to take more control of one of their dog’s most valuable resources, do so because of their dog’s finicky eating habits.

Regardless if a dog is finicky around feeding time or not, they WILL NEVER STARVE themselves. Their primitive fight for survival will kick in and overcome any anxiety or stress that may be suppressing their hunger drive.

Or, on the contrary, there are some of us that offer an over-indulgence of food as an emotional substitute for filling our own needs. Unconscious motives (because it feels good to pamper our pets), to manipulate the dog’s affection for you, can lead to a seriously unsavory results.

Now realize, free-feeding doesn’t necessarily lead to, or cause bad behavior! But… if the dog is reactive, pushy, obstinate, anxious, nervy, or willfully defies commands, you may want to reconsider one of the easiest ways to shift their mindset over one of their most prized resources.

Of all the resources your dog fancies, food is by far the most critical to control. It’s not enough to just hand over food indulgently! It’s HOW you give the food that determines the corresponding behavior. A dog whose resources are magically dumped in front of them without having worked or earned it, will soon feel entitled, and most certainly won’t feel dependent on you.

Free-feeding absolves your role as pack leader.

Teaching a dog to WAIT for Permission before diving into their food bowl can make a tremendous difference in their overall mindset and the way they view you as someone to have to listen to.

By taking a few extra moments at mealtimes to wait for eye contact, and calm and polite behavior, rather than giving into a dog that is overly excited and pushy when being fed, can be the difference between a dog that resource guards, barges through thresholds, is reactive on leash, or one that truly respects your wishes. You may not think bad eating manners have nothing to do with any of those behavioral transgressions, but they do.

EVERYTHING, every interaction... MATTERS.

I like to have dogs wait calmly for my release command “free” before eating, rather than allowing impatient whining or anticipating food. Dogs are fed two meals a day and get 30 minutes to finish. If they ignore the food, it gets poured back into the bag, and they aren’t offered a meal again until the next feeding time.

So many seemingly unrelated behavioural issues can be prevented by not only feeding in the crate, but by teaching your dog polite manners and impulse control at mealtime.

22/06/2024

A well behaved dog requires attention to sustain.

A “human’s” attention.

Every singular interaction we exchange with a dog (or lack there of), creates a perception of us and the environment they live within — a perception that DOES NOT go overlooked, no matter how small or seemingly benign.

Trapped in thought on what needs to get done, held hostage by our social media feed, that next business transaction, or the day’s To-Do’s that seem more important, our dogs are left with no one to look to for instruction.

Our “message” will perpetuate or diffuse our dog’s current behavior. The dog will report through their own body language what they’re feeling in the moment. Pacing, whining, barking, growling, destruction, uncontrollable tap dancing, or spinning in panicked reactivity, are all symptoms of an unstable, unsure, and unpredictable home, with no one to look to for guidance.

Our dogs provide each of us a reprieve to the present moment, and insight on what needs to change in order for harmony to take place. It is within this space that we can begin to discover what our pet needs to be truly content...

OUR ATTENTION.

If the dog is consistently misbehaving, then it’s time for us to become hyper-aware, hyper-present, and hyper-focused on our second by second interactions, and the messages those exchanges are signaling. It’s time to TUNE IN, become intentional, and get present with what will move us forward, or what may still be holding us back.

All dogs deserve the thoughtful curation that ignites the awareness of choices and respectful behavior.

21/06/2024

Penny has begun her Public Access training!

We went to Lowes, to test all of her obedience out in the real world to see what gaps we may still have to fill for her. Being a pretty temperamentally solid gal, we simply just needed to help her retain her focus.

Pulling like a tank a mere week ago, we have been working hard on introducing this big girl to the “deferential” side of our relationship track.

We are thrilled to be entering into the 2nd week of training! I LOVE this part. And for Penny, it is now a just matter of controlled exposure to create a new default habit of relying on her person FIRST.

Stay tuned for more from this big lady!

21/06/2024

By and large, I think the biggest struggle we see for so many owners is in their feeling mean, guilty, worried, or uncertain when it comes to working through struggle or facing PUSHBACK from their dog. Worried they may trample feelings or ruin their bond, owners hesitate, or even avoid working through the sticky situation—like getting an obstinate dog into a crate, the car, bath tub, or perhaps getting them to even walk down the street.

So instead of approaching the challenge with certainty and confidence, the worried owner backs down when their dog throws a fit and refuses, all while they tally the conflict as win for themselves, and run with it the next time the owner’s desire doesn’t quite jibe with their own.

This does not mean we have to be heavy-handed, messy, or emotionally charged when a dog offers their person opposition. But having the RESOLVE to follow through even when presented with a protest, can make most FEEL as if they are being compulsive. Unfortunately, it is this FEELING that is the crack in the foundation that makes way for continued protest and resistance in the dog’s mind.

So now we have a draw: The reluctant owner feels mean and uncomfortable pushing just enough to work through the protest, and the dog senses their hesitancy, offering even more resistance to ensure the impasse continues. Both are stuck. And the struggle continues to worsen.

My advice: work on YOUR feelings. Dogs aren’t nearly as delicate as we all make them out to be. Find that sweet spot of assertiveness where the stubborn dog offers their best instead of playing you like a fool.

20/06/2024

Which persona do you think you play for your dog…

Landlord? (Above)
Roommate? (Equal)
Or Tenant? (Below)

All three paint quite a different association. Whatever that perception may be, your ROLE will either undermine your believability, or embolden it.

Dogs are keenly aware of what’s up for debate, and what’s worth debating. Overly accommodating owners create an opportunity-rich environment, ready to be taken advantage of. Owners that feel bad, mean, or guilty for laying down the law for their dog, should not be surprised when the dog ends up creating laws that fit their own agenda.

Owners that let transgressions slide, don’t follow through, spoil, coddle, hesitate, and allow, create dogs that assume the Leadership role, always push boundaries, set their own rules, and sometimes deliver consequences to their own humans.

Dogs thrive in the subordinate role. After all, they are living in a human world. Rules, and consequences for breaking them, cultivate respect and believability—and uncannily, a deeper bond. Trust isn’t created through allowances, permissiveness, and whatever your dog needs to make them comfortable. It keeps them stuck where they are, and en route to becoming even worse off. It is the very reason we experience bad behavior in the first place.

19/06/2024

The nervy Doodle, Finn, has started his public access work! As little as a week ago it would have been impossible to walk this super nervous, impulsive, & insecure kid ANYWHERE, let alone a store, without him spooking or irrationally reacting.

We’ve been working hard on conditioning Finn to defer to his human first, over his unhealthy, reflexive habits. Tuning out the world and listening to his person is critical in developing a more stable, subordinate state of mind. This process has involved a comprehensive program based in PERMISSION ONLY ACTIVITY, where every step and choice he’s made, has been managed and dictated by the humans. This has slowed down his issues with processing, creating a bit more self awareness!

We headed to Lowes today to start solidifying Finn’s obedience out in the real world. Lowes is loaded with things a dog has never seen, heard, or smelled! And for this pup, unfamiliar sounds can flip him into an unhealthy headspace.

Working around a ton of distraction like this desensitizes Finn to the unfamiliar, and helps him learn to defer to his person when confronted with triggers that concern him. Having a confident Leader to guide him through the experience, while also holding him accountable for any panic or irrationality, is key. Finn then learns to look to his person instead of being overly concerned about everything else around us.

Nice job sweet man!!

19/06/2024

Tiny, infrequent, thoughtless, and seemingly harmless decisions NEVER STAY TINY. They compound and grow exponentially larger, intentional, and potentially dangerous, with practice.

The cute “woof-woof-woof” at the fire hydrant turns into full scale assaults on strollers, the innocent “woof” at the knock on the door turns into frothy warnings at all guest appearances. The easy-to-ignore whimpering at the unfamiliar dog during your walk that turns into a war zone on leash at the sight of all dogs. The cute pawing for your attention turns into nips and demand barking when ignored. The following you from room to room that turns into destructive Separation Anxiety as soon as you put on your shoes. The cute growling as a pup when you take away his toy that turns into a bite when you try to push him off the couch.

Unaddressed “small moments” always lead to big moments.

The BIG stuff NEVER manifests overnight. It went unnoticed, was dismissed, and maybe even unintentionally encouraged, until it reached a point where the behavior became so shocking that it can no longer be ignored.

“Oh my gosh, I can’t believe they did that! They’ve never done that before!”

Small moments of allowance create deep patterns of being. Disregarding this simple fact will inevitably produce an outcome we did not intend. And so decent pups, entirely capable of being a pleasure to live with, end up monsters on a path of destruction.

Pay attention to, and address, the smaller moments of instability, pushiness, irrationality, thoughtlessness, and disrespect, and you will never see the big stuff come to light.

19/06/2024

We never know how a dog’s behavior will evolve when we do finally decide to adopt. Breed tendency and disposition, both play large roles in determining this.

But there is one factor that rises above all else that has the most influence on WHO our dog becomes…

YOU.

The environment YOU provide, and the information YOU share within it, by far outweigh breed tendency or temperament’s overall impact.

Whether we end up experiencing reactivity, over-protection, resource guarding, territoriality, extreme fear/skittishness, toxic dependency, destructive separation anxiety, phobias, paranoia, obsessiveness, entitlement, brattiness, bullying, extreme opportunism, aggression, or just plain delinquency…

An environment that neglects to offer any structure (clear boundaries, rules, and accountability for crossing such), will likely gift one with any combo of the above list of issues, along with frustration, headache, and befuddlement.

Each bit of missing information that we leave unclear for the dog, is like playing Russian Roulette with the above list of symptoms.

This is precisely why you hear me preach time and again about how the fundamental principles of living harmoniously with a dog (regardless of breed or personality): Structure, Rules, Boundaries, and Accountability, are the KEYS to preventing the laundry list of symptomatic undesirables mentioned above.

The only thing that personality and breed tendency SHOULD dictate, is the degree to which all of the core foundational concepts are at play, day to day.

When we fail to understand the impact of our neglect to provide a dog’s basic needs for wellbeing, unsavory behaviors come to a head. The thing is, basic Leadership, Guidance, or Instruction, aren’t complex ideas to master. The only thing they DO require from us is desire, fortitude, emotional benevolence, and a good long look in the mirror.

The bottom line…

We cannot be baffled the next time some disconcerting conduct from the dog turns our life sideways if we’re still willing to play Behavioral Roulette. You can control the game, or the game will control you.

18/06/2024

NONE OF US!

I mean none of us! Enjoy seeing our babes uncomfortable.

Unfortunately, most owners tend to feel so sorry for dogs that fall to the unstable side of the spectrum that they baby, coddle, avoid, & shield them from experiencing all imagined discomfort, leaving them stuck, and far less developed than they could be.

Dogs aren’t nearly as fragile as we make them out to be! And we all know that it is from struggle and the discomfort from our mistakes that we make the most profound personal transformations.

When humans bring the full scope of Leadership to the relationship (being firm when necessary, and soft when appropriate), our dogs learn right from wrong, yes from no, or keep doing that, & stop doing that. Insecure dogs will never figure this out on their own, and is precisely why they need US to Lead them through life’s choices.

It’s as equally important to shower our dogs with rewards for doing something well, as it is to enlighten them for making unhealthy choices. So if you find yourself falling in any one of these categories, simply do the opposite;)

Hope this helps!

18/06/2024

We all learn through Cause & Effect.

The good stuff is created no differently than the bad stuff.

It’s not just one, singular moment that trains or un-trains. Learning occurs through a series of compounded interactions, good or bad.

In order to move a dog into a healthier headspace & solid behavior, a trainer INTENTIONALLY reinforces what they want more of, & addresses what they disagree with. This then provides clear expectations for the dog about how to navigate the world around them. Consistently rinse & repeat this process over time, and you create a well adjusted, stable dog.

Reverse the recipe above — inconsistent, negotiable rules + low expectations + invaluable outcomes for bad choices — and you get a maladjusted, misbehaved, rude effect. Pattern negative behavior with this formula over and over, and you create what looks to be a very UN-trained, poorly behaved dog.

Training a dog isn’t rocket surgery. It’s super simple, cause & effect, common sense stuff. Unfortunately, our own human baggage has a tendency to get in the way of doing what is necessary to succeed.

The key to living harmoniously lies within our INTENTION.

17/06/2024

Meet Hazel, Peeps!

This cutie-patootie is here to address a laundry list of unhealthy habits fueled by intense insecurity and over-arousal. Jumping, Incessant Barking/Whining, Pulling On Leash, Stranger Danger, Nipping when feeling pressured, Charging the Front Door, Over-Protection, Toxic Dependency, and just plain not listening.

No different than any of the other fear reactive pups we’ve had prior, Hazel has a MAJOR insecurity issue, and cannot seem to find that off switch of contentedness, most especially when anything unexpected occurs!

So stay tuned while we get this girlie into a healthier headspace so that her family can trust her around the unpredictable!

17/06/2024

A dog will only ever rise to the standard their person demands.

Dogs and children aren’t born brats. They’re shaped and formed by what we allow, excuse, forgive, ignore, overlook, OR prevent, deny, refuse, restrict, and discipline.

So you’ve just sent inconsiderate pup off to Finishing School to learn about “upper-class” social etiquette and grace. Clear expectations for proper behavior were held to the highest standard in preparation for entry into society.

—Minding and respecting all humans
—Listening and complying the 1st time something is asked
—Waiting for permission at all doorways
—Walking nicely on leash
—No back talk or sass
—No rude or inconsiderate gestures towards others
—Please & Thank you’s are paramount
—Courtesy at all times
—Table Manners, no begging

Trainers can pass along protocols, techniques, tools, and effort to owners, but they cannot pass along the personal demand for respect. You cannot coast on a trainer’s past performance. To return to a home where belching at the dinner table, and passing gas are acceptable offenses, yet the expectation for sustained courtesy still exists, is folly.

No matter how much training a person puts their unruly dog through, they will only ever mirror the surroundings that permit, condone, and indulge. A dog will not change their behavior until the environment that created it changes its STANDARD for proper etiquette.

How high are your standards?

16/06/2024

What we don’t use, we lose.

The athlete that stops exercising will certainly lose strength, stamina, and endurance. The same concept would apply to the person learning a new language or skill.

If we don’t practice it regularly, we lose its precision.

Our dogs are no different.

Everything is fresh and sharp the first two weeks after training. The dog is well mannered, and Johnie-on-the-spot. Man! Things are pretty amazing, and you’re really enjoying your new life with your now well trained dog.

6 months later, things start to unravel.

Structure and accountability start to slip as micro-transgressions go unchecked.

These things do not go by unnoticed for the dog. They tally every instance their owner isn’t paying attention, and use that information to begin taking advantage once again.

A healthy mindset, reliable obedience, accountability, & daily structure aren’t temporary systems that once achieved to the healthiest level, can then be brushed aside & no longer practiced.

Dog ownership is a lifestyle of sustained and consistent guidance.

So it’s not how we BEGIN the new journey. It’s how we CONTINUE living with the dog as a lifestyle. The key to being successful with your dog is by staying CONSISTENT, and practicing regularly on how to live life in the healthiest fashion.

15/06/2024

When we’re terrified of hurting our ill behaved dog’s feelings for doing something seriously wrong, we are unfortunately confused about what “happy” actually means, or looks like, for the dog.

I get it! I was one of those people!

Of course we all want our dogs to know NO discomfort, and to be as HAPPY as they seem to make us! But truly happy dogs—the ones that are emotionally stable, non-reactive, confident, and MANNERLY—aren’t created out of a void in rules or boundaries, or from having to do things that may not want to do.

So instead, we drown them in affection, grant them access to anything and everything they desire, and withhold all discipline, out of fear of crushing their fragile little spirits. Unfortunately this then creates the excessively nervy, obnoxiously entitled, intensely anxious, overly stressed, worry wort or megalomaniac, that is poorly behaved because they have no bounds.

When we are incapable of actually LEADING, or being firm when necessary, out of feeling guilt, remorse, mean, or too restrictive, our dogs suffer. They grow to become exponentially more ill-behaved, imbalanced, and unstable.

Overindulgence and excessive pampering is about YOU, not the dog. We do it because it makes US happy, all while our dogs slowly unravel over time. Intelligently examining the value behind sharing believable rules, benevolent leadership, and the intricate dance between both firm and soft instruction, will reveal what is necessary to help a dog be “completely” happy.

What we really need to do is take a hard look at what’s best for the dog, and not just what feels good to us.

14/06/2024

In a world saturated with polarization and discord, we humans find ourselves desperate to connect, to be loved, and to be seen. Instead of turning to each other for adoration, we turn to the next best thing — our furry friends. Overwhelmed and overworked, we lean heavily on our dogs to fill an emotional void that cannot be found from our human counterparts.

What’s wrong with this you ask...

Well, when our dogs personify so much more than simply being the family pet, Leadership, structure, and rules become nearly impossible to share. We see freedom, affection, and play as more vital than guidance or boundaries — forgoing the very thing that that makes our dogs most happy, balanced, and comfortable.

Our dogs need guidance and leadership as desperately as we humans feel the need to connect. So if we could put our selfishness aside for just a moment, and Lead our dogs just a bit more by prioritizing they be well mannered and respectful, then we would inevitably create the deeper connection we all so fiercely desire.

13/06/2024

Meet Penny, Peeps!

Could things get any Doodle’ier around here with all these floofs!

Who remembers Donny, the Dobie puppy from a bit back? Well this is his big Sis, from the same household!

Hard lessons from the past inspired Penny’s family to again reach out for training for their older lass, so that she’s on the same track as her well behaved bro.

Penny already knows all of our language and has a ginormous head start on all of the basics! With no major behavioral issues other than selective listening, all we will be doing is building reliability around some of her excitable triggers! We couldn’t be more happy about what’s to come for this pretty girl!

Stay tuned over on IG, to watch this girlie’s skillset soar!

13/06/2024

All that’s needed to create a complete monster of a dog is an owner that allows bad behavior to occur because they don’t KNOW any better, or FEELS MEAN for stopping it. Pair that with a dog that is keen on taking advantage of their owner’s ignorance or guilt, and BAM!

Terror.

By and large, there are two things consistently standing in the way of having a well behaved dog: EITHER an owner that has no way of “knowing” how to reinforce good choices, nor how to stop unwanted behavior, OR an owner that feels guilty or mean for stopping bad behavior, and therefore allows it to continue.

Regardless of naïveté or guilt, dogs will always pick up on their person’s hesitation, and will manipulate their own selfish outcome as a result.

Knowledge is out there. There’s no excuse for not knowing how to healthily live with a dog this day and age. Guilt, on the other hand, is a personal struggle, and one that requires some much needed introspection.

So you can thank your little terror of a dog for the gift they’ve presented to you. It’s time to take a deep dive into your internal psyche to work on what’s needed to reshape your current reality.

12/06/2024

Meet Finny, Peeps!

Don’t let this cute as can be Cavapoo, fool you! According to his owners, Finny’s is sweet as can be… when he wants to be. Demand nipping, snapping when being asked to move off of furniture, or to drop something he shouldn’t have, this kiddo has a serious case of entitlement! Add to that, this high strung boy has no off switch, and is deeply insecure.

Although Finny’s fam has a MAJOR head start on teaching him some of the basics, this kiddo’s privileged mindset is becoming questionable;)

So stay tuned as we help this lil man know his place within the family hierarchy, and to find peace of mind & some balance, so that they can all start living their best lives together.

12/06/2024

Want to know how to create a monster of a dog?

Well, you fawn over, you cajole, you dote, you shield, you appease, you enable, you bribe, you negotiate, you dismiss, and you prioritize giving, snuggling, and allowing—leaving you with an entitled, over-privileged tyrant, who assumes a guaranteed fulfillment of his own desires.

Without the counterbalance to our soft, caring encouragement—firm rules, tough direction when needed, and discipline for unacceptable behavior—we unwittingly pave the way for tyranny.

At the center of your universe, your spoiled dog now expects you (and everyone/everything else) to behave accordingly—complacent, remorseful, and submissive. And why would he presume any different? You’ve systematically perfected the recipe for a canine monster.

Balance is a necessary ingredient for harmony. Extremes on either end of the spectrum will produce a bitter discord.

11/06/2024

Time and again I hear complaints about how the dog throws up while driving, or the dog pants itself into hysteria while driving, or the dog trembles like the world is going to end while driving.

Mine… All 3 would bark in hysterics for the ENTIRE car ride. NOTHING soothed their anxiety.

Although these symptoms can be reeeeally annoying to experience each & every time you load up for a ride, what’s even more important to consider, is why it’s all happening in the first place.

Of course there are exceptions—some dogs do have motion sickness—but by and large, at least in my experience, STATE OF MIND is the culprit.

Funny thing happens when the dog comes into our program where mindset is managed and structure is implemented. We never even see or experience the drool pools.

So what is it that we are doing that helps alleviate these symptoms of distress?

It’s all in The Formula pinned to the top of this feed;) If you can follow this map to a healthier headspace, chances are your dog will only drool for that lick of ice cream you’ve got instead;)

11/06/2024

There is absolutely NOTHING WRONG with spoiling the shiitake out of your dog. That is, if you’re still capable of being firm & believable when necessary, and he listens!

I spoil my dogs mercilessly. Furniture privileges, organic raw-fed, homemade meals, homeopathic healthcare, bones, chews, toys, endless snuggles, vacations, you name it, they get it!

But they listen when I need them to. Well, Harlow is now deaf, so there’s that.

We don’t get to pick how our endless pampering will show up for our dogs. Depending on the genetic lottery your dog has been gifted, overindulgence paired with a lack of clear boundaries, and a underlying current of insecurity or stubbornness, can create the perfect storm for unbearable behavior.

For me, this created my worse case scenario: dog on dog attacks, lunging and snarling at strangers, car rides that would turn the perfectly sane, hysterical, lives confined to the house, fence fighting, resource guarding, incessant barking, high stress, and high anxiety. Constant yelling, frustration, headache, and an all out emotional breakdown, left me wondering where did it all go wrong.

These little monsters had it made, yet were still clearly unhappy.

Then a little light went off. What if my crew had to EARN all of these goodies? What if all of their actions were now based in PERMISSION-ONLY behavior? What if I prioritized respect before offering affection?

It was hard. But we did it. And my entire crew became truly happy and balanced.

So go ahead & spoil the shiitake out of your dog. Just become really clear on how it shows up for your dog, & dole it out appropriately;)

10/06/2024

Happy does not beget well behaved when it is the all encompassing priority.

As a matter of fact, when happiness takes on a fevered precedence over being “good”, we experience an intensification of anxiety, panic, entitlement, disrespect, dismissiveness, & even aggression.

We’ve all been here—Aiming for happy BEFORE prioritizing good.

But ensuring our dogs are always happy, or trying to love them harder, will not resolve their unhealthy behavioral issues.

Addressing them will.

This may not feel or look “cozy” at first. But discomfort is the genesis to change. There will be a period of adjustment and transition that doesn’t look or feel blissful.

REAL happiness is just around the corner. Promise.

Aim for good, first. Stability, freedom, and “happiness” will readily follow. Prioritize the opposite, and you’ll likely never see the good.

09/06/2024

“Love” and affection will not…

— Turn bad behavior into good behavior
— Turn disrespect into consideration
— Turn insecurity into confidence
— Turn reactivity into stability
— Turn aggression into passivity
— Turn untrustworthiness into reliability
— Turn hyperactivity into calmness

Unless of course, we’re capable of actually Leading, which includes sharing all the not-so-fun stuff that teaches a dog what NOT to do.

Worried about connection, bond, and relationship, we forfeit what’s actually necessary (clear rules & boundaries) for what can become a truly transformative relationship. Attempting to fix rotten behavior by “loving” our dogs more simply results in a worsening of our current issues.

If only affection, cuddles, treats, and toys were enough!

Instead, we need to think hard about what “love” truly entails — a more personalized, nuanced version with a balance of soft when earned, and stern when appropriately necessary.
OUR job is to know where our dog falls on the personality spectrum, in order to provide a very balanced approach to expressing our LOVE, and as a result, creating true happiness.

We can all LOVE our dogs better by Leading them more.

08/06/2024

We ALL have a choice.

We can make the choice to INTENTIONALLY guide & teach our dogs the necessary skills, mindset, and role they play in order to thrive and fulfill their highest potential…

Or

We can make the choice to relinquish our responsibility as owners, and as a result, become passive receivers of what life UNINTENTIONALLY teaches the dog.

The thing is, humans are terribly selfish. We refrain from doing anything that causes US discomfort or steals a bit of joy. Saying “no” or teaching what “isn’t” okay isn’t all that fun, so we forego this aspect of the learning process… and then simply let life do the honor of teaching what is, and what isn’t safe or practical.

When feelings of guilt, remorse, or pity dissuade us from offering firm instruction when necessary, our dogs ultimately suffer.

Although intentional guidance may not always be fun or enjoyable, it is absolutely necessary — That is, if we wish to offer our dogs a life of true freedom and inclusivity.

A lack of self-awareness, an unhealthy mindset, and poor training skills will always lead to a life less fulfilled. Locked away when guests come over, walks that become obsolete, getting hit by a car because the dog doesn’t come when called, or bites & warnings to humans that trespass the dog’s desires, are all results of life lived without benevolent, yet firm instruction. And so the dog falls victim to rehoming, or even worse, euthanasia.

We do ourselves and our dogs no favors by avoiding the responsibility of ownership which includes the uncomfortable—the not-so-fun stuff—that comes with having to say “no” on occasion.

Off-loading the responsibility of self-mastery onto the dog is selfish and careless. The bottom line is, this isn’t a DOG problem we’re seeing. This is a HUMAN problem. Easy to offload and blame the dog for being a derelict when we all should simply look in the mirror and claim our own responsibility.

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Opening Hours

Monday	06:00 - 18:00
Tuesday	06:00 - 18:00
Wednesday	06:00 - 18:00
Thursday	06:00 - 18:00
Friday	06:00 - 18:00
Saturday	07:00 - 16:00
Sunday	09:00 - 16:00

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http://www.PAWSitivelyCalm.com/

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