09/14/2023
Before I had kids 😊
Do you have kids? I don't. So I hope you don't find my examples presumptuous.
If you've ever had a kid hopefully you've taken that baby to the doctor a few times in his or her life. You took her in for a vaccination or four, or maybe a check-up, and likely you've taken in a kiddo for a minor injury. Babies and kids, because of their age and sheer lack of life experience, just can't understand what's going on when mom and dad take them to the doctor. You've got to cradle them and hold them down for procedures that are scary and even cause pain. But why? Because it's for their good, right? You can't explain it to them then, but you do what is necessary to keep them safe and healthy and love them through their uncomfortable moments. It's one of those really helpless, terrible moments as a parent, isn't it?
Horsemanship can often have those moments. Moments in the process where the horse gets emotionally lost and you have to hold their hand tightly through it. You set the boundary and help them find their way back to comfort. You don't avoid the scary moment, and you do all you can to prepare them, but no matter how amazing the horse is or talented the horseman is, fearful moments will come and you'll have to work through them.
When possible you don't reward or release in a fearful/explosive/avoid frame of mind. You drift, maintain pressure to some degree, and release at the slightest try. Your attitude is of absolute importance, and the wrong attitude will throw the right strategies out the window.
Staying calm and encouraging when a horse blows up takes a fair amount of emotional fitness on your part, and that requires developing. We expect our horses to develop emotional fitness and learn to be brave and trusting, and so should we.
A parent doesn't (or shouldn't) think, "Don't be a scared little brat." when their baby is getting 4 vaccines in their little legs. We should take that same loving, encouraging frame of mind with horses and help them through their moments of fear, knowing it is for their benefit.