13/11/2024
In contrast to yesterdayâs post of the mindlessness of constant chatting and patting, this one is going to veer into the other ditch. If youâre paying attention, youâll see that like so much in life, our horsemanship is probably best if we just keep steering ourselves resolutely down the middle.
If yesterdayâs post received any criticism, it was to say that I mustnât believe in giving thanks.
Not at all. While I am not a fan of nervous fussing, I think we all should want to be friends with our horses. I especially think there should be more petting of them in movement, while weâre in the saddle. It does much to reassure a horse, particularly along the crest of the neck and down over the croup.
So, no, donât be afraid to say thank you. To say, âGood job!â To give the break, with heartfelt gratitude. To loosen the reins. To allow the rest. To stroke the quarters while riding⌠which, again, most horses prefer to the neck. To soften, to show kindness and empathy. To step down and loosen the cinch, or girth.
To remember to acknowledge the other who makes it all possible.
We women, especially, can be unsure when it comes to praise. We wonder, how much is too little, how much is too much? We want to be effective and smart. Weâve maybe been told that weâre too wishy-washy, that weâre too loud or too busy, or too tentative or too hurried, that we get in the way of the horse. This, so often by male gurus.
Weâre always too much of something, it seems.
We toughen up. We buckle on our spurs. We go out and lope or canter the circles, we âbridle upâ the horse. We do as weâre told, for weâre by God, serious horsewomen. We somehow decide somewhere along the way that it is a weakness to give thanks, until the lesson, or the big show, is over. Until we are safely alone.
Often, when I am teaching, I will actually have to tell the student to praise the horse.
âPet her,â I will say and it isnât unusual for the more aspiring riders to ignore this bidding! I take note and actually repeat this, more clearly, because it is a telling thing when a rider cannot say thank you for a good and honest effort. I know for a fact that these riders love their horses but it is a very common thing, this inability to soften while on the job.
Children, on the other hand, are usually very good at this. They are more at home with living in their hearts, even when they are being watched.
In alignment with yesterdayâs post, Iâm still saying to you, pay attention. Just be mindful of the good effort, even if it was too little, or too late. Donât forget to soften your face into a gentle smile, to lift up your heart and be joyful.
We are so fortunate to have horses in our lives!
We can be soft and quiet at the same time we praise the horse. This, I think, is called prayer.
