02/12/2024
BROKEN LEGS~Shattered barn~BUT IT DIDNT BREAK MY SPIRIT
Today marks 5 years since I broke both of my legs and shattered the bones in my feet. Feb 11, 2019
14 hour surgery 2 days after the incident just to get the bones in my feet to stop folding in on each other. My right foot was so bad they almostst amputated it. My chances of ever walking again were low.
7 days in harbor view and another 4 days following a MCL and tibial plateau surgery at UW hospital. After all of this I returned to my barn.
In just weeks all of my employees quit expect 1, and half my barn walked out.
đź’šđź’šđź’šđź’šđź’šđź’šđź’š
As I was going through my journal tonight I came across this.
Written by me in April 2019
And wow this is more true than ever.
The journal of a horse trainer
This week is the second week starting our jump camp. The camp I organized prior to breaking both my legs. A camp which many of our students plan to attend and I’m at suppose to lead.
Upon start of the week to this three day camp I went through our barn “equipment” trying to accumulate tack to pay our debts for the last few months I’ve been out of work. It’s been a journey.
We give our hearts as trainers to the people in our horsey world the most. And on my journey, breaking my legs showed me just how much those people chose to give back.
In all of the clients I have lost and gained, the ones that hurt the most, are the ones I get the closest with and have left in the weakest of times. A majority in the last two months have stayed waiting patiently for my recovery, but a few have fallen aside.
Broken legs, broken relationships. I give my whole backbone everyday to help all of those in my circle and when I broke my legs it’s almost as if my circle had no wholeness. I was what kept the circle in tact. And when I broke, it broke.
So now, I’m gathering the pieces of those who fell, and those who are looking for support, and I will press onward. Broken legs and all, to show those who held strong, waiting for me to recover, and help them in the best I am able. And those who fell and those who left, it’s okay because I was weak and you needed strength. I didn’t have it, and you needed to find it.
No I’m not mad, I’m thankful, because those of you who left were the weakest links in the circle and as much as I care to hold tight to the weak links, truly this circle becomes stronger with the stronger links that didn’t bend or bust as the circle reformed.
My circle will be stronger, the links tighter, the care more from the heart. And when I walk again and my legs are healed I will come back whole. More whole than the circle could have ever felt or imagined before. I’m here to give to those around me. I am a trainer and although I can’t show with my actions now, trust my words, and my actions have shown before, they will again even more.
Camp is tomorrow and I have many students signed up, knowing these feet can’t help but this knowledge will. Camp will go on, as will I, heart intact and integrity to give all I can.
