Heartfelt Horsemanship

26/03/2025

The myth of stallion behavior...

The horse I was riding bridleless in this photo was a 7 year old breeding stallion.
On the other side of that single pole arena fence was a herd that included 7 mares.
I didn't use obedience training to get him to "obey" me in the presence of mares and other horses.
He is not the only stallion I have had that could be handled and ridden without " aggressive behavior".
Not all of them have been mine, and they have been from every breed and discipline.

If this has been the case with so many stallions, why is it generally accepted that stallions are crazed beasts that need to be handled like an MMA fight?

I don't "train" stallions any differently to other horses.
The variable here is that the stallions that have been in my care over the years have their species appropriate needs met.

This guy lived in a herd of other stallions and geldings. They would mutual groom and play often.

The primary reason for what people call
" stallion behavior' is a horse that has been kept in isolation for long periods of it's life.

Horses... all horses, are herd animals.

I know people tell themselves stories about how "stallions don't live with the herd in the wild".
This is just plain untrue.

Stallions are fully present members of wild herds, whether mixed gender herds or bachelor herds.
They even handle foal care duties.

I have seen two sides of this discussion online, with one defending a highly stressed stallion as " just stallion behavior", and the other side saying " that stallion just needs discipline".
I have a hard time with both sides of this. Harsh training to suppress a horses behavior is probably worse than just ignoring it. To punish behavior that has it's roots in needs not being met is grossly unfair.

Is it not time we considered how stallions are housed and handled?
If how we currently house and handle them makes them dangerous amd unhappy, why do we have to stick to it?

24/03/2025

Is peer pressure in the horse world the reason for the lack of safety?
I have had a few interactions with students over the last week that had me ask myself this question.
I deal with safety and confidence issues on a daily basis, and much of the time I look for the mechanics behind what a rider or handler is doing that results in unsafe behaviour. Much of the time I am reiterating what I have already taught the student, and I do understand that it takes repetition for new behaviours to become second nature, so I try to patiently correct the person and encourage them to get repetitions in place.
It has, however, been a theme through my career that students are bullied and flooded with unsolicited advice by more conventional riders. The riders offering this advise normally have far worse issues to deal with, with their own horses, but use their "experience" as a tool to pressure the student.
"Just get on and ride!", "Hospital or back on", and "Falling off is just a part of riding horses" are some of the things that get forced onto riders trying something differently.
None of these statements have any virtue. I know those taught this way will tell me that if you don't get back on immediately you will have a permanent fear of horses. This is simply not true. Getting back into a dangerous situation after you have just been hurt is more likely to cause compounded PTSD than it is to increase your bravery, but the biggest fault with this mentality is that it reinforces the habit of not addressing what went wrong. There is always a reason for a fall. If the horse bucked, spooked, reared or bolted, anxiety or pain are likely the reasons. This needs to be addressed before a rider gets back on.
I have a long list of regular students that are either coming back to riding after years of not wanting to do it, or were on the brink of quitting, because of these "mottos "of the equestrian world. I have students that have taken years to rebuild their confidence after they got back on after a fall, only to end up in the hospital after remounting. It is just plain lack of common sense.
So, why do others pressure people on a different path to do what they do?
From safety point of view, you will hear them saying things like: "well I have done that my whole life and I am fine". These are the same people who post meme after meme about their daily regiment of ibuprofen and how long it takes for them to walk up straight after getting out of bed.
Someone making an effort to be safer makes them subconsciously feel that they need to defend what they have always done. This, as always, comes down to cognitive dissonance. Someone else having success doing something different challenges their core beliefs, and our brains are wired to defend those core beliefs, for fear of having to relearn everything we know.
This also applies to welfare issues. For example, someone considering a horses anxiety, pain or natural needs, will highlight that they may not be considering those crucial aspects. Without saying a word to them, they may feel under attack out of sheer guilt. What better way to defend themselves from your non-existent attack than trying to discredit science.
I recommend finding a supportive group of people that follow the same principles as you do, and running your doubts by your instructor. I realise the number of instructors offering empathetic training techniques means many people get occasional in person lessons and regular online lessons, but trust me, your horsemanship instructor has heard every bullying tactic in the book 1000 times and can reassure you. Even with this it takes a fair amount of willpower and resilience to stand up to these attacks. These viewpoints still exist purely because they have been oppressively protected in the face of overwhelming evidence that they have no place in the modern world...Your resilience and asking for support could be the thing that helps make them an embarrassing memory, rather than a continuing safety concern!

If you are looking for online empathetic lessons ( empathy for horse and rider) , drop me an email [email protected]

18/03/2025

Don't fight their lungs...

I see a fair number of horses presenting with "problem behaviors" where the rider is simply pushing a horse beyond their understanding, or beyond their fitness.
I discuss the understanding aspect a lot, but I probably don't cover the fitness enough.

A horse has a physical capacity, just like us, except that they are more likely to tip into flight mode and exceed their physical capacity.
Humans have historically used this for athletic pursuits, but it does result in break down at some point, in some way.
It also makes for an extremely dangerous situation for a human sitting on the back of a few hundred kg's of rippling fear.
These days we are seeing a shift to being more aware of a horses state of mind, which is great, but it does require a shift in how we train their bodies.
I make an effort to give horses rests between tasks, and don't ask for more until they have regained their breath.

I also increase workload incrementally. I get a horse good at a walk before I ask for a few strides of trot. I slowly build the time they can carry trot, and then progress to canter.
This doesn't happen in days or even weeks, but months.
I used to work towards a horse walking trotting and cantering within a months training, and some horses did fine with this, but most didn't.
At that stage I also believed most horses would buck on their first ridden canter. I don't think this is coincidence. Those first canter bucks were a loud ' I can't do it' or 'this is physically too much for me'.
Slowing down the escalation of what I ask, has had first canter bucks disappear. If they were to come up I would immediately assume I had rushed things, either physically or emotionally. I would forgive myself and adjust, rather than 'ride out the bucks' like I used to.

The next time your horse is huffing and puffing and you feel the urge to drive them on, stop, take a breath and imagine a spin class where if you stopped pedalling there was someone standing by to whip you to keep going.
Would you take it, or would you either try fight them or get away? If neither worked, but the session ended, would you ever set foot back in that spin class again?

Now think of your arena sour horse, or your horse that can't be caught, or the horse that resists saddling.

Are they being bad, or are they avoiding torture?

16/03/2025

Things I learned training a wild Zebra...

I think people see photos and videos of Ziyo and assume she was hand reared.

Ziyo was 3 months old and wild when her mother died. You can't get a more honest, and less coerced experience than what I had with Ziyo.

She never came with me when I left he reserve, but the lessons I learned I will carry for ever.

Those lessons have helped me help so many traumatized horses.

So many horses in general, but it gave me such a deep insight into trauma.

The biggest lesson related to connection above coercion.

I tried getting Ziyo to take food from me those first few days after her mother died.

She wouldn't take it. Firstly, she didn't know what it was, and secondly I was predator.

Me getting vital nutrition into her took me changing her mind about me being a predator. It took connection.
To me.
Once she let me touch her I could get feed in to her, but she was so guarded while she ate I couldn't interfere at all around food, because I might risk her not eating.

Why would a wild Zebra need food? She was only 3 months old in the middle of winter. She would have died without s
omething to replace her mothers milk.
The next thing she taught me was that not all aversives are equal, and sometimes even the same aversive presented in a different way wasn't equal.

I couldn't use positive reinforcement for her.
She went into a heightened alertness when food was around.

I initially thought the Ziyo experience would be a great opportunity to hone my positive reinforcement skills, but she said otherwise.

How little aversive was needed was an eye opener, and I have since found the same for traumatised horses and horses with high levels of anxiety. Even the horses that shutdown from anxiety ( Yes, your "quiet" horse that blows up ouy of nowhere is likely VERY anxious).
There was, however, a flipside.

When I was in tune with her the same aversives that had her get worried or reactive, where just communication.

The reason I thought positive reinforcement was going to be the best option was that I worried ANY pressure would break down relationship.

I couldn't have been further from the truth.

If I had more time with her I would have likely started to use more positive reinforcement, because it speeds up learning, but only once she was more relaxed.

This experience came at a time when I had become far more open to Positive reinforcement done well. I realized that just about every negative perception of Positive reinforcement I had, was related to it done poorly.

My relationship with Ziyo taught me a whole lot about when rather than how.

It's not about whether an approach is right or wrong, it's about when to use which tools.
I am now a big believer in positive reinforcement for behavior shaping, but only once solid foundations of relaxation are in place.
I had dived deeper into the neurochemistry of why this is the case, and come out with a different perspective on behavior and connection.

Remember, there's no rundown that could hold Ziyo, I couldn't coerce or force her into anything. Neither force, not food.
Only connection.

14/03/2025

Okay, no-one wants my feet pics.. And let's face it... Who has money for feet photos?

I have always had a hard time saying no o helping horses, and the people that love them, when finances are the limiting factor.

Unfortunately, this has had a terrible effect on my own financial situation.
Over the last 6 to 8 months the numbernof queries that end with " I really need the help, but I just can't afford it' have increased dramatically.
I simply don't have the financial buffer to work for free, or in many cases incur costa to help, so I have been looking at ways to help without incurring travep costs.
So, I am accepting a limited number of monthly online students.
I will be providing low cost weekly video coaching sessions to selected students.
Students will be selected based on their dedication and most urgent cases first.
I will, of course, try get to the more "dangerous' horses ( read defensive) in person, but I have had great success helping people remotely with most topics.

If you are interested in Video coaching, drop me a message and we will see if you are a good fit for the process.

I also still have my patreon page available for those that have dobe in person clinics or lessons in the past.
It isn't as easy to navigate as our website, or as guided as video coaching, but it is by far the cheapest option to access information.

I promise I am trying to help those that are struggling economically.

11/03/2025

Are expectations really the "mother of all stuff ups?"
A more ... Um.. "Expressive" form of this statement was something I carried with me from my days working in corporate.
A fair portion of working in sales is managing expectations.
The idea is if you under promise and over deliver, you will always have happy, long term clients.
The thing is, that opening quote has a word missing. No, not the expletive.
UNREALISTIC expectations are the mother of all stuff ups!
Expectations are a part of every healthy relationship.
They only become a problem when they are either unrealistic, or aren't clearly communicated..
Some people talk about boundaries, I prefer to talk about expectations.
Boundaries are solid and immovable, but expectations have wiggle room.
You can take circumstances into account, and adjust expectations accordingly.
I find having a horse understand what we expect of them, and ensuring that the expectation is within their capacity, creates a sense of peace for the horse.
Exactly like it would with a human. If you were employed to sit at a table and hand out programs at a show, and you had no other tasks required of you, you would be pretty confident in your ability to meet those expectations. Even if you were socially awkward, you would be within your comfort zone. Being sat at that same table, with the same programs, but not being told what was expected of you would have you constantly worried you are doing the wrong thing.
There is a perception that any expectations are a bad thing, and I might have contributed towards this perception, by not including the "unrealistic" part in the past.
Expectations that consider the horses' surroundings, their history, their current state of mind and their relationship with you, are all perfectly fine.
Healthy expectations are a part of every healthy relationship.
Expectation does not equate to exploitation.

28/02/2025

My friend across the ocean Adam Sewell has been a great motivator to get me to do a webinar on this topic.
Wifi has been dodgy so we didn't do a live webinar, but if you are interested in the topic, the link is below
10 Myths

Get access to ethical horsemanship courses at your fingertips!

23/02/2025

Introducing "The Path To Calm”
Mastering true relaxion, a revolutionary online course that will transform your understanding and interaction with horses.

heartfelthorsemanship.org

18/02/2025

So, I bit the bullet and we launched an online course.
I don't think people realize how big a deal this is for me.
I love working face to face with horses and their people.
I have also spent years feeling inadequate. Comparing myself to other professionals and the material they have available.
Enter Talya Mari as the voice of (incessant) reason.
I might not have any olympic medals in my future, but I have never met a horse that I couldn't calm.
Talya kept driving this home.. So our first course is " The Path to Calm".
I don't say ' our' flippantly.
Without Talya this course would never have happened. From filming, to editing to the website and course hosting.. She did EVERYTHING! I gave my knowledge.. She did everything else ( she hasn't slept in a week!)
If you have a relatively calm horse,
there is still information in this course that will benefit you.
It's the science and the magic behind relaxation and connection.
If you were to ask me who it's for.. It's for those that value safety and the happiness of their horses above all else.
You can find the course on the Heartfelt Horsemanship website
heartfelthorsemanship.org

14/02/2025

Imagine this....

You carry your saddle out to your horses' paddock and hang it on the fence.
The horse spots you and the saddle and walks up excitedly.
You put on the head gear, give the horse a quick groom, and saddle up.
Your horse stands perfectly. Shows no discomfort through the girth being done up.

You run through a little groundwork, just making sure your horse is sound and happy.

The horse is engaged and interested in every part of this process.

You climb into the saddle and your horse stays with you. Engaged, but relaxed.
You run though a quick foundation ride, then head out on the trail. On a completelty loose rein, your horse is happy to move forward wherever you ask it, and doesn't try rush ahead. You find a nice place for a big, forward trot, ask, and your horse goes up at the most subtle request, and when you are done trotting you bring the horse back down with the same level or subtle cue.
A deer jumps out of the brush and your horse has.a look, then keeps walking calmly.
You come to a beautiful place for a gallop. You ask the horse and you get everything they have. You feel the exhilaration of all the horses power coursing through your body, but you don't even once consider the possibility that the horse will get worried and run off, trip or spook. You are confident in every stride and every turn. The kind of confidence that doesn't come from bravado, but from knowing. Deep, meaningful knowing.
When you get home, you untack, put the horse back in their paddock and they hang out with you a little while before running off to the herd.
This is what it can be. It doesn't have to be an adrenaline sport waiting for the "when you fall" not the " if you fall".
This is why our first course on heartfelthorsemanship.org is about relaxation. There are sexier, more fashionable things to teach people, and we have some cool courses coming up, but we recommend everyone start on the rock solid foundation of relaxation.

The fun stuff sneaks up on you when you realise you have a happy and confident horse, that loves being with you. It just comes easy.

If you love horses for something like the above story.. Check out "A Path to Calm"

If you have had a profound change with an anxious horse using Heartfelt Horsemanship techniques, please tell us your story below.
Just think of helping other have that same experience.. If you comment, like and share tho post, more people get to experience the magic of a relaxed, connected horse.

08/02/2025

A Path to Calm

The first priority when developing a horse is relaxation.
This step is often skipped to get to the "exciting stuff" quicker.
This, generally, results in things getting too exciting, too quickly.

Bucking, rearing, spooking and bolting are common results of an anxious horse being asked to perform tasks they don't understand.

The industry sometimes dismisses these behaviors as "just part of riding". We are told that to enjoy the privilege of riding horses we just have to accept the dangers. That you're not a good rider until you have fallen ten times.

As someone who works with troubled horses for a living, with years since my last fall, and my overall fall count in decades of work still low, and I have riding horses that I have owned for 10 years and never had anyone fall from. I don't agree that falls are inevitable. They are only inevitable when we don't address the anxiety or pain that is at the root of 90% of riding accidents.
Sure, there are technical falls in certain sports, but even those could be reduced by having a horse more relaxed.
It shouldn't be controversial to say that falls are too common, and they can be reduced by addressing anxiety in horses.
This course looks to balance the science, soul and sense of relaxation.
It's not all science, but the science gives us the why behind what we do, and if we know why we do something, we know when to do it.
It's not all soul, but the soul connection with a living animal helps us spot when they are not in a thinking state, and that keeps us safe.
It's not all sensibility, but practical application of the science and soul takes us beyond the laboratory and into real world situations, because a happy, calm horse is better whether you are riding a mountain side, roping calves, jumping 110's or doing a 100 miler.
"Horses are no spooky and unpredictable, they are unprepared, and their humans are unaware"

Sign up for "A Path to Calm" at
heartfelthorsemanship.org

07/02/2025

Ask me anything Friday...

We're adding something a little different today.
You can ask me your behavioral questions as usual, but you can also ask questions for an " interview" of sorts.

I am a little shy to talk about myself and my origin story nd people keep asking. I tend to do a summary and rush through....
So if you want to know more about my education, my equine background or " where did he come from, where did he go?", drop it in the comments and specify " for interview.
We will put them all together and have Talya Mari ask them on Camera.
As always.. If feel the answers and questions below were of value, I do appreciate the " send a gift" or "stars" function on Facebook...
There is, however, no obligation.. If your horse ate your last 10 dollars and you can' t offer anything.. I will still answer your question....
Also, pleeeease check out heartfelthorsemanship.org
And... Go!

05/02/2025

Is intuition the Holy Grail of horsemanship?

I certainly believe it is.

With a well placed BUT for balance.

Look at it like this;

If you were going to get on one of those little planes that take 6 passengers, and look like they need a push start, would you want a highly intuitive, well-educated pilot flying it, or would you be happy with your highly intuitive best friend with zero aviation knowledge flying it? I mean you trust yoir best friend, don't you? You have known them a long time and you share a bunch of secrets destined for the grave.
I'd choose the educated pilot
Where this goes a little fuzzy in the equine industry is that we still have equestrian education steeped in tradition rather than science. So when someone with a strong sense of critical thinking comes across this form of "education", they very quickly figure out it goes against intrinsic equine behavior. Often this results in someone choosing to trust their own intuition over the available information.
It's hard to argue the reasoning.
Especially when information about a horses nervous system, their neurochemistry, species appropriate needs and simple behavioral science is drowned out by that counterintuitive traditional education.
At least in the ' in-person" field.
Please don't get me wrong, there are valuable lessons from some traditions. The trouble arises when that traditional information is centered around the human, not the horse.
Anthropocentric training and management create a safety concern for both the horse and humans.
Housing horses in an environment that is convenient for humans has health implications for the horse.. Riding a horse that is neurochemically imbalanced because their species appropriate needs aren't met, puts the rider at risk when the horses goes over threshold.
So, I do understand intuitive people shrugging off this education.
I do, however, encourage people to seek out the wealth of information now available.
Yes, you are unlikely to find it at every corner stable yard, and google is a minefield, but with son discernment you can find something with a solid science back that resonates with you.
There is a program for every priority.
If you prioritize a safe and happy horse, or if you want flashy movement and high responsiveness, there is a program around that will give you warm fuzzies. Dive in and Dive deep.
If you feel something you are being taught sounds a little fishy... Do some research. Learn to discern where to learn.
Look for peer reviewed studies and take. close look at their methodology.
Equitation Science International are. great source of TRUE equine science..
Then .. Let your intuition ride the wave of solid information.
There is a line in a Paul Simon song that goes:
'Trust your intuition, it's just like going fishing,
You cast your line then you get a bite'

If the line is your intuition.. Then education is the fishing rod!
Feel free to check out our flavor of education at heartfelthorsemanship.org

02/02/2025

A Path to Calm ( online)

Is your horse spooky and unpredictable?
Does your horse display behaviors like bucking, bolting, or rearing?

If physical pain has been thoroughly ruled out then the likely cause of these behaviors is anxiety.
Anxiety is not something that can just be medicated away.
Nor is it something that needs to just be accepted, or have you give up on your horse.

Calming supplements may be effective if there is a deficiency, but most medications will have the horse build an increasing tolerance for the medication.

Addressing the root cause of anxiety is far more effective.
This online course covers the Neurochemistry of relaxation, the behavioral science of communication and the magic of connection.

Sign up at:
heartfelthorsemanship.org

31/01/2025

Ask me anything Friday...

Remember .. You can ask me anything.. In the comments.. My hope is that your question, and my answer help more people than just you.
Just like last week.. If you feel inspired Facebooks" send a gift" and "stars" program are a great way go showing appreciation!

28/01/2025

I still want to hear more good stories.. Even if the world changed for one horse or one human..the world still changed

What gives you hope?
The last few days I have felt the urge to speak about things I have held back on. I don't regret the posts at all, and believe it is important to draw attention to potential growth points. (Let's try do so by addressing practices not people, most people are operating within the scope of what they know).
There was one very cool comment on one of these posts though.
A horsewomen worked at a large facility in Europe that had one of the harsh methods I spoke about as a standard practice. The great part is that she offered education on a better way and implemented kinder practices that are still in place, long after her departure.
These are the stories we need, to balance things out, when we feel the need to address the injustice in the equine industry.
So.. If you have a story that gives you hope, please share it with me. I know positive change is coming and has already started.
Positivity turns toxic when we suppress the bad stuff, but it is also toxic to focus only on what's wrong.. Lets do some balancing today!