03/14/2022
Now this is pretty funny 🤣
Have you thought about quitting your day job to train and sell horses? Here are ten, no make that eleven, good reasons to reconsider that career change.
1. Your weekends will be shot.
It seems like the majority of the horse-buying world’s population works Monday through Friday. That means the only time people can shop for a horse is on the weekends. No more weekend plans for you with your family and friends. And they usually call at 5pm Saturday night as your headed out the door to dinner, for the first time all week not smelling of manure with shavings in your hair. Might as well get a restaurant job instead, because if you’re going to work on the weekend, at least you’ll have a steady source of income and be able to score free meals.
2. No matter how many good horses you sell, people will always remember you for that ONE incident when they came to see a horse. You know the time, they rolled in the mud with the saddle or suddenly got terrified of the fly spray bottle they see daily.
What’s the first thing you think of when you hear the name Bill Clinton? I can almost guarantee it’s not how he ran our country.
3. You will always end up with that one horse who stays skinny and lame no matter what you do.
No one wants a lame bag of bones — you won’t even be able to give him away and the client who sent him to you, will always claim, to be innocent and they don't think he's skinny...as you count every rib. You will be stuck with him until you give up and pour hundreds of dollars of your own money into said horse. And the seller will always think it looks fine, he's just fit....BS, he's skinny lady and it’s cost me tons in supplements to get him looking better. Or better yet the one that sends the horse, lame, injured or sick. She’s always sound the owner says as you and the shipper look at its recent cuts, wounds and bowed tendon. Yeah right?!
4. Everyone already “knows” how to ride.
That is, until they get to your place and fall off. But in court they’ll cry to the judge that they were bucked off and your horse was crazy. They seem to forget that you all but refused to let them try the horse and you told them not to lope it and ask for a rollback. It rolled back, they didn't.
5. People love to buy for color.
Yes, you might have the perfect bay-colored gelding for their son, but they insist on the flashy paint stallion that is 15 years old and still won’t let the vet close enough to be gelded.
6. People will use you as an opportunity to get in a free ride.
Of course they’re interested in Pancho the Wonder Horse: it’s 70 degrees, sunny and a Saturday. You brought your whole family in shorts and flip flops? Maybe the horse trailer is hidden behind your mini van? After your whole family got in a ride, you’re going to go home and think it over and promise to call us right back? Let me hold my breath.....
7. People will be forever tied to you.
And if they love the horse they bought, they'll drop you a note or call or text maybe once a year, if you’re lucky but if for some reason the are not happy, they'll be sure to post it on ever social media site there is, AND never even attempt to call you and ask for help.
8. You will cringe every time the phone rings on a holiday or vacation.
Do you answer it, even though it's Christmas Day? One part says, Heck no, the other says, well some don't celebrate Christmas and if you don't answer the phone, they will call on the next horse, so you answer it.........and yes, ask my family, I really have answered buyer calls on Christmas from buyers and sold horses on it too.
9. People will ask all the questions you’ve already answered explicitly in the ad.
“Offered for sale: 16h chestnut Thoroughbred gelding.” “How tall is he and what color is he?” 🤦♀️
10. People will be your best friend and recommend you to everyone, until their horse is not perfect.
Until the horse does something horse-like, ya know, like trip or roll in mud or snort at a butterfly and then the whole world will know how horrible a person you are but they still will never call you direct, after all that would be too easy.
11. Almost every horse you have for sale will stay sound and blemish free until the morning the potential buyer is out to look at them.
It’s a law of physics. What’s up must eventually go down. What’s sound must eventually go lame. What’s clean will definitely get dirty.
Honestly, I love my job, it’s a blessing, but there are days slinging coffee at Starbucks sounds rather tempting 😉.
**I seriously can not believe I am having to say this, but….for heaven sakes, of course I didn’t force the horse in the photo to lay down in a mud puddle. And no, that’s not it’s pen. She happened to LOVE water and when turned out would run to any puddle or my pond to roll. She was NOT forced to lay in it, roll in it or even walk through it. She’s a horse, I can’t control where she rolls when turned out in my round pen, she likes water, she likes mud, she rolled in a puddle, she’s not abused or being punished 🤦♀️🤷♀️. And yes she was toweled off and blanketed with a cooler until dry afterwards.
