24/01/2023
All Dogs Love Me.
I've slapped people's arms. I've said clearly "she does not want you to pat her." I've stepped between people and her. I've said "please don't pat her." I have tied yellow ribbons on her leash, I have bought her a bandana that says "Do not pet." I have been her advocate.
"Can I pat your dog?"
"No"
Meanwhile, the hand is already extended towards the dog.
It is frustrating how people don't listen, to dogs or to other people.
This dog will bite. She ended up with us because she did.
But the beautiful thing is she communicates VERY CLEARLY that she does not want to be patted by strangers. She is clear on her boundaries but because "you" are not listening to her she will bite you when you pat her despite her giving you several signs she does not want to be patted. Despite me telling "you" not to pat her.
She does not approach people, she moves away or sits off to the side behind me or beside me, she puts her ears back, she lifts her lip, she wall eyes. She may as well have a neon sign flashing that says "LEAVE ME ALONE". But you know what? No one does.
"I've been around dogs all my life, they all love me."
"No sir, this one does not, and she's telling you it quite clearly."
Then there's the treat people. "I'll just give her a treat so she knows I am nice, she was probably abused."
No ma'am, she doesn't want your treat. You can't bribe her to like you. And it doesn't matter if she was abused, it doesn't matter what her past or present was, she doesn't want to be patted. "You" and your treats aren't going to be a magic pill to fix that.
So, she's muzzle trained. And she wears one in public. And as much as I am pro muzzle, she should not have to.
She should not have to wear a muzzle because people should respect her signals that she doesn't want to be patted (especially those who have had dogs all their lives and think all dogs love them). People should listen when I say not to pat her. But they don't. So she wears a muzzle so she can't bite people when they push past me, ignore me and ignore her signals that she doesn't want them in her space. I protect her, to the best of my ability, but she wears the muzzle because if that "dogs love me" dude pushes past me fast enough and shoves his hand in her face, I know he's going to be the first person to say she's vicious and blame her for the bite.
If your dog isn't comfortable being patted by strangers, then don't make it. If your dog doesn't like company in your house, then leave your dog in a safe place away from visitors. Don't approach people's dogs without their permission.
Learn and understand dog communication skills and respect them. We get a lot of emails asking us to take dogs that 'suddenly' turned on the owner/family member and bit them - in almost 100% of cases the dog warned the person, but they ignored the warning.
Dogs have boundaries. They need to learn to accept care related handling, which is best achieved by making nail trims, grooming and body checks low stress and positive. They do not need to accept hugs, kisses, patting from strangers or family members. As owners/handlers we need to advocate for them, to protect them from those who don't listen. Train them to be comfortable in muzzles, because when no one listens, muzzles protect them from being blamed for making the wrong choice - in many municipalities a minor bite is enough for a dog to be reported to the authorities. While I know my dog would not be wrong for biting, it's my responsibility to protect her from those who refuse to listen.
I also don't want random strangers patting my friendly dogs. My older girl was a therapy dog, but I still don't want you to pat her without my permission. I work with dogs and I don’t pat every one and I listen to them and respect what kind of interaction they want. So, listen to dogs, your own and other people's.
