01/13/2025
The urge to change or fix others
This has been a struggle of mine for years - the over focus on what others should be doing. Watching people make mistakes or reject information I know could help them has left me squirming internally more often than I care to admit
And my mentors, my dear teachers who have been ever patient with me while I do the very same - reject or misunderstand information that they know I need - have helped me over the years to understand this. They have a calm and peaceful way of watching people’s journeys without becoming internally disrupted. They have a security I envy- and over time I’ve come to understand this security, though I can’t say I possess it 100% of the time, I am happily improving.
This security comes from focusing on ourselves, and understanding excess focus on others is a diversion from our own work. It means that the more we take our craft seriously and weave it into our whole lives, the more grace we have for others - because it is serious and sometimes very difficult business. When we really understand the struggle to change ourselves, we realize how difficult or even impossible it is to change someone else.
We come to accept that nothing will “take” until the subject is ready, and the attempt to pressure someone ahead of their time will surely detract from the beautiful and very unique path to growth of the individual.
It really helps to look back on my own path, and to think what my teachers thought of me all those years ago. I’d like to think I’m unrecognizable compared to that person back then - and I remember the power of a seed planted, and the no judgement of a teacher who leads the way by example.
