11/22/2025
When a pet owner willingly turns their animal over to a shelter or rescue, we call that an Owner Surrender.
People surrender pets for many reasons: behavior issues, pets not getting along, the puppy grew up, a new baby on the way, moving, “no time,” allergies… and on and on. And nine times out of ten, these issues could be resolved with a little time, effort, and guidance.
But too often, the owners who are quick to drop their pet off at a shelter are unwilling to try anything to fix the problem - nor do they recognize that they often play a major role in the issue. And far too often, the “problem” is simply an excuse.
Society makes it incredibly easy and even socially acceptable to “get rid of” your pet. But I often wonder if this happens because people don’t understand the heartbreaking reality of what surrender truly means for the animal… what it does to them emotionally.
If you’ve ever surrendered a family pet, you should know what happened after you walked away. And if you’re considering it, you should know the truth before you do.
This isn’t about how hard it is for you.
This is about them.
I challenge you to care enough to hear their side of the story. It’s a life-or-death decision.
First, understand this: dogs don’t want to be “bad.”
Behavior issues happen when their needs aren’t met, when training is inconsistent, or when we accidentally reinforce unwanted behavior.
Most issues?
They’re human-caused.
Are you really willing to dump your dog for something that is, in many cases, your responsibility to fix?
Even when the behavior is rooted in an abusive past, you still hold responsibility. You chose them. It’s your job to help them heal. Turning away from that? That’s on you too.
And then there are the other excuses…
A new baby.
No time.
They got too big.
They shed.
They bark.
They’re old.
The “new baby” excuse is especially painful. Why does having a new child mean abandoning the one who’s already there? You wouldn’t get rid of your first child when the second arrives. Your heart didn’t come with a one-slot limit.
Your pet just wants love.
Is that really too much to give?
But let’s talk about the dogs, because this is their story.
I’ve rescued many dogs: the neglected, the abused, the sick, the elderly, the forgotten. But some of the saddest dogs I’ve ever met were Owner Surrenders.
When a dog comes from a horrific place into a rescue or shelter, it’s Heaven to them. Warm beds, full bowls, gentle hands, kindness, play, safety, love.
But Owner Surrenders?
Their heartbreak is entirely different.
These are dogs who once lived as loved family members. They know what home felt like.
They remember it.
And when they’re suddenly left behind, they don’t understand.
They can’t understand.
And so they wait.
I call them “the waiting.”
They wait for their family to return.
They wait to go home.
They wait for the forever they were promised.
Every car door.
Every visitor.
Every walk past the kennels.
Every sound in the lobby.
They think it’s their family coming back.
In their eyes, there’s hope.
In their wagging tails, there’s belief.
In their little nighttime whimpers, there’s the slow realization that it might never happen.
Most surrendered dogs spend days — even weeks — convinced their family is coming back. Eventually, that certainty fades… until hope becomes dreams, and dreams become nightmares.
Some don’t know they’ve been abandoned. Others know the moment it happens.
Some dogs are physically dragged in as they resist with every ounce of their being. Their eyes beg for a second chance. They plead silently:
“Please don’t leave me.”
“You forgot me.”
“I can be better.”
“I’ll try harder.”
“Please take me home.”
And even after their family walks away… these dogs wait for them. Every day.
They scan every face.
They hope.
They wilt a little more each time they realize it isn’t them.
They walk back to their corner... head low, heart broken.... and repeat the cycle again tomorrow.
**In no-kill shelters, they may wait forever. In kill shelters, they may not get the chance.**
Strays get mandatory hold periods, giving owners time to reclaim them.
Owner Surrenders?
They can be euthanized the moment they’re dropped off.
And when space is tight, they are often the first to go.
They spend their final hours waiting for the people who left them there. They cry for the family who is not coming back.
You can blame the shelters if that’s easier, but they didn’t abandon your pet.
You did.
You handed over a loving, confused dog and said, “Here. You deal with this.”
And you walked away, telling yourself they’ll find a good home… while millions of dogs are euthanized in shelters every year.
Are you really willing to bet your dog’s life on the idea that they’ll be the exception?
If you feel guilty, good. You should.
Maybe you said, “I’m sorry,” before you left.
But your dog didn’t need an apology.
They needed commitment.
They needed love.
They needed you.
Because even after you surrender them, even after the fear, the confusion, the betrayal....they still love you.
They think of you every minute.
They wonder if you think of them.
They dream of you at night.
They wish for you with everything in them.
And they wait....
They wait until their very last breath. 💔
Even if they understood what you did, they would still love you anyway.
Think about that.
There may not be another soul in your entire life who loves you that unconditionally.
So if you have that kind of love…Fight for it.
💔 If you’re considering surrendering your dog because you feel overwhelmed, worried, or unsure how to meet their needs - please reach out before making that decision.
There are options.
There are solutions.
And I would be more than happy to help you navigate the behavior concerns, create a plan, or connect you with resources that can keep your dog safely in your home.
You don’t have to do this alone.
And your dog deserves every chance. 💞
© Charlotte's Behavior Corner
