29/07/2020
Read what happened to my friend Bob...we have our routines, they cannot be broken, please remember that...my momma remembers our routines, we have a great momma...poor Bob, but I know he will be OK, his momma wasn't feeling good but I hope she doesn't do that to him again
Dearest friends on the internet,
I hope this message finds you happy and healthy! All is well here. The woman is feeling better and has only taken sinus meds one time today. That is progress!
I will say that I’m a bit miffed at the woman. I am going to give her a pass this time because she had such a rough day yesterday but...she has completely shirked her duties today. I mean, the entire day started off wrong because of her. You see, we have a routine before every meal. She distracts all of the vile beasts by feeding them their meal first in the kitchen. I stand quietly in the dining room until she comes to serve me whatever it is she has prepared for me. She sets the food down and...now, this is the critically important part...then she picks me up, flips me over on my back, and kisses me 14 times on my belly. Not 13 times. Not 15 times. It must be exactly 14 kisses on the fluffy part of my belly. As she is kissing, I stretch both my front and hind legs as far out as they will go. Once this important part of the process is complete, then and only then can I begin eating.
Well, this morning I did my part. I waited patiently in the dining room for our ritual to begin. She walked in, slapped the food down, and then walked away. I was stunned and so upset that I could not eat. I still don’t think she is aware of what she has done.
I am going to spend the rest of the evening meditating my way out of the funk this episode has left me in.
I hope you all will go right this minute and wash your hands. This virus situation is serious. Please make sure you have your face mask on at all times when you cannot socially distance yourself. If any of you get sick, I will go into an even deeper funk and we just don’t have time for that.
Very truly yours,
Bob