Training 121's and Behaviour Consults, Classes, Dog Walking, Pet Supplies & more - Based in Coningsby
15/02/2025
I asked ChatGPT to roast Belgian Malinois:
AAh, the Belgian Malinois—because, apparently, someone thought, "What if we take a German Shepherd, crank up the intensity, and then make it way too smart for its own good?" These dogs are the equivalent of a personal trainer, a security guard, and a 5-year-old on a sugar high all rolled into one.
You know that one friend who’s always trying to prove they’re better than everyone else? That’s the Malinois. They’re so intense, they make you wonder if they’re training for the K9 Olympics or plotting to take over the world. You’ve got to be on your toes 24/7 because they’re always watching. Don’t think you can sneak in a nap; this dog is already 10 steps ahead, practicing tactical maneuvers in its head while you’re just trying to survive.
And speaking of survival, good luck trying to tire one of these dogs out. You could run a marathon, climb Everest, and do 100 push-ups, but this dog’s still out here looking like it’s got all the energy in the world. “Oh, you’re tired? I’m just getting started!” They’re basically the Energizer Bunny if the Bunny were part wolf and had a PhD in military strategy.
And let’s talk about the biting. Not just a “playful nipping” like a normal dog. No, this dog’s bite is probably in the Guinness Book of World Records under “Most Likely to Rip Through Your Soul.” You’d think it was a good idea to teach them to fetch the ball, but nope. They’re just going to chew through your hand and then retrieve your dignity instead.
But despite all their relentless energy and near-psychotic intensity, you still have to love them. They know it, too. Because after all that chaos, they’ll come sit next to you, give you that smug little stare, and be like, “Yeah, you can’t resist me. You’re welcome."
🤣🤣🤣
