Sunny Side Horsemanship

Sunny Side Horsemanship Horsemanship trainer and coach. Helping others create connection & build confidence with compassion.

Sometimes we watch what others around us are doing and we feel like we’re doing something wrong. Or we’re not doing enou...
02/01/2025

Sometimes we watch what others around us are doing and we feel like we’re doing something wrong. Or we’re not doing enough. Or we should be different. Or if we just had all the bells and whistles that make everything look spectacular. Then! Then we would have it made. Then we would have the support we crave.

We waste our time, energy, and resources chasing something that will never give us what we want because we will never find community trying to be someone other than our authentic selves. We can never find where we belong if we do not know or are not happy with who we are and what we have to offer to those who would see our value. We will never find where we belong if we do not value ourselves.

Be your self. Love your self. Create the dreams you love and your true community will find you.

In our pursuit of connection and wanting to belong, we often forget that in order for us to be truly connected with othe...
01/30/2025

In our pursuit of connection and wanting to belong, we often forget that in order for us to be truly connected with others, we must first have connection with ourselves.

We must connect with our soul and face our greatest fears and biggest heartbreaks. We must find peace and acceptance that those things are part of our past and do not have to be our future. We must connect with our soul to discover what it is that brings us joy and then strive for those and not the things we feel that we “should be” doing based on judgments of other people.

You must connect with your body being thankful for it protecting you and carrying your soul this far. Become in tune with what your body craves to keep it healthy and energetic and don’t rely on fashion and trends telling you how you should be. Find your center and move based on feel not by sight. Feel the work your body does for you and be grateful.

When awareness and attunement of self in body and soul becomes habit, connection with other beings comes with ease.

Not everyone will see your value, and that’s ok. Not everyone will believe in you and that’s ok too. Not everyone will u...
01/29/2025

Not everyone will see your value, and that’s ok.

Not everyone will believe in you and that’s ok too.

Not everyone will understand your mindset, your beliefs and your values. Not everyone will like your personality or the way you do things. That’s ok too.

Be yourself and don’t try to hide you.

Focus on understanding, improving, and staying true to who you are and what you want in this life through the different seasons.

Believe in yourself even when no one else does. Value your time in this life and make each day good in its own way.

The people who are meant to be in your circle, the ones that accept, value, and believe in you bringing peace, happiness, and connection, will come. The others that ask you to to be different so they are comfortable, will fade onto their own way.

I am super curious what Astraea will take to in the under saddle work. Thus far I am noticing that she's not really a fa...
01/28/2025

I am super curious what Astraea will take to in the under saddle work. Thus far I am noticing that she's not really a fan of obstacles but she loves patterns. We're working on the obstacles a lot right now as it's going to be a big part of the competition and I'm trying to make them a bit easier for her by putting them into a pattern she can learn for right now until she builds a bit more confidence.

Also, in case you missed it, I posted a Q&A video this morning with some of the questions that were asked. More will be coming soon and feel free to add any questions you may have and I'll save them to answer.

Here is the first Q&A video answering your questions. I haven't gotten to all of them yet, but will be answering more so...
01/28/2025

Here is the first Q&A video answering your questions. I haven't gotten to all of them yet, but will be answering more soon. In the meantime, feel free to ask more questions or follow up questions to these. Check below in the comments.

When a horse comes into training here I do not put my focus on connecting with the horse. Meaning, I don’t go out of my ...
01/25/2025

When a horse comes into training here I do not put my focus on connecting with the horse. Meaning, I don’t go out of my way to do everything the horse likes, avoiding what they don’t like, just to get them to like me.

My focus is to teach each horse to live successfully in the human world that it will be returning to. Just like us, there are things our horses need to be able to do that they might not like for the necessity of their well being.

For example, a horse may HATE their legs being touched and kick out or dance away any time you think about touching there. But, horses need to be able to stand quietly and calmly without sedation for the farrier without the farrier fearing for their safety.

I approach training with the focus on creating quiet and willing horses that can emotionally process new things well so WHEN their owner introduces something to them that I have not, they can succeed.

That doesn’t mean I’m out there scaring horses into submission. I am not out there running horses laps around the round pen or on a lunge till they feel they have to stay with me. Horses handled that way tend to become guarded and jumpy not quiet and willing.

I am not out there trying bribe horses into liking me either. I don’t avoid things they don’t like in order to keep things happy and peaceful all the time. I teach them how to work through what they don’t like without fear or anger which helps create emotional fortitude.

Just like people, connection happens when you learn to understand and communicate with each other well. It is not something you can make happen, it just happens over time when you get on the same page and actually like each other.

Going to try out something a little different; what questions do you have that I can about training, riding, our horses...
01/24/2025

Going to try out something a little different; what questions do you have that I can about training, riding, our horses, my program, or anything else that I can answer?

The number one thing on a list of things that someone is looking for when they send their horse to training is calm. The...
01/23/2025

The number one thing on a list of things that someone is looking for when they send their horse to training is calm. The horse must be calm. I agree in that I want a calm horse, but I have come to realize that what I consider calm is not what other people are envisioning and it isn’t just because I train professionally and work with young horses all the time. There is an epidemic of people in the horse community with unrealistic expectations of what calm actually is and do not understand that what they think is calm is actually emotionally unresponsive.

Typically when someone tells me they are looking for a calm horse, what it ultimately translates when we start working together to the horse doing absolutely nothing in response to anything that goes on around them except maybe look and sometimes that is even to much for their rider. The people who demand the most calmness from their horse are some of the most uptight, anxious, always searching for something that is wrong people that I meet. I see so many horses that truly are calm and responsive suddenly jumping out of their skin because someone sat down on them that can’t relax in their body and have such a grip on the horse in their seat, leg and hand that it is impossible for the horse to actually be calm.

I 100% agree that if someone is a beginner or unconfident they should be riding an experienced and well broke horse that knows their job and isn’t anxious about it. This does not mean that the horse will not act like a horse. We were the species that decided climbing on the back of a prey animal was a great idea, if we’re not ready to handle what that entails we should probably stick to our stick horses and mopeds.

This addiction to calmness is trying to force and control the body, whether ours or our horse, to stay in a state of calmness rather than understanding that true emotional balance is the ability to fluidly change from parasympathetic (PNS relax, digest, play) to sympathetic (SNS flight, fight, freeze) and back again. A healthy nervous system DOES react to something that is scary! That is its job; to keep us alive and safe. A healthy nervous system can also understand the moment that it’s safe and come back down to a relaxed state seamlessly.

I don’t want a horse that can’t be startled or upset as that means they have essentially shut out the outside world. I want the horse that startles and has the emotional regulation and ability to respond to my aids safely and resettle continuing their job without carrying the tension along on the rest of the ride.

As much ability to respond to stimuli, regroup and continue immediately that I require of my horse, I require more out of myself. I find it completely unfair to ask a flight creature that we have chosen to sit on to have more ability to emotionally regulate than we do. It is our job to prepare ourselves physically, mentally, and emotionally before putting ourselves on a horse. If you find yourself unable to let go of something in your life and quickly move on, my guess is that it will be similar, if not more so, when you sit on a horse. My recommendation is to work on that with a professional, therapist and equine coach, so that you can have the tools you need to actually be fair to your horse. We need to be emotionally prepared to take a scare, be able to lead our horse through it, and then continue on our way without holding tension.

01/22/2025

Cold weather days are perfect for riding out from the barn solo to teach the horses how to walk out quietly and stand for a bit before continuing their walk. There are quite a few horses I work with that will happily stand in the middle of a trail with a buddy, but take them out in the field solo away from the barn and it’s a whole different ball game with their mind on the barn.

This exercise is another of the ones I use to prepare a horse to remain focused on me while other horses ride away from them. If they can’t stand calmly and focused on me solo, how will they be able to remain calm and focused with a friend leaving them?

01/21/2025

This is my second session with Astraea specifically working to have her prepared for mounting. Horses that have concern for the mounting block benefit from being taught to move to it. This helps to engage their brain in the process and helps them to make sense of the job that we are asking them to do.

The common practice for when a horse moves away from the block is to dismount the block and either move the block around following the horse until they stand still, or bring the horse back to the block. Some people require another person to hold the horse while they get on. None of these methods do a good job of teaching a horse to come to the block for you, engage their mind in the process, and teach them to stand quietly until you are on, settled, and ready to go.

In the first session preparing her for the block, I taught Astraea to move her hip towards me on cue without the block around. Now I'm starting to stand on the block and have her come to me. This process will continue with me leaning over her more, stepping up into the stirrup to lean over, getting on and getting off. When using this method to line a horse up for the block, the horse eventually will reach the point that as you approach the block from any direction, they will automatically adjust their body to stand perfectly at the block and will be able to be mounted without moving.

This video is a great example of how I work with a horse's mind engaging them physically and mentally in the process of what I am trying to teach them rather than just doing something to them and expecting them to hang in there calmly while I'm doing something they're not completely comfortable with.

The best things in life are not what come from comfort and ease, but what comes through hard work and dedication. Those ...
01/21/2025

The best things in life are not what come from comfort and ease, but what comes through hard work and dedication. Those things that require late nights and early mornings, skipping what looks good now for what you are working towards. The things that require difficult growth; a shredding of who you currently are to create the you that you need to be to become the person that is the kind of successful that you dream of. You cannot become what you dream of without the dying of the current way you live and view life.

Integration not desensitization. A typical method to expose horses to objects and stimuli is desensitization. In the for...
01/20/2025

Integration not desensitization. A typical method to expose horses to objects and stimuli is desensitization. In the form that I most often see people implementing the person pulls out a scary object and shows it to the horse and eventually starts doing something to the horse with said object. Most people I work with look for the horse to stand still and “accept” the object with some resemblance of calm before they quit. For those who understand the difference between the brain standing still vs. in motion, the next step would be do similar things after asking the horse to go into motion. Most people I work with don’t even do this step which IS an incredibly important part of the process.

In my training program I do not approach the horse with this style of exposure. One of the things desensitizing typically utilizes is flooding; the continuing use of stimuli that is upsetting until the subject no longer has an emotional reaction to it. Desensitizing works by blunting the emotions and thereby blunting all emotional sensitivity creating dull and unresponsive horses. When operating in the sympathetic nervous system (flight, flight, freeze) the horse is no longer able to process emotions which only happens in their “thinking brain.” Flooding as a form of therapy to overcome fears is least effective on those who have PTSD or have already given up (shut down).

Instead, I prefer the approach of integration. Layering in new concepts only when the foundation is in place is one part of this. Failure of this might look like trying to take a horse out on a high energy group ride and expecting them to be calm and responsive when they can’t be relaxed solo and with a buddy riding away from them; both of which require focus and responsiveness to the rider over what is going on in their surroundings.

Movement and touch therapy are also part of integration and can help bring a horse’s emotions back into balance. Once the horse is in balance, integrating the objects and obstacles into the exercises they already understand in a way that makes sense what the “job” is develops curiosity and confidence in the horse. They learn when new things are introduced they have a different “job” they have to figure out. The horse’s willingness to try continues to grow where desensitization relies more on the ability to expose the horse to everything they possibly can until the horse no longer emotionally responds.

Integration instead of desensitizing is the game changer on horse’s with past traumatic experiences and wild or exceptionally sensitive horses. Integration develops a confident, curious horse that is emotionally stable while remaining physically and mentally sensitive and responsive to their environment and our aids.

There is nothing quite so freeing as thinking back on all the hard times and knowing I didn’t just make it through, but ...
01/19/2025

There is nothing quite so freeing as thinking back on all the hard times and knowing I didn’t just make it through, but those times helped form me into the version of myself that I now love. Those times taught me the strength and power I possess and give me confidence in a future regardless of circumstances I may face knowing I won’t just make it through; I will continue becoming another version of myself that I love and is right for that time.

Much of my life has been a series of taking opportunities that are given and growing them the best I can with minimal pl...
01/18/2025

Much of my life has been a series of taking opportunities that are given and growing them the best I can with minimal planning beforehand. I now find myself in a stage where I am trying to plan certain opportunities and growing those. I still grab onto the ones that just appear that I feel are taking me the direction I would like to go, but those aren't solely what I rely on anymore.

This baby is one of those things I have dreamed of, planned and saved up for, and researched available options for years. She is the only horse I have actually spent literally years shopping for and also the most expensive horse I have ever paid for. I stumbled upon her breeder and absolutely fell in love at first sight of her photo. Thus far she has surpassed any expectations I had and has been the absolute best complimenting personality to my other almost 2yo baby TB.

I have been so fortunately blessed to have had multiple once in a lifetime horses given to me and have done my best to grab on and see where those opportunities with those horses took and still take me. Now, as those very special horses start reaching the age where I have to keep retirement in mind, I find myself for the first time, in the position of planning for a new world of opportunities to open as I continue to move forward. I find myself being a bit more selective of the things I pursue to have more time that is focused on the things that make my soul absolutely soar.

Astraea thinks tall people are a little scary but she’s working through it. Started teaching her to move up to the block...
01/17/2025

Astraea thinks tall people are a little scary but she’s working through it. Started teaching her to move up to the block on cue, but the camera cut off on me and didn’t get a bit of that and it was a really good session. 🙄

01/15/2025

Bringing my pups along for a trail ride provides a great despooking opportunity, especially when they come flying out of the trees behind us running straight for me.

Astraea met the scariest chicken I have on our walk around the farm today.
01/14/2025

Astraea met the scariest chicken I have on our walk around the farm today.

01/13/2025

This guy rides the trails like someone meandering along for a Sunday afternoon stroll.

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66 Lula Lane
Farmville, VA
23901

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+15406340040

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Videos

Ready or not here comes show season. Vikhtory says he’s game to get ready, he’s so over the winter boredom.

How do I know spring is on the horizon? My days and months start getting super busy again after the holiday and winter lull with horses to get ready for the warm months and lesson times start filling weeks in advance. Here’s to sunshine and great footing for us all.

Don’t get stuck into a style and method when changing something so minor as adding a couple cones can make all the difference. Astraea is learning how to lunge and one of the tools I like to use is placing cones as a guide for where I want the horse to go. This teaches them very quickly what it is I’m actually looking for and reduces the diving in or pulling out that usually happens when a horse first learns to lunge. It becomes a visual guide for the horse to easily develop a correct circle.

Cold weather days are perfect for riding out from the barn solo to teach the horses how to walk out quietly and stand for a bit before continuing their walk. There are quite a few horses I work with that will happily stand in the middle of a trail with a buddy, but take them out in the field solo away from the barn and it’s a whole different ball game with their mind on the barn. This exercise is another of the ones I use to prepare a horse to remain focused on me while other horses ride away from them. If they can’t stand calmly and focused on me solo, how will they be able to remain calm and focused with a friend leaving them?

Astraea
Astraea

This is my second session with Astraea specifically working to have her prepared for mounting. Horses that have concern for the mounting block benefit from being taught to move to it. This helps to engage their brain in the process and helps them to make sense of the job that we are asking them to do. The common practice for when a horse moves away from the block is to dismount the block and either move the block around following the horse until they stand still, or bring the horse back to the block. Some people require another person to hold the horse while they get on. None of these methods do a good job of teaching a horse to come to the block for you, engage their mind in the process, and teach them to stand quietly until you are on, settled, and ready to go. In the first session preparing her for the block, I taught Astraea to move her hip towards me on cue without the block around. Now I'm starting to stand on the block and have her come to me. This process will continue with me leaning over her more, stepping up into the stirrup to lean over, getting on and getting off. When using this method to line a horse up for the block, the horse eventually will reach the point that as you approach the block from any direction, they will automatically adjust their body to stand perfectly at the block and will be able to be mounted without moving. This video is a great example of how I work with a horse's mind engaging them physically and mentally in the process of what I am trying to teach them rather than just doing something to them and expecting them to hang in there calmly while I'm doing something they're not completely comfortable with.

Not sure there is anything more satisfying in this weather than rolling out good hay for the horses. The bale unroller has made my life so much easier by being able to put out hay to multiple fields off the same bale to reduce waste while keeping fresh dry hay available 24/7. By being able to unroll bales wherever I want, I can reduce the amount of muck that is created from standing in the same place and also have improved my fields through the natural reseeding and fertilizing that happens as I move from place to place in the fields.

Atticus
Atticus

Bringing my pups along for a trail ride provides a great despooking opportunity, especially when they come flying out of the trees behind us running straight for me.

Atticus
Atticus

This guy rides the trails like someone meandering along for a Sunday afternoon stroll.

Many horses that I see are labeled unpredictable that I actually find quite predictable to work with. I find that often times it is simply a case of the person only having limited knowledge of different methods of training and don’t have a program that agrees with the horse. This is the exact reason that I, as a professional, have purposely sought out so many instructors of a wide variety of disciplines and styles; to be able to meet as many horses as possible with what they individually need to be successful. There is no one trainer or program that I could say I follow closely as my program has developed from my wide range of experiences and is constantly evolving as I learn more. Learning different methods is something that has a caution as learning different styles before having a solid understanding of each has dire consequences, but that’s a topic for another day. I do believe, though, that anyone taking in problem solving cases especially, but truly any professional, should learn many different ways to do the same thing in order to best serve the horse.

We now offer chicken proofing of your horse. 🙈😆

Atticus
Atticus

A client horse starting to learn how to drag the barrel.

Lincoln
Lincoln

Anxiety can be combated by bringing awareness back to the present moment. One of the ways I do that is through creating awareness of the body. Bringing the horse’s mind and awareness back into their body. Through this process each horse’s emotions range drastically and I am always careful to do a little at a time and not push them to far. Lincoln got to work through some emotions today including some anger and defensiveness. During this time it’s essential to stay unreactive yet being able to back off or stay steady to support the horse as they need through this process. Here’s a tiny clip of what we worked through.

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