09/12/2024
⚠️Trigger Warning: Pet/ Companion Animal Loss.
Hey there Swellions 🐶💙
On Sept 03, 2024, my family had to say goodbye to one of our beloved dogs, Zoey. While it wasn't entirely surprising, and we know it was absolutely the right decision, it was rather sudden and still quite upsetting. Since then, we have all been processing our loss, but admittedly, life has felt nothing short of surreal. Being over 600km away from my family, I'm not sure it's really sunk in yet.
I don't claim to have anything profound to say, and I'm certainly no grief expert. However, some realizations I've come to, having been through this countless times, in case it provides *anyone* *any kind* of solace:
🌈 Pet Loss is still loss: despite the societal stigma that still remains. In my experience, it's *never* "just an animal". Our companion animals are with us every single day *for years*; in some cases, their companionship is more consistent and unconditional than some human/human relationships.
🌈 Companion animal loss can be compounding: In my experience, the loss of Zoey triggers the loss of Tasha, which triggers the loss of Bailey, which triggers the loss of Nicky, which triggers the loss of Zack, etc., etc. Sometimes when we grieve one, we grieve them all, simultaneously.
🌈 Everyone grieves differently: some people are able to do their initial grieving and move forward. For some, it might not hit until some kind of significant event (Holidays, birthdays, etc). In my experience, it comes in waves, and these ebbs and flows last months.
🌈 The only way "out" is through: I put "out" in quotations for a reason (see next point), but you have *got* to feel your feelings, no matter how unpleasant, inconvenient or big they are. Repressed emotions will *always* seep through the cracks and impact other emotionally significant relationships.
🌈 Loss is not something you get over, but rather, it's something you grow around: for some, there never is an "out". All the more important to circle back to the point above, and to...
🌈 Choose your support system carefully: Some people will not understand how significant these types of losses can be. Be highly selective about the people you let in during this vulnerable time. You deserve people in your life who can validate and create space for your pain.
🌈Grief impacts the intellectual, emotional and physical bandwidth: This one is self explanatory, and therefore Self compassion is an essential practice.
🌈 Anticipatory Grief is real: As mentioned, this wasn't an entirely surprising loss (though I didn't think it was going to happen so soon). In my experience, the grief actually started well before we had to say goodbye.
For anyone who may be struggling through similar circumstances, I do highly recommend the book The Pet Loss Companion by Ken Dolan-Del Vecchio and Nancy Saxton-Lopez. It's very easy to digest and covers a wide range of concepts surrounding the topic.
For anyone who may be seeking support, here are a few links to some different Pet Loss Groups:
https://ottawahumane.ca/your-pet/pet-loss-support-groups/
https://ontariopetloss.org/
https://www.westhillvet.com/grief-support/
I thank you all in advance with your continued patience, and should anyone need a safe space to vent their grief, I'm always just a PM away 💙🐶💛
![I know I'm late to the party, but Happy [belated] International Dog Day! In the spirit of working WITH dogs- a little ol...](https://img3.voofla.com/348/827/523835143488271.jpg)
