02/05/2025
Love this, and I try my best to not default to defensive mode. It’s very challenging sometimes! But we are all subjected to our own bias. But taking on others interpretations and point of view is really important. Obviously there is a way to go about it (politely)!
We aren’t always right.
Recently I went to a barn to see a new client, and someone (not the owner) there very clearly made it known that the type of rehab I focus on wasn’t how they would approach the case.
To be honest, these kinds of interactions are why I typically don’t pick up new clients- I ADORE my current ones, the ones who see the benefits in what we work on with their horses and are happy to collaborate without the drama. Because we all know from past posts how I feel about . But you never know what you’ll walk into with a new case.
I made a rule a few years ago that I will never try to “convince” someone to approach hoof rehab the way I do. Everyone works the way we do because we believe in it and believe we see results. If someone is happier to do something else, that’s their prerogative. The best way we can “convince” anyone is by doing the best we can for the horse and seeing progress. Words and arguments rarely accomplish that. The horses are our constant teachers.
But when this person so strongly disagreed with what I was doing to this horse’s feet, I felt this overwhelming need to be right. It took everything in me to just quietly work and make the best decisions I could at the time with the horse and hooves in front of me, and leave the horse more comfortable than when I met it.
But really, I wanted to list all the reasons for why I do what I do, and for good measure, critique this person’s horses’ hooves just to “show them”- because that would have changed their mind! (not 😂😂)
It shook me up for a few hours after that appointment. First, I was shaken up because I felt offended and defensive. But then, I was shaken up because I hate when I fall back into that default of defensiveness and trying to prove the other person wrong. It’s just not productive.
It has had me thinking the last week or so about that “need to be right.” Sometimes, when I feel strongly about something, that “need” shows its ugly head, even on social media. And I don’t think this is unique to me (or at least I think not). Our pride creeps in and we want to “educate.” Or make them realize how wrong they are. One of those. lol.
But really, a need to be right can close us off to new ideas, or even better ideas. It can stop us from learning things that may help even more horses.
Yet I see this so much in the horse world- not even just the hoofcare world. And I’m not immune.
The truth is.. is there a right and wrong with hooves? Are hooves so black and white? Objectively we know every case is different and we need to cater to each horse as an individual. But do we practice what we preach?
Do you ever fall victim to this “need to be right”? Have you gotten into arguments where you argued just to prove someone wrong? Do you have a “hill you die on”?
I don’t have any wonderful insights for this post. Just musing over my continual journey to try to be better.
