13/04/2021
Check out this post featuring the gorgeous Sonny, written by yours truly!
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Keeping your horse agisted can be wonderful.
You make friends, you have riding buddies, and you often have a supply of very knowledgeable riders and trainers around. This can be alluring and helpful for the novice horse owner.
But what about when you donât take their advice?
What about those of us who choose positive reinforcement for our equines.
Instead of friends, I had loose acquaintances. I didnât ride, so no good there. And the knowledge? Not so much. If my horse had an injury, Iâm sure they could help, but for training and handling, I had made the decision not to use pressure and aversive equipment. Iâd never seen anyone else walk down the paddock with a treat bag and a traffic cone.
I was constantly asked - are you riding today?
To start with, Iâd smile and shrug, âno, not todayâ. Although I knew the real answer was no, maybe not ever.
Riding wasnât something my horse had been enjoying. I could see it, and I didnât like it. As I swapped all our handling to positive reinforcement, I was fine with putting down the bit and spurs indefinitely. Maybe weâd get back to riding one day, but I knew it wasnât going to be soon, and I knew if we did, it would look a little different.
But I also knew the culture in the stables was based around riding our horses. Iâd been agisting there since way back when I got lessons from them, and making this ethical shift in my training was difficult to explain to the very people who taught me how a whip works.
I used to sneak down the paddock at times when people were less likely to be there, so I could train in peace.
Eventually though, as I became comfortable in the decisions I was making around my horse care, I started to realise I was my horseâs only advocate. It was fine when I handled my animals the same way the other agistees did. But I slowly developed a safety bubble around him.
No, my friendâs kids werenât welcome to come for pony rides.
No, my uncleâs brotherâs cousin couldnât take him out.
No. He was my horse to care for and protect, and that meant getting really comfortable saying no.
Sometimes thatâs harder than others. Experienced horse folk would look at protected contact as an owner being scared of their horse. Stopped riding? The horse must have been too much for you. Giving them TREATS? That horse has it all over you.
With each of these phrases, thereâs a lot of shame attached. I felt it each time I said I wasnât riding that day.
As time went on though, I became more confident in my decisions.
What had felt vaguely uncomfortable for me to do before, such as flicking the lead rope at my horse to get him to keep walking, became truly unthinkable as I realised he wasnât being stubborn, he wanted to stay with his herd, and instead of forcing him to come away stressed, I could help him feel comfortable and confident leaving them for short periods.
I also found once I was confident with my actions, my fear and shame melted away.
Iâd no longer say I wasnât riding âtodayâ. I wasnât riding, full stop. That was my answer, and the owners and riders around me had no problem with it. They didnât stop asking if I was going to hack him out today, but I no longer felt the need to sneak down the paddock at off peak times, or like I was doing something wrong, or âcouldnât handleâ my horse.