04/27/2023
What DO you want your horse to do?
I think this is a really valuable change in mindset when we are having a moment that feels difficult, scary or frustrating with our horses.
If your horse is acting up everytime you pass the gate and trying to turn around or falling in at a particular area or being concerned about where her friends are do your best to not focus on "don't do ______" or "stop doing_____." That is what they want to do in that moment. They are INTRINSICALLY motivated to do that thing. So if you say no, with no additional ask, they are going to likely go right back to that thing, even if they do stop momentarily. You haven't really asked for anything different. Also, this is just a negative head space to be in. You are annoyed, worried, focused on the thing you don't want, thinking your horse is being naughty....and also not really providing any guidance to do anything different.
Instead, ask for something you do want. Visualize it. Visualize every step and then ASK THEM TO DO THE THING. Please calmly walk forward on this specific path. Please yield your shoulders. Please switch your bend. Please do these transitions with precision. Guess what, you could also probably use some good, clear direction/a plan in that moment too. Honestly it doesn't matter what the thing is most of the time. Make a plan and guide your horse through it.
Think of it like a toddler. Do you want to run around behind them yelling no don't do that 1 million times fom them just to find the next thing to get into
Or, do you say, hey come along and let's do this other thing together that seems interesting. Be a confident, guiding leader and invite them to join you in your task.