Yocum Dog Training

09/04/2025

The Tail of Two Dogs

Once upon a time, there were two dogs. Both were deeply loved. Both had every need met. But their lives were not the same.

Dog A lived in comfort.
He slept in the bed. He ate when he wanted. He received attention the moment he asked. If he pawed at his people, they stroked him. If he barked, they hurried to respond. If he whined, they soothed him. Walks happened when convenient. Sure he knew how to sit and a few cute tricks, but if he resisted something, he was never pushed.

Dog A’s life looked perfect. But he was never challenged. He was never taught how to handle stress. He had no practice waiting, no practice recovering from frustration, no practice finding calm again after pressure.

So when the smallest shifts came, dinner late, a guest in his spot on the couch, a stranger walking past the yard, Dog A broke under the weight of them. Even tiny changes felt like earthquakes. He whined. He barked. He guarded. He snapped. He paced. And when bigger changes arrived, a new baby, a move, a schedule shift, Dog A did not just wobble. He crumbled.

Dog B lived in resilience.
He was also loved, but his people believed in coaching, not coddling. Lessons were built into daily life.

When he played fetch or tug, the game always included pauses and drops. He learned how to calm himself in the middle of excitement. Around the house, his people set up small obstacle challenges with chairs and broomsticks. He practiced problem-solving and built confidence with their guidance. When guests came to the door, he was coached through calm, polite greetings. He stayed involved without losing control. Inside the home, he practiced distance. He lay down away from his people while they cooked, cleaned, or relaxed, resisting the urge to move until he found calm in stillness.

None of this was about commands. It was involvement, guidance, and rehearsal. Little doses of stress paired with recovery became part of who Dog B was.

So when life shifted, when routines changed, when unexpected noise filled the house, Dog B knew how to adapt. He trusted his people. He stayed steady.

The moral of the tail is simple:
Both dogs were loved. Both had their needs met. But only one was prepared for life as it really is. Life is unpredictable, imperfect, sometimes inconvenient.

Comfort without challenge creates fragility.
Coaching through challenge creates resilience.

Take this with you

If you want your dog to become more like Dog B:
• Add rules into play like fetch or tug so excitement stays balanced.
• Create small obstacle challenges at home to build problem-solving and confidence.
• Coach your dog through calm, polite greetings with guests.
• Practice distance in the house by asking your dog to stay settled while you cook, clean, or relax.

Small challenges today prepare your dog for life’s bigger ones.

09/03/2025

Half-truths do not help dogs.

One side says: “Just give food when your dog lays down. Reinforce calm and they will be calm.”
Food alone is not the answer. Too much food creates anticipation, not peace.

The other side says: “You cannot reinforce calm. A cookie will not turn a Border Collie into a couch potato.”
That is true. No trainer can change a dog’s personality. And they should not.

Both sides miss the truth.

Reinforcing calm is not about changing who a dog is.
It is about shaping a state of mind.

Personality is permanent.
State of mind is fluid.
Dogs can be frantic, fearful, focused, or calm depending on what they practice.

Shaping calm means teaching them how to shift into that mindset instead of living stuck in arousal.

Because high arousal is not harmless.
It creates pacing, barking, reactivity, guarding, destruction, even aggression.

Calm gives clarity.
Calm gives freedom.
Calm gives balance.

Food helps start the picture.
What gets reinforced gets repeated.
But food alone cannot hold it.

Real calm is shaped in daily life.
Affection comes when calm.
The leash clips when calm.
Doors open when calm.
Rules, boundaries, and limitations keep calm the default.

Food begins the picture.
Structure and lifestyle complete it.

Reinforcing calm does not mean changing personality.
It means teaching life skills.
It means giving dogs the ability to regulate.
It means letting them be who they are — and thrive because of it.

Reinforcing calm is not about changing personality. It is about shaping a state of mind.

08/27/2025

The Dangerous Myth: “Dogs Are Not Pack Animals”

Lately, there’s been a surge of claims that dogs aren’t pack animals and that dominance is only situational and fluid. On the surface, those lines sound science-based and progressive. In reality, they’re half-truths stripped of context, misapplied to modern homes in ways that put dogs and families at risk.

This isn’t about nitpicking research. It’s about how these ideas are being sold to the public, dressed up in feel-good words that deny reality.

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1. The science isn’t wrong, but the way it is used is

Yes, dominance can be fluid. Yes, dogs aren’t wolves. Yes, they don’t form rigid, captive-wolf style hierarchies in all situations.

But here’s the problem:
• That science gets twisted into the claim that dogs don’t compete at all.
• It is used to argue that dogs don’t need leadership.
• It tells owners that dogs and humans just naturally coexist without conflict.

That is not science. That is wishful thinking and it leaves families unprepared for the realities of living with a predator in a human world.

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2. Ignoring pack drive is ignoring biology

No one denies prey drive exists. No one denies food drive exists. So why do some try to erase pack drive, the drive to belong, to organize socially, to find position within a group?

Pack drive is real. It exists in wolves, feral dogs, and domestic dogs. It is why dogs seek belonging. It is why they follow, test, or step up to lead if no one else does.

To pretend dogs have no pack drive is to ignore a foundational part of canine psychology.

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3. Dogs today live more like captive wolves than wild ones

Wild wolf families cooperate naturally. Captive wolves, strangers thrown together, competed, fought, and stressed each other constantly.

Now think about our dogs:
• Unrelated individuals forced into tight spaces.
• Removed from their natural jobs.
• Living in an artificial environment with rules they don’t understand.

That doesn’t look like wild harmony. It looks a lot like captivity. Which means dogs today need more human guidance, not less.

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4. Interspecies competition is not imaginary, it is measurable

Those who deny competition exists between dogs and humans should look at the numbers:
• 4.5 million dog bites occur annually in the U.S.
• Over half of victims are children.
• Most bites happen at home, involving familiar dogs.
• The triggers are often space, food, or affection.

This is interspecies competition in action. Ignoring it doesn’t make it disappear. It just makes families less prepared to prevent it.

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5. The cost of feel-good messaging

Why does this narrative spread? Because it is comforting. It tells people:
• You don’t need to lead.
• Your dog will just naturally fit in.
• Structure and boundaries are outdated.

But the cost is steep: dogs confused, children injured, families broken. The reality is, when people step back, dogs step in. Often through guarding, pushing, or unsafe control of resources.

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6. The truth

Dogs are not wild wolves. They are not rigid captives either. They are social, group-oriented predators living in a human-made world.

They do have pack drive. They do compete. They do require structure. They require understanding and fulfillment.

Leadership is not about force. It is about fairness, predictability, and giving dogs the clarity they cannot create on their own.

Denying this reality doesn’t protect dogs. It leaves them, and us, more vulnerable.

08/20/2025

The Game of Life With Dogs

Just like us, dogs need rules, boundaries, and limitations in every part of their life.
We live by them at work, at home, with family, and with friends. We teach them to our kids without a second thought.

But when it comes to our dogs, people often think structure is “mean.” The truth is simple: structure is freedom.

1. Rules are the clear no’s. No stealing food. No blasting out the door. Rules keep life safe and fair.
2. Boundaries are about respect and permission. Affection is invited, not demanded. The couch is shared when you say so. Boundaries build calm and respectful relationships.
3. Limitations are the “how much.” Play ends before it tips into chaos. Excitement has an off switch. Limitations teach balance and self-control.

Put them together and you give your dog a frame of reference for the human world. A dog who knows the rules of the game can regulate themselves, manage their emotions, and live with true freedom.

Just as in the game of life, rules, boundaries, and limitations are what make it possible to actually enjoy the game.

08/14/2025

I see so many people say their dog wakes them up for breakfast.
Sometimes before the sun is even up.
Sometimes more than once a night.

Or the second they open their eyes, the dog is already on.
Bouncing. Recharged. Ready to move their human theough the day.

That is not how our mornings go.

I get up. Move through my routine.
Maybe make coffee.
My dogs are still asleep.

No pacing.
No staring me down.
No “hurry up and feed me” routine.

Since they were puppies, I have worked on this with them.
Taught them that our days have a rhythm and that rhythm feels better than living in constant go-mode.

It shows up everywhere.

Like mealtime.
My dogs eat when we eat.
Right there with us.

I call it social eating.
For them, it is not just food. It is connection.
It is trust.
It is respect for each other’s space.

The other night my husband set our dinner down in the living room so we could watch a show.
Three plates of food, nose-level for three dogs.
And he walked away.

The dogs did not move.

Not because they were told “leave it.”
Because they did not need to be told.

We have built the kind of impulse control where they do not take what is not theirs.
Not from us.
Not from each other.
Choosing not to take it is more rewarding to them than grabbing it.

Dogs are capable of learning this.
You can build it with them.

When you do, you get a dog who is calm, trusted, and able to make great choices on their own.

That is when life with your dog gets really, really good.

This video was badly made lol but it shows me throwing a pork chop around Bear without a leave it cue. Your dog could have this level of internal hold back too.

08/05/2025

Most people define dog welfare by comfort, love, and safety.
But that’s only part of the picture.
Welfare also means honoring your dog’s instincts, biology, and drive.
This post breaks down what form and function really mean and why they matter more than you think.

07/28/2025

🐾 PSA: Your Dog Is Not a Fur Baby. And That’s the Problem.

We say we love our dogs like family.
Eighty-five percent of owners call their dog their child.
We throw them parties, dress them up, give them full freedom, and call it love.

But love without understanding isn’t love.
It’s projection.
And it’s hurting them.

Ninety-nine percent of dogs in the U.S. are living with at least one serious behavioral issue.
Separation anxiety. Reactivity. Destructive frustration. Chronic stress.
This isn’t random. Did you read that? 99%.

When we humanize dogs, we stop seeing them clearly.
We filter their needs through a human lens.
We confuse independence with rejection.
We call boundaries mean.
We give endless affection, no structure, and expect peace.
We offer too much freedom too soon without teaching how to handle it.
Then we wonder why our dogs feel lost, anxious, or out of control.

Humanizing doesn’t honor the dog.
It causes us to forget that real freedom is earned through relationship, not handed out through impulse.

Dogs aren’t meant to be micromanaged.
They are meant to be guided.
They need the chance to learn, grow, and eventually make good choices on their own.

Dogs don’t need to be your baby.
They need to be your dog.

They need structure.
They need leadership, rituals, movement, and calm.
Not just a quick walk or a game of fetch in the yard, but real, meaningful activity that speaks to who they are.
They need to use their nose, their body, and their mind.
They need to feel useful, secure, and understood.

They need welfare that actually supports their biology, not just comfort that feels good to us.

They need to be seen for who they are, not who we wish they were.

The fur baby trend feels loving. But it creates emotional and behavioral chaos.
Not because we don’t care.
But because we stopped asking what the dog truly needs.

We love them so much we forgot to lead them.
And now they are struggling in silence.
Dressed up. Doted on. Deeply misunderstood.

If you really love your dog, don’t just call them family.
Learn what family looks like to a dog.

That is how we put the well back in welfare.

07/24/2025

07/22/2025

The Little Things Are the Big Things - the behavior blue print

Most people focus on the bite, the lunge, the growl, the meltdown.

But behavior doesn’t start there.

It starts with the small moments you don’t think twice about:

🔸 Your dog nudges your hand for attention, and you give it
🔸 They jump on the couch without being invited
🔸 They rush out the door ahead of you
🔸 They ignore you the first time you call their name
🔸 They bark to come inside, and you open the door
🔸 They whine when you stop petting them, and you keep going
🔸 They hover when you’re eating or push into your space
🔸 They get amped when the leash comes out, and you clip it on anyway

None of these seem serious on their own. But together, they create a dog who learns to influence the world through pressure, emotion, or persistence. Those habits don’t disappear when things get stressful. They show up stronger.

A lot of people come to me asking for help with the big behaviors. They want the lunging to stop. The reactivity to go away. The aggression to disappear. But what they often don’t realize is how much the small moments are shaping those outcomes.

If you want to change the big things, you have to change the little things.

Behavior is built in the quiet moments.
Respect is shaped through small choices.
Clarity starts at home, every single day.

Start small. Stay consistent.
That is how you stop the big stuff from happening.
And it is also how you begin to fix it when it already has

07/18/2025

I don’t even know how to write this anymore.

Because every time I try, it sounds like I’m trying to prove something.
Or educate.
Or convince.

But I’m not.
I’m just hurting.

Because I see it everywhere.
Dogs who are struggling in a hundred different ways.
Some bark. Some bite. Some won’t move. Some never stop. Some destroy things. Some don’t want to be touched. Some never want to be left alone. Some hide. Some never really sleep.
Some stare at you with this heaviness behind their eyes, and you just know
they’re not okay.

And everyone keeps saying it came out of nowhere.
Or that the dog’s just weird.
Or that it’s anxiety and then they medicate it and never ask why it started in the first place.

Remember lockdown?
Same four walls. Same routine.
Pacing the house.
Staring out the window, waiting for something to change.
Restless. Heavy.
And that was only a few months.

Most dogs live like that for years.
No hobbies. No purpose. No clarity.
Just fences. Floors. Silence.
And us.

And somehow we expect them to be okay.

And the worst part
they still love us.

They still sit next to us.
They still follow us.
They still try.

But not because they’re okay.
Because they have no choice.
We made ourselves their whole world and most of us never built a world worth living in for them.

We gave them a backyard. Some toys. A few walks.
We told ourselves that was enough.

But it’s not.

And they are carrying the cost of that every single day.
And I see it.
And I feel it.
And it’s breaking me.

Because no matter how many ways I try to say it
most people won’t listen.
And the dogs can’t speak.

So here I am.
Saying it anyway.
Again.

Not for you.
For them.

07/17/2025

Chaos Is Its Own Kind of Trauma

It doesn’t always look loud. Sometimes it looks loving.

Most people think of trauma as something violent or dramatic.
Something that leaves scars.
Something obvious.

But for a dog, trauma can come from something much quieter.
A house with no rules.
A life with too many choices and no guidance.
A world that looks safe to us but feels completely unpredictable to them.

Chaos, for a dog, is confusion.
It is the burden of trying to make sense of a human world without help.
And when there is no clarity, there is no peace.

When Nothing Makes Sense, the Dog Starts Guessing

Dogs don’t speak our language.
They don’t come programmed with our social norms.
They live in a world full of invisible expectations and emotional signals they don’t understand.

And when we don’t lead, they start filling in the blanks:
• “Maybe visitors are a threat.”
• “Maybe I need to block the baby from moving.”
• “Maybe following my owner everywhere keeps me safe.”
• “Maybe barking is the only way to protect myself.”

These aren’t behavior problems.
These are survival responses in a confusing world.
And confusion repeated over time builds anxiety, overreaction, and shutdown. That is trauma.

Rules, Boundaries, and Limitations Build Safety

People think structure is control.
But in the dog’s world, it is what makes things make sense.
• Rules teach what is allowed.
• Boundaries define what is safe, shared, and personal.
• Limitations help the dog regulate their energy, make better choices, and feel supported.

Structure doesn’t take away freedom.
It teaches the dog how to earn it.

When dogs are given freedom without leadership, they make choices that often lead to stress or conflict.
And eventually, the weight of trying to manage everything on their own breaks them down.

It All Looks Innocent Until It’s Not

Letting your dog choose how to move through the house.
Letting them decide when to engage or react.
Letting them follow you everywhere, sit on everyone, bark at whatever they want.
Letting them live in your space without ever teaching them how to respect it.

It all looks like love.
Until they start barking nonstop.
Until they lunge or growl at a guest.
Until they won’t settle or be alone.
Until they snap over something that seems small.

And the human says, “This came out of nowhere.”

But it didn’t.
It came from too much choice and too little guidance.

Freedom Is the Goal. But It Has to Be Earned.

Every being deserves autonomy.
Every dog deserves the ability to make choices, move confidently, and live a fulfilled life.

But when dogs are given freedom without understanding, it becomes a setup.
A setup for fear, overreaction, and dangerous decisions.
Not just for the dog, but for the people and animals around them.

The path to real freedom starts with clarity.
A dog can only safely make choices when they understand their world and feel secure in it.

The Hard Truth

Most people don’t want to understand the dog.
They want to love the pet.
They want to believe love and treats are enough.
But love without leadership is just noise.
It doesn’t regulate the nervous system.
It doesn’t teach emotional control.
It doesn’t create stability.

Dogs need more than comfort.
They need meaning.
They need rhythm.
They need someone who will lead them through a world that is foreign and overwhelming.

This Isn’t About Obedience. It’s About Welfare.

If your dog is struggling, don’t just look at behavior.
Look at clarity.
Look at how many choices they are making on their own every day.
Look at whether you’re guiding those choices or reacting after the fact.

Because a dog that has to guess constantly will eventually guess wrong.
And by the time they do, the damage is already done.

07/03/2025

That jealous behavior? It’s not cute. It’s competition.

When your dog pushes between you and your partner…
Blocks another pet from getting affection or interjects themselves when you’re giving another pet affection…
Squeezes onto your lap every time someone gets near…

It’s not about love.
It’s not about “protecting” you.
It’s about demanding/claiming your attention, your touch, your presence.

And when we allow it, or worse, encourage it, we’re telling the dog:
“This attention is something you have to take. Something you might lose if you dont.”

That mindset creates problems.
Dogs that guard people.
Dogs that compete for affection.
Dogs that don’t know how to exist around others without getting tense, pushy, or anxious.

Even if it never turns into a fight,
it’s still not peace.

What starts out looking cute can quietly become a pattern of control.
The dog isn’t asking for love …they’re demanding it.
And when left unchecked, it creates:

🐾 Tension between pets
🐾 Guarding of people or space
🐾 Chronic low-level arousal and stress
🐾 A dog that never fully relaxes unless they’re in charge of the moment

So what do we do instead?

✅ Interrupt the behavior. Don’t let your dog wedge in or push others away
✅ Hold the space. You’re allowed to have moments that don’t involve your dog
✅ Reward calm neutrality, not demand for attention
✅ Create structure. Assigned spaces, clear rituals, and emotional clarity help dogs feel safe
✅ Be a calm, confident leader. That’s what creates real emotional security

Your dog doesn’t need more affection.
They need better boundaries around affection.

Because dogs don’t just want love…
They want to feel safe in it.
And safety doesn’t come from control.
It comes from leadership.

You don’t fix jealousy by giving more.
You fix it by giving better.