The Polite Dog

23/02/2025

Dogs don’t use force to teach each other. So why are they telling you to?

Balanced trainers, those who use both positive reinforcement and punishment through pain or fear, often claim that prong collars, shock collars, and leash pops mimic how mother dogs “correct” their puppies.

They say that because dogs sometimes growl or muzzle-grab, using force is just “speaking their language.”

This is not backed by scientific evidence or research, and it’s not even a logical argument.

Here’s what the research actually shows:

Dogs avoid physical conflict whenever possible, using body language, vocalizations, and space to communicate.

They aren’t shocking or pinning each other to “teach respect.”

When mother dogs do intervene with puppies, it’s brief, controlled, and non-damaging; nothing like the repeated and sustained pain of a prong collar correction or an e-collar shock.

Studies show that dogs trained with aversive methods exhibit higher stress levels, more fear-based behaviors, and a greater risk of aggression.

Aversive training does not enhance learning, it inhibits it and suppresses behavior through fear, which is fundamentally different from how dogs naturally communicate.

Imagine stubbing your toe hard on a table leg, and right at that moment, someone demands you solve a math problem. Are you focused on learning, or are you just trying to deal with the pain? That’s what happens when dogs are corrected with pain, they aren’t learning a lesson, they’re just trying to avoid the next hit.

When humans deliver corrections through pain or intimidation, research shows that dogs do not respond as if they are receiving a “natural consequence.”

Instead, they exhibit increased stress behaviors, avoidance, and even defensive aggression - reactions that are starkly different from how puppies respond to natural maternal guidance.

When corrected by their mother, puppies typically adjust their behavior without signs of fear or distress, as maternal cues are brief, controlled, and non-threatening.

This contrast suggests that dogs perceive human-imposed corrections not as meaningful communication, but as unpredictable, aversive events.

If corrections really worked like dog-to-dog communication, we wouldn’t see so many side effects. Yet study after study shows that dogs trained with force are more anxious, less engaged, and more likely to react aggressively.

So why do some trainers keep pushing this claim? The answer is simple: it provides a convenient justification for using outdated, harmful methods that prioritize control over effective and humane communication.

That trauma may not always be immediately obvious, but research shows it can manifest in chronic stress, anxiety, and behavioral fallout, undermining a dog’s well-being long after the training session ends.

And I don’t say this to stir controversy, but to inform the public: a trainer calling themselves “balanced” is openly admitting to a lack of modern, science-based knowledge. The industry has moved forward, but they haven’t.

Dogs learn best through trust, not fear.

The best trainers in the world don’t rely on intimidation, they rely on knowledge, skill, and ethical communication that affirms the dogs emotional state at all times.

There will no doubt be upset balanced trainers in the comments, but pay attention, because while they may resort to insults or deflections, they won’t provide p*er-reviewed evidence to support their claim.

The question now is not whether this myth is false, but whether we will finally move beyond it and do right by the dogs and the public who trust us.

Sources:
1. Herron, M. et al. (2009). Survey of the use and outcome of confrontational and non-confrontational training methods in client-owned dogs showing undesired behaviors.
https://doi.org/10.1016/j.applanim.2008.12.011
2. Ziv, G. (2017). The effects of using aversive training methods in dogs – a review.
https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jveb.2017.02.004
3. Vieira de Castro, A.C. et al. (2020). Does training method matter? Evidence for the negative impact of aversive-based methods on companion dog welfare.
https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0225023
4. Lezama-García, K. et al. (2019). Maternal behaviour in domestic dogs.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6776987/
5. Blyth, T. (n.d.). If a mother dog snaps at her pups, why can’t we use ‘corrections’ to train?
https://www.tarynblyth.co.za/post/if-a-mother-dog-snaps-at-her-pups-why-can-t-we-use-corrections-to-train

27/12/2024

Electric collars rely on pain or fear to suppress unwanted behaviours. They deliver an electric stimulus that is intentionally unpleasant to deter the dog from repeating the behaviour. For the dog to associate the discomfort with their actions, the sensation must be sufficiently aversive to create a negative emotional response, such as fear, anxiety, or pain. Without this emotional impact, the dog is unlikely to alter their behaviour, as there would be no motivation to avoid the stimulus.

22/12/2024

For everyone that has welcomed a new family member or are helping out your local rescue at this time of year.....
Too much too soon WILL cause issues.
It is a really common occurrence with newly adopted dogs.
Congratulations on your new dog.
I know you want to take them to the beach, the pet store and your café....however can I ask for a few minutes so I can explain just what your dog has gone through.....and why you need to take the next few weeks SLOW.
Your new dog has had it's whole world turned upside down.
They don't know you.
They don't know if they can trust you.
They don't know if they are with you for an hour or forever.
They may have been in various scary places.
Other houses, rescues, the pound and likely ALL of these in the past few days or weeks.
Your dog has stress hormones surging through their brain, they are STRESSED....they need to decompress, they need STABILITY in their environment and from you.
They need time with you and their new environment.
They need to know that the tree outside may rustle against the house and that's OK.
They need to know that those normal creaky noises in your house are OK and that at 3.45 the neighbours bang their door shut.
They need to know when it rains that tapping sound is OK.
They need to know that when the door opens they won't be moved somewhere else again.
They need to trust that YOU are safe even when you have had a bad day, you will still give them food and that they can close their eyes around you.
You know what your good intentions are with your new dog, your dog however has NO idea what is happening.....only that everything has changed and it is scary.
They do NOT need other new environments yet. Take it SLOW.
Dogs that have just been adopted need TIME. There is no need to rush out the next day and take them to all the places you want to go with them.....They need the opposite.
Let them decompress, let them inspect a new area of your house or yard every day or two. Walk them up and down outside your house for a few days (and only there), let them sniff, and sniff some more. Let them p*e freely.....it may be boring for you, but not for your dog. They need to know what is happening around them and they learn that through their nose, eyes and ears.
They NEED this.
They need to learn to TRUST you.
The long walks can wait, the café will still be there in a few weeks and you can visit the pet shop alone until they are ready.
Your bond together is the MOST important thing to concentrate on right now.
You will never regret taking it slow and it can save your dog and yourself from making the very same mistakes that can lead to people rehoming in the first place.
All the very best with your new dog.

17/12/2024

13/09/2024

04/09/2024

Grumble and Growl Zones. Do you have a child and a dog? Or are you expecting and have a dog in your home already?

Check out this Family Paws handout and see if you can recognise the potential grumble and growl zones in your home

12/08/2024

💪⚡This is a piece of information that will keep you from banging your head against a wall over and over again and this knowledge can really help ALL dogs.
Reactive dogs.✅
Anxious dogs✅
Over excited dogs✅
I know the terminology used by some in the industry is complicated (esp if you are just beginning to help your dog through this difficult time) and this page will always try to break down often difficult/complex issues so they can be more easily understood.
Understanding this concept will change how you work with your reactive dog.

Many clients attempt desensitisation work or begin counter conditioning when their dog is already over their threshold and the trigger is way too close.
We cannot dictate where to start this work....your dogs body language will let you know.
If your dog needs 20 metres from another dog to be at a 2 - 3 great !
If they need 50 metres from a trigger to be at a low level, then insisting on a closer interaction will not help them, they decide what is too close to a trigger, not us.

Distraction is NOT a long term solution for reactivity.....it sometimes has its place, but hiding and distraction are very temporary "solutions”.
If you have a reactive dog, there is hope, you can do this!

🙂Unmarked graphics are available for $ 1.20 USD or $ 2 NZD each (approx), these are then able to be used off Facebook for client handouts, posters etc. Please visit ABC Dogs Patreon Shop for our collection of graphics.
Everyone is free to share these posts on social media, however off social media use is protected.
Screen shots are a violation of copyright.
Please respect that these graphics take time and effort to make . All graphics belong to ABC Dogs NZ and are under copyright.

06/08/2024

Fear is the easiest things to condition in dogs and the hardest to resolve. Fear can come from many places, many of which we don't control. This infographic is my most downloaded and shared resource. In fact, many vets and Veterinary Behaviorists use this handout with their own clients! Link in first comment to grab your own copy.

15/07/2024

Cognitive dysfunction can affect senior and geriatric dogs. Here are the signs to look for.

11/07/2024

Though it may seem like a fun thing for kids, dogs are NOT meant to sit on. EVER!!! Please do not ever encourage a child to sit or step up on a dog. This can cause pain, fear and conflict. All can increase the chances of a dog bite.

Is your dog “tolerating” what is happening in a situation? Or is the dog really telling them they're uncomfortable and want this to stop? We encourage families to observe their dog's body language so that they can understand what their dog is telling them.

How do I know what to look for if they’re uncomfortable?
❗Half moon eyes, your dog is leaning their body away from what is going on,
❗Yawning when they aren’t tired
❗lip licking

There are many body language signals that dogs display to us if they are uncomfortable, and even if they are enjoying something. Dogs use their bodies to communicate discomfort, stress and joy. Maybe they are happy and content and come over to you while you are holding your baby and get some pets, or they are happily wagging their tail with a loose body.

Recognizing how your dog uses their body to communicate is an important way to build and strengthen bonds. Looking for more information? Join us on July 18 at 7pm ET/4pm PT for Dogs & Toddlers webinar taught be a licensed Family Paws Parent Educator! This is perfect for those whose baby's who are becoming more mobile (crawling, walking and all those exciting milestones!). We have some wonderful ways to safely include your family dog in this journey. Sign upbit.ly/registerdogstoddlers

03/07/2024

This is one that needs to be put to bed once and for all. It pains me to think of all the dogs who suffer unnecessarily because of the prevalence of this myth.

If you are afraid of something and someone hugs you and comforts you with gentle words, does that make you more afraid? Of course not. It helps calm you and makes you feel better.

So, let's keep this in mind as the US heads into the holiday and all the scary booms.

COMFORT YOUR DOG.
COMFORT YOUR DOG.
COMFORT YOUR DOG.
COMFORT YOUR DOG.
COMFORT YOUR DOG.

Stay safe.

28/06/2024

Dogs kept as pets have restricted control over their lives, as they are subject to the decisions and regulations of their owners.

Their activities, diet, and socialisation are all managed by their owners. When we keep dogs, we need to meet their natural needs to ensure their physical and mental wellbeing. Meeting their natural needs helps to provide them with a sense of security and comfort, reducing stress and anxiety, as well as preventing boredom by providing them with physical and mental stimulation.

23/06/2024

As a licensed Family Paws Parent Educator and a certified behavior consultant whose speciality is fear and aggression, I work with a lot of families with dogs and kids. Often I'll get called when the baby is approaching toddlerhood and the dog is struggling. Many families are surprised at this because often the dog was comfortable during infanthood but then struggles during toddlerhood as the child gain mobility and independence. Let's be proactive not reactive. Plan ahead to keep everyone safe and prepared.

If you are expecting, I recommend scheduling my one-on one pre-baby or toddler prep session: https://rescuedbytraining.com/project/pre-baby-toddler-prep/ to help set you and your dog up for success.