06/23/2024
Beautifully written. Our dogs, as well. Every living being. ♥️
I was interviewed the other day and one of the questions I was asked was,
who is the horse?
The answer that spilled out of my mouth, albeit in slightly nonsensical fashion was, well, first and foremost, the horse belongs only to themselves. Any definition I offer could only ever capture a tiny portion of who and what they are.
It’s important to me that I continually remind myself that my horse, the horse, is sovereign.
They are not my mirror, my guru, nor my muse.
They are not really ‘mine’ at all.
They do not require I pedestal them in order they then be asked to live up to my fantastical demands. My horse, the horse, as a being, continues to exist without me and I am neither owed nor deserving of their favor.
And yet, despite this, they are endlessly gracious and benevolent. Endlessly giving of their body, mind, and heart, in order that we may explore the world together.
A reality I endeavor to never take for granted. This idea- beyond horses- has become somewhat of a thesis, a grand question that I continually loll around the edges of my brain.
Who is, was, this land, if she belongs only to herself?
The creatures, the non-humans, who occupy her?
And last night, walking down to the back paddocks, two dogs by my side and the sun fast disappearing, I reminded myself that I, too, belong only to myself. And that every now and then, I, we, need reminding.
Of late, I’ve found myself getting a little tight. Holding too firmly to the needs and responsibilities that I have, of the demands placed on me in the world, of those that I have chosen. I am not unique in this— we all share such a reality, to varying degrees.
But I could feel my sense of worth, my value, being attached to what I could produce, create, or attend to.
And I had to remind myself, separate to all of that, I still belong to myself.
Belonging, returning to yourself- understanding yourself as ‘home’- is the point of return for the exhale, the start point for the inhale.
If we speak of nervous system regulation, of being able to continually balance within a life that is every changing and dynamic, then having a home within your own body, a place of return that is of nothing and no-one but your own is a necessary place to understand, to connect to, and when necessary, to find.
Remembering, periodically, that you belong only to yourself is the place that allows us to find belonging of all the other kinds.
We, the horse, first and foremost belong only to ourselves.
Onwards,
❤️ Jane
