14/07/2023
Valuable advice on teaching a child how to behave with a dog & avoiding dogs biting
"I need help. Today my dog bit my child out of nowhere."
This post is a bit blunt but I need to share it. I don't share this so bluntly to lecture people, I share it because I really care about dog and child safety, and it breaks my heart whenever I read about a child getting bitten, or I see a preventable situation being filmed and shared on social media instead.
There is a rise in dog bites in the UK at the moment, which is really concerning. A very large percentage of reported bites happen in the family home. What else is concerning is the amount of videos I see DAILY of children being filmed behaving completely inappropriately around dogs, where the dog is giving off a lot of communication to say "I don't like this", and it isn't being seen by the adults supervising because they don't know what they're looking for. But some of the stuff I'm seeing...it's just common sense not to let that happen?
Examples of videos I have seen in the last 24 hours alone...
1. Children riding on dogs like a horse
2. Children hitting dogs because they don't know how to be gentle with them yet
3. Children pulling ears and tails
4. Children approaching sleeping dogs and literally flicking their bits and pieces
5. Children approaching dogs that are eating from their food bowl and trying to stroke them
6. Children wrapping arms around dogs to hug them because they love them (not every dog enjoys a hug and we should always make sure that this sort of thing is consent based)
7. Babies crawling in to a dog's safe space when the dog has moved to get away
8. Dogs that had children running around & screaming in close quarters, were barking at the children but didn't have any way to get away from it, or didn't feel able to move away (in this situation we need to step in and separate)
9. Children continually trying to stroke dogs who are communicating that they don't want to be stroked right now
This stuff is NOT OK. One day, the tolerant dog won't be tolerant anymore and it's our job to prevent these situations.
I've worked with hundreds of dogs. Many of the dogs I see have a bite history, because they were put in a situation that just pushed them too far and they had no other way to say please get away from me. Most are great communicators and that communication just wasn't recognised.
A growl is WAY up the ladder of communication, there's actually so much that comes before that.
What did I see in every single one of these videos?
Whale eyes (wide eyes showing the whites of eyes). Lip licking. Yawns. Narrowed eyes. Looking away from the child. Facial tension. Ears back. Appeasement licking (a couple of quick licks to the child accompanied with other stress signals and a quick look away post-lick).
ALL signs that a dog is stressed and is asking for space. It doesn't matter if they're wagging their tail because there are a lot of different tail wags, not all mean a dog is happy. Please note this isn't an exhaustive list of ways that dogs say they don't like situations.
As adults, it is OUR responsibility to actively supervise dogs and children in their interactions, ensuring the interactions are safe for both parties. That means 100% attention on them, not on phones or the tv. It means that we should be able to recognise unsafe interactions and prevent them from happening. It also means that we need to be able to read our dog's body language and prevent situations that are causing them stress.
Other things we need to take in to account:
1. If a dog is in pain or a bit sore then they will be less tolerant (this doesn't only apply to senior dogs)
2. If a dog is a bit older then they might prefer their space, they might have some vision or hearing loss so be more easily startled, they might be more prone to being sore and tired
3. Dogs feel different on different days, just like we do. If we know a dog has had a bit of a stressful day then they may respond differently to things, than they would on a 'normal' day.
4. Every dog is an individual and some feel different about children generally, to other dogs.
Sometimes children just want to love your family dog but don't know how to do that in a dog-appropriate way yet, and we need to guide them. Here is an example from my morning today. My daughter was playing with a bouncy ball on a rubber chain and was bouncing it towards my dog because she wanted to show it to him. Some dogs may have wanted to play with this, some dogs might not have liked it. The reality is my dog was not bothered by it at all, but it is my responsibility to make sure they're both happy and to teach dog-safe interactions, because one day she might meet a dog who doesn't like it.
I stepped forward and stopped her. "Dogs might not like that because he doesn't really understand what your bouncy ball is, it's a bit big and loud sounding. It's nice that you want to play with him. Would you like to help fill up his treat ball with some breakfast?"
An easy redirection in to an appropriate activity that helped my daughter to feel included and involved, that was more appropriate. If children are not old enough to understand these sort of instructions or explanations than you must use management. It is as simple as that.
If you don't know how to read your dog's body language and would like to learn how to recognise the MANY steps that come before a growl, I offer consultations to go through this, and there is a chapter on dog body language in my book Empowering Your Dog Through Choice (only £9.99 on Amazon). The book also includes information on choice in the home, interactions, consent, the emotional bucket, and the jigsaw puzzle of behaviour which is all important to know if your dog is living with, or spending time around children.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Empowering-Your-Through-Choice-Relationships/dp/B0BCSCZDSB
You'll also find information on dog body language and important dos and don'ts in my Preparing Your Dog For A Baby online course.
https://knowyourdog.thinkific.com/courses/preparing-your-dog-for-a-baby
In my opinion understanding all of this is such an important part of caring for a dog, it's essential behavioural understanding, and knowing how to read your dog's more subtle body language will help with bite prevention, not just now but with all dogs you spend time around throughout your life.
