06/07/2025
So true, if I had a dollar for every time I had to go over the importance of rules and boundaries.
It's like people struggle to believe that creating leadership in the home is the answer but it is in most cases.
It really isn't hard having a well behaved dog, dogs are generally pretty simple with their needs. They love consistency, structure, rules and a stable leader.
Everything outside of that they dislike. How do you know if your dog is not happy? I've listed some thing's you will see in your dog if they aren't happy:
Barking
Separation Anxiety
Reactivity
Aggression
Digging
Escaping
Pacing
Chasing cars
Chasing flies, butterflies, shadows, birds
Ball obsessed
Shaking
Paw clicking
Skin problems
Eating socks, rocks, sticks, tissues
Can't sit still or remain calm or switch off
Phobia's (Car,storm etc)
Overly territorial, aggression at the front door.
Excitement at the front door.
Pulling on lead
Any dog that is bouncing of the walls all day, cannot stay still and get long periods of good quality sleep while humans are present are struggle and not happy.
If you dog lives in an environment where the humans are stressed, anxious, yelling at each other, carry negative energy, get easily frustrated. Your dog is not happy.
Also, I do not care if your dog is from a puppy farm (backyard breeders), rescue or any other excuse people like to use. Being a rescue doesn't determine how that dog develops. It's who rescues the dog that makes all the difference.
Always a tough conversation and most people like the easy fluffy stuff but for those that are willing to work and make personal changes. You will see the magic happen!
Are there other components?
Of course.
Play, affection, exercise. But these are all enjoyable and rewarding for the human — so you don’t need me or any other trainer to remind you to do this stuff. You’ll happily do it without anyone nagging you.
But, the other stuff? The rules, the structure, the accountability? Bleh.
This stuff is no fun. In fact, it’s often emotionally uncomfortable. And so it gets placed in the very back of the mind’s priority list.
Which means the dog’s needs get the usual out of balance treatment.
Our dogs get the play, affection, and exercise — aka, the soft, fun, sweet stuff, and little to none of the other stuff that balances them and your relationship out. Which means owners get the usual out of balance dog behavior, AND as a special bonus they get the usual out of balance relationship dynamics… which only serves to exacerbate their dog’s behavior issues.
You see, it’s a double pronged undermining. You not only withhold the essential stuff that helps your dog share their best, you also teach your dog that you’re a doormat to be walked upon.
And I’m sure you can see where that all ends up. It ends up with you sitting on mine, or another trainer’s couch, terribly upset and overwhelmed by your dog’s unexplainable behavior, explaining how unpleasant and unbearable life has become.
Which leads me back to the reason you hear smart trainers always promoting the same tired old rules, structure, accountability stuff. Because it’s the same tired old stuff we see derailing dog after dog after dog. And we’re hoping that maybe just maybe, that this time perhaps another one of you will hear it, process it, and actually run with it. 🙏
