The Paid Pup: Modern Dog Learning & Advocacy

08/05/2025

Just Rilo being ridiculously adorable. 🖤
Description: A Photo of a small white and brown chihuahua type dog in a dog car seat in the car. His paws are placed on top of the seat and he’s partially standing up and looking back at the camera with big eyes and floppy ears.

01/05/2025

It’s wild to want any being in your life to be obedient to you.

Flaunting how you can command your dog into arbitrary behavior isn’t impressive, and you look like an absolute tool.

Who else in your life do you expect this kind of behavior from? 🤔

There’s a Venn diagram somewhere with obedience obsessed trainers, Andrew Tate fans, and booklickers for colonialism. 🤮

If this is the kind of relationship you want with your dog (or anyone)—it’s time to look inward and do some soul-searching.

[Description: Words on a red background that say: Hot take (with fire emojis): It’s wild to want any being in your life to be obedient to you.]

30/04/2025

A modern dog behavior professional doesn’t just care about teaching dogs cues—they prioritize the overall experience of both human and dog during each appointment.

In a therapy setting, this is called a Corrective Emotional Experience (CCE), and it’s a powerful way to affect change and promote healing in both humans and dogs.

I learned about this concept when I finally (after a long line of ill-matched therapists) met my current therapist of eight years. Her style allowed me to reframe, grow, and break patterns I thought were impenetrable.

 She only recommended books or exercises if asked, and she never rushed me, lectured, or wielded power—I felt like an equal.

She observed and listened, and for one of the first times in my life I felt seen and heard.

 Wait, what? My feelings weren’t “wrong”? Not only were they not wrong—they were valid?

 My mind was blown.

This idea perfectly translates to the relationship between dog behavior professionals and dogs and their guardians.

When people seek help from a dog behavior professional, they’re usually at the end of their proverbial rope. With frustration, exhaustion, self-doubt, and a myriad of other emotions spilling over—they come to us in a vulnerable state.

They need to be heard and validated for what they’re going through—so does their dog.

While most dog behavior professionals aren’t credentialed therapists, the last thing we want for each being in our practice is to pile on additional trauma. We never know what someone is struggling with, especially in relation to their dog’s struggles. And I’d argue our job is pretty aligned with therapy in many ways.

Deeply buried trauma can burst forth when faced with a dog whose behavior is turning your world upside down (can confirm).

During our appointments, we have a chance to start rewiring negative emotional experiences for both species around learning, support seeking, confidence, trust, safety—and much more—just by being an emotionally safe person who listens and validates, and does not use punishment, shame, guilt, or other icky tactics to work either either human or dog. 

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11/04/2025

Is “balanced” dog training a
GRIFT?

Here are some key components that constitute a grift:

1. Establishing false credibility
Grifters portray themselves as highly knowledgeable or uniquely skilled by regularly posting social media content with an air of authority—even if not backed by genuine expertise.

2. Social proof & popularity
The grifter uses follower counts, likes, comments, or fake testimonials to create the illusion that many others trust them.

3. Emotional manipulation & storytelling
They regularly share emotional narratives designed to elicit fear, hope, or urgency, which makes followers more open to persuasion.

4. Strategic use of visual content
They use carefully curated images or videos portraying idealized outcomes, “impressive” results, or dramatic before and afters to attract followers and enhance their “authority”.

5. Suppressing critical voices
Grifters on social media often delete negative comments and block dissenting opinions. They publicly dismiss critics as jealous or uniformed.

6. Fake or misleading expertise
They often reference vague credentials, certifications, or affiliations without verification, creating a false sense of knowledge and expertise.

7. Reliance on testimonials instead of evidence
Grifters heavily use emotional stories and anecdotal “success” rather than evidence based, peer-reviewed studies.

8. Promising quick fixes or guaranteed results
They offer unrealistic promises about how rapidly they can come to the rescue and solve victims’ problems while dangling the carrot of long lasting, guaranteed results.

9. Dismissing harm or danger
Grifters often minimize harm by dismissing risks as rare or insignificant, shifting blame to victims, and reassuring them to suppress caution and critical thinking.

10. Significant consequences
Victims of grifts often experience significant emotional and financial consequences. They can have feelings of shame, betrayal, anxiety, guilt, and reduced self-worth. The fallout from being on the receiving end of a grift is far-reaching and can lead to long lasting psychological distress.

What do you think—is “balanced” dog training a grift?

Tell me what you think!

cont. below

26/03/2025

I think this piece will be deeply relatable to a lot of people.

The reality Rilo and I been living in for seven months

26/03/2025

This was cathartic to write, and I think many of you will deeply relate.

Here are some excerpts:

“Rilo is clever and hilarious. He’s playful and affectionate. In many ways he is my dream dog—agile yet sturdy, active and up for anything, but also willing to rest. He is utterly loveable, but he is suffering—and trying to help him is an agonizing exercise in understanding my own needs and limitations and diving deep to get to the bottom of his.”

“My brain spends many hours of the day in a hamster wheel, spinning and churning, desperately searching for answers. I think about his genetics, early life experiences before he came to me, and possible pain and discomfort in his body. Something is there, lurking beneath the surface of skin and bone, firing off signals that tell him he is always in danger.”

“The realities of living with a dog like Rilo are rarely talked about.

The grueling medication schedule that rules your day to day. The maze of fences and baby gates to keep everyone safe. The grief and emotional toll of loving a dog who is unable to fall asleep snuggled next to you. The contagion of hypervigilance that leads to your own nervous system responses and starts affecting your day to day stress levels. The draining bank account and loaded credit cards. The hours reading and emailing and working with professionals who you want definitive answers from, but rarely get—a maddening irritation that festers.“

Clickable link to read in stories.

https://open.substack.com/pub/michellereindal/p/chaos-and-compassion-the-agony-of?r=179hmq&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

[Description: A light green background with the title of the substack post: Chaos and Compassion: The Agony of Living with a Dog Who Bites, the Reality Rilo and I have been living in for seven months.]

23/03/2025

Consent-based care isn’t optional. It’s everything. And last week, someone I trusted chose to ignore it.

My beautiful, gentle 14-year-old Percy came home from his groomer shaking. She claims to use a force-free, stress-free approach. She does not.

Percy is deaf. He's partially blind. He's frail. And yesterday, someone I trusted to care for him with compassion chose to do the exact opposite.

I can't stop thinking about how scared he must have been.

Here's the thing about operating without force or fear - either you're doing it, or you're not. There's no middle ground. There's no "consent-based and compassionate, except when I'm annoyed or want to get the job done quickly."

We had discussed his boundaries extensively. He doesn't like his paws touched. His nails are sensitive. His muzzle and private areas are off-limits.

She knew I'd rather he come home half groomed than been forced through anything.

She KNEW all this.

And yet, for whatever reason, she did the opposite.

She shaved his entire muzzle. Shaved his private areas. Shaved his feet and clipped his nails. All the things we had explicitly agreed she would NOT do if he showed any discomfort.

To do this she would have HAD to restrain him, to force him, to subjugate him to a process that would have petrified him.

This wasn't an accident. This wasn't a miscommunication. This was a choice.

A choice to prioritize her process over my elderly dog's emotional wellbeing.

A choice to ignore his boundaries because they were inconvenient.

A choice to send a message: "Your dog's comfort doesn't actually matter to me, even though I pretend it does."

When a groomer, vet, trainer or any professional who works with dogs puts the end result above the emotional journey to get there, they are failing that dog.

Full stop.

I would rather have the scruffiest dog in town than know my boy spent even one minute feeling afraid and helpless while someone forced procedures on him.

I'm devastated that I couldn't protect him from this.

That someone who used all the right words - "low stress," "positive," "force-free" - chose to do the exact opposite the moment it became challenging.

When we talk about "consent-based care" for dogs, some people roll their eyes. "It's just a dog," they say. "Sometimes you have to just get things done."

But if you've ever looked into the eyes of a dog who trusts you completely to keep them safe... if you've ever felt the weight of that responsibility... you know.

You know that "just getting it done" isn't good enough. Not even close.

I don't care how perfect a groom looks if it came at the cost of my dog's dignity and trust.

I don't care how convenient it is to force a dog through a procedure instead of taking the time to build trust.

I don't care what anyone thinks about being "precious" with my dog's boundaries.

Because at the end of the day, I'm all Percy has. I'm his voice. I'm his advocate. And I failed him by trusting someone who used kindness as a marketing slogan rather than a genuine commitment.

To every professional working with dogs:
Words matter. Promises matter. But your actions matter most.

If you claim to be "low stress", "no fear" or "force free," but get frustrated when a dog doesn't comply, you're not what you claim to be.

If you advertise gentle handling but prioritize efficiency over emotional wellbeing, you're not what you claim to be.

If you think a result justifies trauma to get there, you're not what you claim to be.

All our dogs deserve better. They deserve practitioners who truly understand that consent isn't optional - it's everything.

You have the right to demand that of every professional in your dog's life.

Percy deserved better. And I'll spend every day making sure he never experiences anything like that again.

Because real love means respecting boundaries, even when it's inconvenient.

Real care means prioritizing emotional wellbeing over results.

Really working without fear isn't just marketing - it's a promise you keep even when no one is watching.

If the process isn’t kind, the result doesn’t matter.

31/12/2024

It’s no secret that Rilo and I have been struggling.

When I first adopted him he was fearful and anxious around new people, especially masculine presenting folks—even just walking past them on the street was too much for my guy.

This kind of behavior wasn’t new to me and I felt confident that we’d get through it, and we did.

He’s made tremendous headway in his everyday confidence and recovery skills. He is playful and smart and loves learning.

In September, his behavior took a turn. His hypervigilance increased tenfold, he couldn’t relax in the evenings, and the most challenging of all—he began attacking me.

Yes, attacking. It’s a big word, but it’s the only way to describe what has been happening in our home in a way that most will understand.

It first started when he was somewhat relaxed or asleep, even if he was on the opposite end of the couch as me, if the couch moved slightly, he’d launch out of sleep biting at my hands multiple times.

We put management in place, got a veterinary behaviorist on board, and have been trialing medications.

With all of this in place, attacks still happened and are continuing to happen. Twice recently he has approached and clearly asked for pets (I stay up near his neck and away from his back end with several consent checks), and while still consenting he has gone into attack mode.

He’s been in and out of the vet to assess his pain—which is likely the cause of the attacks. Poor guy. He likely has a chronic form of IVDD, but we have no done imaging, which is next. We need to see what’s going on in his body so I can help him get out of pain.

The way we’ve been living for the past four months is not sustainable and both of our qualities of life are suffering.

I don’t feel safe in my own home. Rilo is clearly in immense pain. We need answers.

As a single pet parent and small business owner, navigating this on my low income has nearly broken me financially and emotionally.

Please help if you can. Share if you can. For me and my guy. ❤️

Link to go fund me in bio and here:
https://gofund.me/9aa58695

Thank you so much.