13/01/2025
Understanding the reason for bad behaviour is always important, hearing what the animal has to say and dissecting what is said and how it is said is vital. It takes experience in both behaviour and communication to achieve the desired results, but it is also important to always remember that they are still animals at the end of the day, my success rate is 95% for behavioural issues, purely because some behaviours can never be changed, whether it is a breed specific behaviour or natural instinct, the pet parent not being willing to change or take advice, or simply that too much expected from the animal.
Dearest little Skimmel is a gorgeous little girl whose parents were quite desperately looking for assistance because Skimmel was pooping on the kitchen counter. For obvious reasons, this was a major problem, and it was important to rectify the issue as soon as possible. I had worked with her mom before on a different case and knew that she would take my advice and follow through with recommendations – the parents must be willing to assist as needed.
The first thing that came through was the fact that she wanted to be “seen” by the other cats in the household. Even though she accepted that she was pretty, the tone of her voice lacked self-confidence, which, in turn, led to her body language not relaying accurately to the other cats.
*Tell me about yourself?
"I think I am pretty, but no one sees it"
*I do, you are very pretty, and your mom and dad know you're pretty, don't you think that's all that matters?
"No, I also want the others to"
*Well, sometimes other cats are in their own world.
*How do you feel about the others?
"I don't get a chance to be nice"
*So, you have tried?
"I have"
*I am so sorry to hear that. It must be difficult.
"It makes me sad"
I also picked up that the other cats were most likely bullying her (she would not confirm this), or she just did not feel safe going into the garden to do her peeps and poops. Going on top of the counter gave a perfect vantage point to look out for possible threats – almost like human battles fought on a high vantage point.
Normally I will think of the approach that I will take as the session starts and gauge how and what is said. I decided to help build her confidence and teach her how to positively interact with the other cats in the household.
*… you need to accept that you are worthy and important. Never let others see you otherwise, show them you are absolutely awesome! Can you try that?
"I can try, I don't know if I can"
*We all know you can, you just need to believe it and it will be true.
*And besides, if you feel worthy and important then they will want to be nice to you. Some animals can be mean if another one feels sad and weak, but if you are happy and know you are important and worthy then you will gain the respect of the others. It's really sad that some animals and even people are like that, but it's an unfortunate reality of life. Do you understand?
"I think I do"
I then explained hygiene to her as well as the consequences of bad hygiene. And I recommended that 2 litterboxes be added, the next day I got pictures of two new, fancy litterboxes. We allowed her to choose where she would want the main one to be. She said the “far place” for the one – and we had no idea where that could be, so it was a guess in the end.
The first night, there was an “oopsie” on the counter and I gently reminded her again about hygiene and to work on speaking to the other cats. Her mom decided to move one litterbox to a different “far place” where Skimmel was sleeping the next day.
That would be the last oopsie she had – her mom, dad and I were so incredibly proud of her, and she was constantly reminded about that. On the third night I decided to deliberately not do a check-in (some animals will push their luck if they think I’m not involved anymore) and still, no oopsies. Skimmel was doing the work, and she was progressing at a rapid rate.
I received constant videos of her interactions with the other cats, and it just got better and better. When I would chat with her, I would give her advice about how to speak to the other cats. And as her confidence grew, her body language changed, and she was getting more and more relaxed.
It’s always so fulfilling when an animal shows growth and willingness to work to improve, they usually know that it is to help them. But it needs to be a healthy balance of expectation vs what the animal is able to accomplish.
I hope that Skimmel’s self-confidence keeps growing, this pretty, amazing little girl has made everyone so proud.