01/09/2022
Let me preface this post by saying how much I apologize for the lack of punctuation, but that's not what's important to me at this point. It's the context of the message and I think it's clear if you'll read to the end.
There has been a continual and steady physical decline that seems to be exponentially worse this past 2 months than any other time on my journey in so far as my medical condition this past 62+ years. It's been serious enough for me to have to make some hard choices. Harder than You may know, but I don't believe many of you are doubting how hard it is because I know who you are as people or you wouldn't be my friend in the first place.
I had to do what's best for HarmonyMansonDahmerVarmity yesterday and rehome her. Oh don't worry she's in a way better home than she had here and she's mine if I ever get to a place where I feel as if I can take care of her again but I can't and I know I won't.
That being said, the parakeet rehabber Leigh has agreed to allow me to bring Perry and Sherry back to her care because it's the same situation with them. I'm not able to care for them like I should be able to. It's not that they're suffering here, it's that I'm relying on other people in that respect and it's not their responsibility, it's mine and mine alone, and those little birds deserve better.
If I'm forced to do it I know for a fact that Bigly can go back home with Stephanie, and if she decides it's too much stress on her my friend John Robert Smith told me more than a year ago that if I ever need to find him a home because I'm unable and incapable of providing a good home for him that he would be willing to give Bigly a home at his house with his little wiener dog chico, and his cat Roscoe. I have no doubt and no questions about the fact that Bigly would forget about me in no time, and adjust quickly to surroundings where he had a big yard to run around in again and such and such.
I have Rae Charles to consider and I'm absolutely stumped in so far as what to do for him. I want to try as hard as I can to get resettled somewhere so I don't have to rehome him because he's going on 7 years old, he's absolutely blind, and he trusts no one to touch him save myself and Stephanie my helper.
If anyone would be willing to adopt Rae Charles and give him a high quality of life for his remaining years I would truly consider allowing him to go on the path that is best for him. I don't have any trouble taking care of him except for this fact that Stephanie has been scooping his box for me four times a week when she comes. I'm nearly incapable of doing that any longer. I can from time to time but it takes a monumental effort, and a full mornings worth of planning and trying to come up with the energy to do it.
That leaves me with Belle. I'm sure she would thrive anywhere else she went after a slight adjustment. I don't want to convince myself that she can't because I know better.
She's a particularly difficult dog to handle at times ... For everyone that she doesn't accept. That's everyone. LOL
If I can't find a suitable home for her if that's what the situation comes down to I will only have one option but to take her to the veterinarian and have her put to sleep because I know that's what they would end up doing with her at a shelter because of her particular personality type. People don't have time to work with dogs. They only have time to allow dogs to do what they have time for dogs to do.
Anyway my situation is becoming dire and I'm scared I'm going to have to go to the VA and apply for a room in the domiciliary so I can be around 24 hour medical care or at least within an arm's reach of it, and I'm more worried that if I go there they'll want to put me in the nursing home instead of allowing me to live in the domiciliary with the rest of the veterans on campus
Like I said if anyone would be willing to adopt a blind cat who is no trouble whatsoever as far as cats go I would be willing to allow Rae Charles to move along, so he can live with somebody who can scoop his box whether or not anybody else shows up on any particular day.
Hopefully if you're reading this and you know me you understand how difficult this truly is for me. I hope you also know how much I don't mind it being difficult for me as long as my animals are able to find somewhere safe where I will be guaranteed they won't be discarded like trash. And that goes for Belle too.
If anyone would be willing or interested in providing my 9 and 1/2-year-old Belgian malinois a good home, somewhere she can be a dog again instead of my slave I would be more than happy to pay you anything that I could afford. All of her dog tack will go along with her which has a value of more than $1,000 retail. A lot more than $1,000 retail. I made sure I spent money on things she needed before I'd buy my own food.
If nothing else, and if you happen to be local and interested in helping me foster my cat to see how things might work out before you have to take him to the animal shelter I would be willing to consider any option. I only want what's best for my critters.
This isn't a plea for pity and f**k you if that's what you think it is. This is my cry for help, and I don't know how to ask any other way than to be forthright about what's going on. I'm not able to care for my animals on my own any longer. That's what's going on.
I hope that clears up any further questions, and please feel free to hit me up on my messenger or you can call me on my phone at 423-676-2551 and I'll happily field your call. If you don't mind and decide to holler at me shoot me a text real quick so I'll know it's you and not be tempted to ignore the call.
And yes you can imagine the level of shame I feel for not even being able to keep my word to these little animals who have provided me with a quality of life I wouldn't have been able to find on my own. That's my issue now not theirs and I feel like I've used them in some way just to make me feel good. Maybe I have, but my willingness and ability to send Harmony off to a better home yesterday brought into clear focus for me the fact that I have the strength to do with best for them, so I'm hoping I can take solace in that fact as I face an uncertain, and terrifying future.