28/07/2025
The Day I Stopped 'Training' and Started Listening
You know that feeling when you're doing everything 'right' but your dog just won't cooperate?
The treats are high value. The timing is perfect. The technique is textbook.
Yet something feels... off.
You feel frustrated and tell your friends that you’ve never had such a stubborn dog before. The sting of failure settles in, and then you stop going for walks and hide away because you’re not good enough.
I so get it. Our first dog was the smartest, and I did not come close to understanding that back then. I was a cocky young adult 🤣 We attended class after class. He knew the skills, but he tired of commands. We were taught to “never let the dog win” back then.
I remember being up until 2 AM in a stand-off during practice on "down". Sweat poured off of my face, and finally, the minute he responded, I felt victory.
Man, the regret hit hard as I learned lesson after lesson with our dogs. We all share impactful moments like this, yet they appear differently for each of us.
Back then, I saw me vs. him. But he begged me to listen to his point of view. To see him. I didn't.
Eventually, I learned to communicate with animals. I apologized to this guy. His response? Laughter. That incident, he told me, shaped both our futures, just in different ways.
It’s tough to grasp while it's happening, but knowing that each experience shapes our future is essential in making peace with ourselves.
Today, I am not perfect. Not by a long shot. I've learned about perspective, and when I get caught up in a story, I narrow my perspective, disconnecting from the greater plan.
Looking back, I can see it so clearly now: Every time I focused on 'fixing', I broke something more valuable—our ability to honestly see each other.
Transformation began the moment I:
🐾 Stopped trying to control the outcome
🐾 Listened to my dogs by widening my perspective
🐾 Stayed curious
That's when my dog finally looked me in the eyes. Not for a reward. Not because I asked. But because we connected in a way that was real, raw, and full of love.