21/08/2021
So very true.....be present with who you are with, where you are and remember to look up, smile , take a deep breath and EXHALE 😉
Last night I lectured my ABC class about being present in your dog's life. What do I mean by that? I mean engage with your dog, be part of their lives, interact with them.
So often, we hike, run, bike, walk, participate in dog sports, and we don't engage with our dogs in any way. It's like pursuing parallel paths on different planes. That can be one of the greatest disconnectors we can create. If you need time to think when you're out on a hike, leash your dog. If something goes wrong on the agility field connect with your dog, reward them, engage with them while you stand there and think about what you did wrong, Don't just leave them hanging and owning your mistakes or your confusion. It breaks down your partnership and relationship.
Be present in everything you do with your dog, because the more you are present the more you build your relationship. The more you engage, play games, interact with them, do things with them as a unit and not as two individuals on separate paths, the more they will want to be with you; the more that relationship will grow. If dogs are left on their own, they will self entertain, it is how they are wired. They're not being defiant or willful or deliberately trying to vex you, they're just trying to have fun and entertain themselves - when you are mentally absent, they will move onto better things. The more they find to do without you, the more they will self-reward for disconnecting and the less value they will have for working with you.
If you are present and make yourself part of that entertainment all of a sudden wanting to be with you becomes the most rewarding thing. Dogs who chase wildlife, who get stressed working or playing on the agility field, who pull on a leash or don't seem to want to be out with their owners, are all dogs who don't have the benefit of a strong relationship. They haven't learned that engaging with their human and doing fun things with them, is the most rewarding thing, so they have found their own entertainment. Building a relationship means interaction, showing up, working as a team, having each others backs and being partners in everything you do. That doesn't mean you can't take time out to think, work, or do your own thing, but it should be the exception and not the rule. If your dog has a tendency to stray, take that time to put them on a leash so that they're safe and with you while you let your mind wander.
Today I was hiking with the dogs, and my mind was back in my office thinking about what I needed to do. Sweep, my youngster, was running up and down the trail and beginning to lose his mind, riding his runner's endorphin high. He caught my attention when he dove off the trail and headed down to the raging creek below, without my permission. I realized at that point I was completely disconnected from my entire pack. I called him in, and gave him a trail time-out behind me. A few minutes later, I released him to go back out and play but I began to engage with him the entire time. I imagined a bubble around me and tried to keep him within that area. Any time he reached the edge of the bubble, I would call him back and have a party when he'd returned. I kept talking to him, verbally rewarding him anytime he was close. As the miles ticked along, he began to stop on his own as he reached the edge of the bubble and look over his shoulder at me. Every time I would reward him and have a huge party showering him with praise and affection. I used very few treats, but made sure he knew by my actions, voice and, words, that I was thrilled with what he was doing. The harder he tried, the better he got, and the more praise and reward he got from me. By the end of our hike he was walking with me and the other dogs and only occasionally trotting about 15 feet ahead before coming back to walk with us. He was happy, relaxed, and fully engaged with me and the rest of the pack. The effort I put in was minimal, but the rewards that I reaped were enormous.
I challenge you to be present, be mindful, engage with your dog, build that relationship, be there for them and make your time with them really count. They're never with us long enough and the more you put in, the more you'll get out. Dogs are a product of what we invest in them. The better the relationship you have with your dog, the more full and meaningful the years you have together will be. Yes life is busy, yes we get distracted, that's normal, but if you own a dog, you already have the best therapy you can find so embrace it, immerse yourself in it and enjoy the kind, loving, brilliance and unconditional love a dog can bring us.
Be present!
