24/10/2023
I am the most permanent thing I have in my life.
A weirdo, but real.
An over thinker, a much too much feeler.
A doer at most (if not at all) times.
--
My actions and the things I speak are influencial.
And even within a room full of art, I'd still look at myself in a mirror, mouthing or internalizing a self made compliment...
I am actually proud, of who I have turned out to be in both mental and physical capacities.
Usually referring to how good I look, and how great I've been feeling through a reflection, I own that compliment now on how together, my entire being, mannerism, demeanor and confidence seem to be throughout my self expression within this world.
Keep being you. Somebody will feel it.
I honestly used to be scared, intimidated, frustrated, and exhausted, from being me. The authentic, non dimmed numbed hidden version... She's made statements when entering spaces even since young, and can keel a good conversation with a many unique individuals.
She's been ruffling feathers amongst her immediate crowd though. She could feel it a long time coming.. Most, don't like being shown areas of growth when they're stuck (or lacking) in their comfort. Which, I've taken upon myself throughout the years, to unorganically harden in character, as to not upset or be caught up in down spiral conversationa of others.
I've been holding myself together, as I need me in everything I do. I've been keeping to myself, in the unique process.
It hasn't been easy, and remained rather lonesome when it came to trusting
It's evident, not many are prepared to put in the mental work to remain decent human beings within their actionable lives.
I think, I've become dangerous now.
Or have in the process of becomim me, again, grown into a remarkable woman.
I'm far from perfect, my flaws and insecurities worn on my skin with no where to hide.
°My choices led me to where I stand,/sit here tonight.
"°Last day of being this age, is seemingly more quiet than I expected.
°There is nothing wrong with me. There's no fault in being me. There's no right nor wrong through unconventional means of thriving forwards.
