29/10/2024
TO BE OR NOT TO BE
A Rider's Parent.
This is for everyone that took their Child for their first pony ride...
You will take him/her to a stable yard where there will be little Saints, aka School Ponies, patiently waiting to bewitch your Child on the spot!
You will then go and buy a new crop, gloves and spurs, a used helmet, boots and jods and your Child will walk into said yard like they are the next champion Equestrian Athlete. And you will follow your Child beaming from ear to ear, because your Child has found something to be passionate about, without being egged on to go "outside and play".
The Instructor promptly removes the spurs and give them back to you... Congratulations, you just bought the first of many useless horsey gadgets!
Then, your Child will probably spend hours begging you to go out to the yard to take carrots to the School Ponies or go and watch, or even ride, in a Training Show, even though you may want to sit on the couch and watch TV or have other plans. Your Child will insist. And that insistence will win.
And then that used helmet, boots and jods will no longer suffice... So off to the tack shop you go, only to walk out with a brand new helmet, boots, two sets of jods and riding shirts, a new crop, (because the first one got left behind next to the arena when the Instructor took it away because the saintly pony did not need encouragement to go fast), a jacket, t-shirts and pony stickers and a poster. Oh, and a grooming kit, even though your Child does not own a pony... YET!
And then life as you know it will end! You have taken the right fork in the road!
The next thing you end up leasing a pony that someone's else's Child outgrew... And you go and buy a second hand saddle and and 2 coloured numnahs. One for every day use and one for "when I ride in a show one day".
Now you realised the fork in the road was not left and right, it was right and wrong!
Welcome to the life of an Equestrian Athlete Parent! EAP for short, because that is the sound you will make when your Child and pony barrel around the arena, ears flattened (the pony's) and teeth bared (the pony's) and a grin from ear to ear (your Child's).
You are now the anxious parent standing next to the warm up or show arena. You are now the parent that has to hold THAT pony while your Child walks the course, traipsing behind the Instructor diligently counting steps but totally clueless why!
There will be no more lazy weekends watching TV or leisurely braais. You will see more sunrises and sunsets than you ever thought possible.
Then you will spend days and weekends
hauling buckets and bags and stinky horse and human clothes and boots and crazy horse gadgets after your Child. You will always have an open cold drink in your hand and it will feel like you work at Macdonald's Drive Through as you offer sips over the fence...
You will get a towing vehicle, with lots of space, and a horse box...
And your house will be a mess with the saddle taking centre stage in your lounge. And your car will be dirty and smelly...
Your weekends will be spent either freezing, rain soaked or burning to death, or all three combined, running after your Child as they move from the Dressage, to the Showing, to the Showjumping Arenas.
You just pay and pay for shows and your Child collects rosettess and feeds that little Satan's Spawn (which started off as that sweet pony you are leasing) bags full of carrots.
You and your Child make new Friends that will go to hell and back with you because Equestrian sport is a roller coaster ride with elation, jubilation and heartache all in one.
Your washing machine becomes the most reveered object in your house, because it has to cope with muddy, oily and hairy clothes, numnahs, blankets and boots! You learn quickly what to use to get those white sh*ts, jods and numnahs snow white after your Child fell off in the red mud. Sometimes the pressure cleaner has to step in to do laundry duty...
And then that Satan's Spawn is too small for your Child's ambitions. He becomes the sweet pony that gets passed on to the next starry eyed Child. Shame...
The search is on for the "First Pony", and boy oh boy, you have to read between the lines... The pretty ones are usually the worst to ride and the "will take your Child far" means far away, maybe the next town when the little sh@t takes off with your Child! Or "eager to please" because it runs in circles around you when you try and tack it up. Or "experienced" means it knows how to do the barest minimum and knows just how to buck your Child off and still look cute!
Then comes the first horse, and second, and third... You buy more outfits, saddles, kit, funny gadgets, lotions, potions and you are on WhatsApp groups for lessons, shows, tack shop sales and equestrian socials. And during all of this you just keep on buying carrots day by day.
You spend hours encouraging your Child and hugging them tight when they experience disappointment or elation.
All of a sudden, your Child becomes this responsible, nature loving, empathic, kind, self assured, generous (etc) human that makes you proud beyond belief! You stop adding up what it costs you to maintain this young Equestrian Athlete's passion but start adding up the blessings that it bought into your household.
Because you took that Child for it's first pony ride, you changed him/her for the good. It instilled values and norms in that Child that nothing else would have.
Because you took your Child for it's first pony ride, you have made new Friends and move in a totally different social group.
Your old Friends still spend their weekends at whatever team sport on a Saturday morning and on their couches watching TV or braaing while you see the Country travelling to shows and learning which accommodation is closest and cheapest to the show venue. And you just keep on making new Friends!
Then one day, many years from now, your Child might become you and take their Child for their first pony ride...
Louise Schaap
Proud Equestrian Athlete's Mother
