10/29/2025
I think some people misunderstand what being kind to your horse means.
They think it's synonymous with not training your horse.
They think being kind means you think asking your horse to do anything is cruel -
They think that kindness is a cover up for incompetence.
Being soft because you "don't have the skills to train the horse"
But these people who confuse kindness for incompetence are the same people who confuse stress or fear with disobedience.
They're the same people who will shame you for training with food, but will happily brandish a whip or spurs.
They'll tell you that your horse is dangerous because you use food, but they wont consider the danger that comes with training methods that invoke fear.
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I sometimes wonder if people become addicted to the struggle - that training should be hard. The horse should resist. That we should keep going, slop around in the muck and the mire until the horse gives in.
And then I wonder whether training within the horse's genuine threshold feels a little anticlimactic. There is no struggle, no dopamine hit from seeking, struggling and then eventually achieving.
Because when you set everything up for success - you're not going through the struggle of "making the horse do the thing" because we don't "make."
We converse. We comunicate. We read their body language and alter our set up accordingly.
Unwanted behaviour is a language we listen to rather than punish. And we get so good at reading behaviour that "unwanted" is nothing more than a facial expression or a tail swish.
It's not sexy. It's not rearing and bucking and struggling and conquering.
It's just very quietly meeting your horse where they are at every single day and being so consistent with it that it doesn't feel like doing anything at all.
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A hill that I will die on time and time again:
It take very little skill to force a horse to do something.
It takes considerably more skill to get a horse to do something because they genuinely want to be there.
I know which horse person I would rather be.
https://www.yasminstuartequinephysio.com/the-horse-posture-blueprint
