10/12/2023
was the night before Christmas, when all through the shop
Not a groomer was stirring, they'd all come to a stop
The stockings were hung by the dryer with care,
Unfortunately each one was stuffed full of hair!
The bathers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of chapped hands danced in their heads.
The groomer's new clippers lay nestled in her lap
She had just passed out, t'was a long needed nap!
When in the reception there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
Away to the reception desk I flew like a flash,
Forgot about my new clippers they fell with a crash.
The moon high in the sky shone in thru the door
Illuminating paw prints I'd missed on the floor.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight filthy reindeer.
With a little old driver, I almost felt sick
I knew in a moment it must be St Nick
He never pre-booked but each year he came
I kept calling to remind him but it was always the same.
"Now Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and V***n!
On, Comet! On, Cupid! On Donner and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! Inside to the Hall!
It's time for some grooming!! Baths for you all!!
Twigs and leaves stuck to them, mud up to the eye,
When I laid my eyes on them I thought I would die.
So into the bathing room every one of them flew,
With the sleigh full of Toys, Blitzen stopped for a poo!!
And then, very softly, I heard a throat clear
Santa looked bashful he wouldn't come near.
For he knew that we'd worked for fourteen days straight
Right at this moment he pondered his fate!
'Dear groomer' he said, staring down at his feet
'I need you to help me, even though you feel beat'
'My reindeer are filthy, they stink like a skunk'
'How'd you like riding behind them getting covered in gunk?'
I stood there, mouth open, tried to hold back the tears
Why could he not book ahead after all of these years?
But I saw straight away I would have to be quick
I couldn't be responsible for letting down old St Nick!
I woke all the bathers they complained with good reason
As I told them about our last job of the season.
I saw teeth grit, thought I was in for a fight,
But they rolled up their sleeves I was so proud that night!
Water was turned on, bathing systems priming
Reinders into the bath with military timing.
First shampoo, conditioner, rinse then HV'ed
Some carding to finish, in the cage hope none pee'd!
When we all finished up the reindeer each looked devine
I went to my drawer for the very last time.
Bandanas were cut and tied on one-by-one
A little Spritz of cologne and, voila, they were done!
Tears welled in his eyes as Santa looked at his team
Groomers saved Christmas, and so it would seem,
And as they flew off, a faint voice I did hear...
'Hey groomer, can I pre-book for the same time next year?'
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