Tribute to Zesti

01/31/2024

Today, we spent about 12 hours on the clock. We were gone from the hotel from about 8:00AM until 7:30PM. It is just after midnight, and I am finally writing this post as I snuggle in bed at my hotel with Tribbi and Radar both under the blankets. Some people have strong feelings about if service dogs should sleep in bed, and I respect that, but for various reasons, this is what works for us. In Radar's case, he needs to sleep in bed in order to be able to fully perform his required tasks.

Anyways, yesterday (Monday), was pretty quiet. I went and got coffee at the Starbucks in the hotel with one of my friends who came on the trip from Wisconsin. I then came up to my room and took some introvert time until our 2:00 meeting during which we went over the legislation we are discussing with our representatives this year. This years's top priorities concern insuring that standards are set for the accessibility of websites, the importance of in-home medical devices with digital displays being accessible to the blind, and Social Security Disability Income back to work incentives to insure that blind people can reach their maximum potential in the workforce.

Meetings concluded at about 7:00PM, and six of our seven Wisconsin crew went out for seafood. I fell asleep shortly after getting to the hotel.

Tribbi did pretty well yesterday, and RAdar was his perfect little self. He's 8, and he's a solid reliable little guy. I healed Tribbi quite a bit yesterday, but she did well with the work I asked her to do. She successfully navigated the hotel lobby full of many other blind people tapping canes and working dogs. She is really good about indicating to me which of the elevators in the bank opens up for us. She knows where our room is and indicates all of the other doors we have gone through at the hotel including the Starbucks, the meeting rooms, and the hotel restaurant. When I healed her yesterday, it was mostly for me, not her. I'm glad I took this trip, but I am definitely a little bit less patient and less detail oriented than I would normally be since I am contending with the grief after losing my dear Sprocket on Sunday. I'm trying to train her and take care of myself, and it is a delicate balance.

So anyways, I told myself I was putting my trainer hat on for most of today, and she really did a lovely job. She is reliably indicating the curbs in and out of the street to walk over to the grass we are using for relieving. She is a nosey girl and likes to try to sniff poles, check in on other guide dogs, occasionally sniff people, and sometimes decides she must watch something that is none of her business. That's all okay right now, though. She's a young girl. I'm not allowing any of these behaviors to persist, but I am also not stressing myself out about them, because she is only nine months, and an environment like this is a ton for a girl her age. I've made sure I always have my cane with me, but I haven't had to get it out yet this trip.

Tribbi did really well going through security when we went to talk to our representatives this morning. There are three office buildings that house the 435 reps, and the buildings are connected by tunnels on the lower levels. Tribbi guided me through all of these halls. She is learning not to rush up on someone walking ahead of us. This is a behavior I usually would wait longer to work on, but we used it as a training opportunity. If she got too close to someone, I just sort of scuffed my foot and tapped the front of my leg and slowed her down. I would say that she was starting to get it by mid-morning. We had 8 meetings today with all of our Wisconsin representatives. I attended seven of those eight, and I only missed the last one because we had to split off and cover to appointments at the same time. Tribbi did better than I expected about guiding me in and out of all of the office suites, and she rested nicely under my chair at each one. She only let out a couple of soft little chuffs in one meeting. I think I was the only one who noticed, and I tried not to let it worry or frustrate me too much. Mid-day, I of course took the dogs out for a chance to relieve, and Tribs did well with coming back through security again.

Our meetings wrapped up at about 3:45, and we had a break until a reception at 5:00. That ran until 7:00, and then we finally came back to the hotel. Tribs has been a very sleepy baby since then.

Photos include a side and rear view of me working Tribbi, 2 front shots of me with both dogs, and two very tired Tribbi donuts...one on my bed and one on the floor in a friend's room.I think maybe she is a little bit tired tonight. We have two meetings in the morning, and then it is off to the airport to come back home.

01/29/2024

landing can be big scary, but again, the power of turkey insured no drama or worry. I love this video, just because you can hear the big crash bounce as we hit the ground. Tribbi was a little unsure, but she handled it well.

01/29/2024

Here is take off. Freeze-dried turkey insured it wasn't a big deal. Radar really wanted some, too.

01/29/2024

Meghan and Tribbi here reporting live from Washington DC. She's just ready enough to come along with me, but not ready to pull all of the responsibility I would normally ask of a guide on a trip like this. She's had about 7 harness workouts. I trust her to not drop me off of a cliff, walk into the street without my go ahead, or walk me into anything. I'm prepared to pick up any slack she needs me to while we are here. I have my cane with me at all times, so I can take over responsibility whenever needed.

I worked her through the little Madison airport. She showed me the escalator, and then she went through security. She was not interested in allowing the TSA agents to pat her down. Thankfully they were very understanding and patient. I had a very difficult day in which I said goodbye to my 15-year-old little rat terrier Sprocket prior to our travel, so I wasn't as attentive as I would normally be. I was really frustrated with myself for not thinking preventatively. I had intended to have treats so I could support her through it, but they were in my bag on the conveyer belt, so we made the best of it. We had about an hour wait at the gate. Tribbi's biggest weakness is vocalizing while in harness. She likes to let out little yips when she sees things, and sometimes she grumbles/growls under her breath. These are both things that will be cause for pulling her from service work if I cannot resolve them. She let out a couple of little woofs at the gate, but overall she did well. She guided me down the jet bridge and walked onto the plane.
Unfortunatley, without asking me first, the gate agent moved me from my window seat to a bulkhead seat. They felt she would have more room there, but I know her best, and she does best tucked away. All of my dogs have. After some discussion, I persuaded them to begrudgingly move me back to a normal window seat, and they were a bit abashed when she curled up and slid right under the seat. Maybe next time, they will believe someone when they say what works best for them.

I've included a couple of photos below. One is Tribbi and Radar at my feet at the gate resting quietly, and the other is Tribs tucked under the seat on the plane where she apparently doesn't fit.

Takeoff and landing can be very disconcerting the first time. I did have my trainer hat on for that, and gave her treats and lots of praise as she took it all in. I'm putting those two videos in the comments.

When we landed, I used my cane and didn't ask Tribbi to work through the DC airport, because I don't know it well enough to give her the guidance she would need. We got an Uber to the hotel, and I took the dogs to relieve. We came back to the hotel, they got their dinner, I caught up with friends and I passed out. Today is the calm day of the three. We're here to lobby for bills pertaining to blindness rights. I'll share more on that later.

PD: One photo is Tribbi sleeping on Meghan's foot at the gate. You can see little Radar, too. The second photo is an alert Tribbi under the seat on the airplane.

01/17/2024

Howdy people! It's been some time I know. This thing called snow, and this other thing called a windchill advisory have kept me and my trusty little beast trapped in the house for the most part. We've worked on shoing me cars that come to pick us up when Ubering too and from appointments, I spent some time teaching her to be careful on the ice while leaving a restaurant with a friend, and we have been doing lots of puzzle toys to tire out that busy busy little brain. Tribbi, Radar, and I are headed to Washington DC in about a week and a half, so I'm super bummed by the lack of training potential right now, but we'll get through it as I always do.

I'm excited to tell of our journey to our nation's capitol, but I'm struggling quite a bit, too, because I made this trip with Zesti and Radar last year, and I'm kind of stuck on the whole Zesti should be beside me still thought process right now. Here is a short currently untitled poem I wrote on a whim this morning. Pain really does produce my best work and seems to be the only way I can confront my emotions.

They say time makes loss easier,
But I find the pain grows worse.
The tick and tock of weeks and months,
Since my heart was hers.

Each day I face without her,
Knowing she should still be hear.
She would still be beside me,
At this time last year.

My destinations each remind me,
Of the places we had been.
She was my dearest treasure,
My haven, guide and friend.

I need to keep on trying,
And each day I always do.
I still grieve my sweet wise Zesti,
Moving on is so hard to do.

And on that cheery note, I'm out for now. Things should be warming up enough soon, and I will be back with training updates at that point.

01/08/2024

Date: 1/07/24
Workout #5

I'm up past midnight, so I guess that technically this was yesterday now, but since I'm still awake, I'm qualifying it as today.

We walked over to a local coffee shop that I have been going to with Tribs since she was a little puppy. I was excited to try this route with her, because it has a lot of more complicated things that I new would be pretty routine for her since she's been walking this route her entire life. We had to do a mid-block crossing at one point to get over to a bike path where we could go up onto a pedestrian overpass. Mid-block crossings are difficult, because there is no tactile indicator to the handler as to when to start looking for the crosswalk. Tribbi and I have walked past this crossing on most of our training routes, so I was really impressed when I asked her to look to the right, and she found the mid-block crosswalk. So much of guide dog handling at the beginning is body language. The way I asked her to look for this crossing was to slow my pace way down, angle my body to the right, and gesture with my right hand. All of this encourages her to move in that direction, but she waited to make that move until we were at the crossing. Most newby guides will turn into the grass as soon as I start gesturing right. She didn't make the move until the paved approach to the crosswalk was available.

Once we completed the mid-block crossing and started heading up the bike path, I started asking her to look for a left turn. She found the pedestrian overpass, and we wound our way up and over a busy street. On the way off of the overpass, we had to pass some barking dogs. Tribbi is a busy body and loves to look at things...to the point that sometimes we pass whatever it is and her neck is still craned back over her shoulder. I worked really hard on talking to and encouraging her at this stretch to prevent the goose-necking. I was mostly successful.

Tribbi veered a bit too far to the right, which was the direction that was safe to veer in, when completing one of our crossings today. I was able to tell her "Straight" and she did take the initiative to seek out the curb out of the street. She indicated the driveway entrance to the coffee shop to me, and she found the step up to the sidewalk, waited for me to get my footing and ask her to proceed, and then found the door into the coffee shop. I'm super pleased with her. I don't think she could do this kind of work in a new environment yet, but it is really neat to watch her take the reins around our usual stomping grounds.

01/07/2024

Date: 1/05/24
Workout #4

Sorry this is getting posted a day late. I had every intention of writing it up last night, but I was apparently too tired and fell asleep with the keyboard in my lap.

So yesterday, we walked to and from Walgreens. It is about a mile each way, so it was our longest workout yet. This is a route we have walked frequently throughout Trib's time with me, because my vet clinic is right over there, too.

WE continued to work on her right line of travel. She indicated all curbs to me, did a wonderful job guiding me down a path that cuts through the park, and once again slowed for the uneven sidewalk. We passed the parking lot of our last workout with it on her left this time, and she maintained her line of travel. I asked her to find inside at Walgreens, and she did so perfectly after nicely crossing over the parking lot. Once I got inside, I dropped her harness and got out my cane. I didn't think it was fair to ask her to do that level of work yet, because there were close clearances, and there were other shoppers walking around. She's showed some inherent awareness of obstacles, but she is far from ready to do something like a small store with with close quarters. Once I made my purchases, I did ask her to find outside, because I knew there was an obstacle-free path to the door. She nailed it, took me to the down ramp to cross the parking lot, found her way out of the lot back onto the sidewalk and remembered which way to turn to head home.

On our way back, there was a car that pulled out of a lot in front of us. I heard it and was about to stop, but Tribbi stopped before I could do so. What a good girl! Traffic is a very particular and precise part of training with a very slow building of expectations. It is important to not rush the process to make sure that the dog learns to respect traffic, but he or she should not fear the traffic. I'll go into that in much depth as we work our way towards that part of training, but this was a perfect response, and I was really excited that she offered it on her own.

I was trying to decide if we were going to get out to work today, but the reality is that my poor little feeties needed a rest. I went to a friend's kids' birthday party today, and I think that was enough of a mental workout for Tribs. She's a little bit unsure about small children running and zooming about, but she got some really good exposure today, and I think she was mentally exhausted from her 3 hours of observation this afternoon, so we stayed home the rest of the day. WEll, I guess that's not entirely true, but I didn't work her today. She just got to heel along while I ran a few errands. It's back to dragging my stumpy little legs along for her again tomorrow.

01/05/2024

Date: 1/04/24
Workout #3

Today, I took Tribs out for about 1.5 miles. She could have gone for more, but my shin splints said to come back home, so we did. We've of course been going on walks since she was a little pup, but it takes a different muscle set to work a guide dog, because along with following the dog's pull, you are at least to some degree resisting that pull as well. I'm trying to get up to at least 3 miles a day by this time next week.

Today, we reversed yesterday's loop and then added another few blocks that allowed us to walk past some heavy traffic. Tribbi did really well including holding her line of travel while we walked past some parking lots. IT is easy for the dog to lose the line of travel at points like that, because there is a little strip of sidewalk and a wide expanse of paved parking lot right along side it.The lot was to our right, and the grass line was to our left. This is the easier of the two approaches for the dog, because the grass line is on her side and is providing a clear line of travel. Dogs are a lot more likely to veer to the left when the lot is to the left, because they have a line of travel that is much less apparent.

I forgot to mention that yesterday, ai caught my toe on a lip in the sidewalk, and I almost fell forward. I showed Tribbi the spot by tapping my toe on the lip. Then I showed and taught her how to safely slow for uneven ground. I was astounded when a few blocks later, we encountered uneven sidewalk, and she slowed on her own. When a guide dog slows, it lets the handler know that something is changing. In the winter, the first thought is that there might be ice ahead. The dog could also be communicating that there is a narrow space ahead, they could be slowing for a down curb approach prior to a street crossing, or so many other things. In short, a dog who is slowing is always indicating that caution in footing and/or pace is necessary. Today, we encountered that same uneven sidewalk, and she once again showed it to me.

I am thinking about starting to teach some really basic obstacle work in the next few days. Tribbi's biggest weakness right now is giving me enough room on the sidewalk. To clarify, I am not considering this a fault, or a failure. She's doing an amazing job. I am just trying to think of the best tools to help to communicate her responsibilities to her in the most organic and unstressful way for her.

Tomorrow, I think we may do our first destination route. I think I need to pick up a couple of things up from Walgreens, and she has been there many times, so it will not be unclear to her where we need to go. I carried my cane once again for this route. I think I will be able to phase it out on some simple stretches pretty soon. I'm so pleased with my girlie!

01/03/2024

Date: 1/03/24
Workout #2

Today, I took Tribbi on her first somewhat lengthy workout. Yesterday was incredible, because I felt like I could throw my shoulders back, take a deep breath and follow my beautiful girl for the first time. WE went on about a mile-long loop today. My primary focus was to get her pulling at a steady pace and pull. I decided to see how she handed the approaches to the entrance and exits of street crossings. From the time she was a young puppy, she has been patterned to the up and down curbs, and in the last couple of months, she has definitely been reliably showing them to me while on leash. I wasn't expecting her to for sure nail the indications, because on leash, she had a lot more flexibility of movement, so she could more easily change her direction of movement when targeting the up and down curbs. The guide dog harness handle is rigid, so it restricts the dog's movement to some degree. You may be wondering "Why a rigid handle, then?" Though the handle does restrict the dog's movement, it also gives the handler much more precise feedback as the dog moves. This is especially true in lateral movements and when there are changes in elevation.

I live in a neighborhood where there are areas both with and without sidewalks. My house is on a street with no sidewalks. Sidewalkless or country travel is much more abstract and disorienting than sidewalk travel. I will dedicate a post to that in the future. I used my cane and heeled Tribbi until we got to an area where there are sidewalks.

Right now, we are transitioning from Tribs taking my lead and following me when I start walking to her taking the first step and leaning into the harness when I say "Tribbi, Forward!" I have taught Tribbi collar pressure, which simply means that if I put gentle pressure on her collar in any direction, she knows to take one step to alleviate that pressure. So as I am teaching "forward", I am just gently putting pressure on the back of her neck, because that tells her to take a step forward. I heap on the praise as soon as she takes that first step, and we are off!

Pace is how quickly the dog walks, and pull is how hard the dog leans into the harness. I like a pretty brisk pace and a medium pull. Right now, on her own, Tribbi is offering my ideal pace and pull. It is very likely that as we progress through training, she will increase her pull, and I will have to work to reduce it back where I want it, so I am heavily rewarding her for giving me exactly what I want right now. The moment she pulls too hard, if she does, I will drop the harness handle, call her back into heel position and try again.

So anyways, we did 4 street crossings today. She did quite well. A couple of times, she stopped a little prematurely, so I dropped the harness and showed her what I wanted from her. Each guiding behavior can be taught in a 3-step process known as show, teach, test or stt. In the case of the down curbs into the street, I dropped the harness handle, showed her what I wanted by heeling her up to the curb, praising her, and offering a food reward. I then backed up, picked up the harness handle again, gave her the forward command and coached her through stopping in the correct location, and then we entered the road and completed the crossing. WE will not test anything for at least a few weeks. She's a young girl, and she is just learning right now. I want it to be a very low-pressure game for her right now.

On our walk, we made 3 right turns. From the time Tribbi was a young puppy, we have been working on pivots, so when I asked for a "right" she popped right into position like she had been guiding me around turns all of her life. Overall, this was an incredible second workout.

Tribbi is learning how far over she needs to walk from the grass line on my right. If my foot went into the grass at all, I just stomped/scuffed my right foot and encouraged her slightly over to the left. I gave her dones of praise as soon as she moved over. Tribs is a bit of a busy body, so she was a little bit nosey about what was going on around us. I was able to get her on track with a soft "uh uh". Again, that is how I have regained her focus since she was a young puppy, so it was a very familiar behavior and expectation for her.

I am blown away by our first long walk together, and I am very proud of her. I'll be back with more trips with Tribs soon!

01/03/2024

January 2, 2024 was the first time I asked Tribbi to guide me in harness. I selected a long, quiet, clear stretch of sidewalk. The starting point for harness training is critical. It is important to choose an area in which you can be reasonably confident that you and your dog are safe. In this video, I am holding my cane in my right hand, because I still want to keep track of the grass line to my right. Tribbi has never guided me before, and it would be easy for her to step too far right and for me to roll my ancle into the grass line. Some dogs require a lot more coaching and support to get moving into the harness. I have intentionally been letting Tribbi walk slightly ahead of me on my left side in guiding position as she has grown up. As a result, guide position came naturally to her, and with some encouragement, she stepped out and leaned into the harness. I am so proud of my girl. This was an incredible first walk. It was dark out, so I couldn't see the line of the sidewalk at all. I just felt how she moved and followed her, and I swear Zesti stopped by on her way to the Rainbow Bridge to upload her "How to Guide Dog for Beginners" handbook to Tribbi's brain. I felt like Zesti was right there trotting alongside Tribbi and encouraging her to keep it on the straight and narrow. I am very anxious to see what this little girl is made of, and I am going to push myself very hard to keep you all posted.

VD: A shot from behind of Meghan and Tribbi walking down the sidewalk. You can hear Meghan enthusiastically praising Tribbi, and Tribs gives some small tail wags in acknowledgement of said praise.

01/03/2024

I've never gotten this on video with any of my dogs before, but I feel like I need to hold onto every little detail this time. In this video, I take off Tribbi's "Guide Dog Inn Training" vest and put her harness on for the first time. We were all a little bit cold, but I love that she poked her head into the harness. I used a food lure to get her to cooperate so readily, and I will continue to do so for the first handful of training sessions to make sure she views gearing up as a positive thing. I had to make the harness a little bit bigger before we could get to work, because 8-month-old Tribbi is a little bit more bulky than 17-month-old Zesti was. From now on, I will probably always have Tribbi wear her harness. I will not ask her to guide in most environments yet, but I want her to get used to her gear, and I want that harness available for any time we are in a situation where it is appropriate to ask her to guide.

01/03/2024

Hello dear readers. I've been absent for a long time, and a lot has happened. ON July 23, 2023, I brought home Zesti's half sister Tribbi. A lot of me was not ready, but I also knew I would benefit from the distraction of a young puppy who needed my attention and care. I named her Tribbi, short for Tribute, because she was gifted to me by her and Zesti's breeder. The night I met my Tribs, there was one lone star in the sky for about 10 minutes. I think that was my Zesti taking a few minutes to make sure we were going to be okay. Z has walked beside us on many walks. I am certain I have felt the thump of her tail on my leg as Tribbi and I retraced the paths that Zesti and I frequented throughout my neighborhood.

When Tribbi came home, I was too broken to even consider sharing her raising and training on this page. It was all too raw, and I was so so weary.
Zesti and Tribbi are two very different girls with the same velvet-soft ears with that delicate fold down the center. Part of why I picked Tribbi is because her ears were so familiar. Silly I know, but I cannot look at photos and I wanted to have something about her that reminded me of my Z. I of course looked at many other factors, but those ears pulled me in. Tribbi has been to many musicals, stayed at a hotel with me for a weekend, frequented buses, Ubers, and the cars of many friends and family. She rested at my feet during Christmas with my family, and I made an oath to myself and to her at that time that I will do all in my power to make sure she is the one resting at my feet next Christmas, too. Zesti was just entering into that point where she was doing annual things with me for a second time. I miss her so terribly, and my grief over her loss has gotten in my way while raising Tribs many times, but I am still so proud of the work I have put into this lovely little girl.
I wanted to share Zesti's harness training on this page, but that didn't happen, because life got busy, I got long Covid which has left me with debatable energy levels, and there was so much going on that I just didn't have the faculties to document her formal training.
Alas, life knocked me on my rear end. Four days after Zesti passed, I was let go from my job. I chose to use that tragic time as an opportunity to pivot my expectations for the rest of my life. It's always been my dream to not be tied to a desk job, so I am embarking on all of my dreams. I am focusing my time on my breeding program, training of dogs for others, and I am in the process of getting my service dog equipment business up and running. I am no longer working 40 hours a week, so I will have the time to put into documenting Tribbi's formal guide dog education.
To be honest, I really need the support this time around. Every step I take with Tribbi in harness sort of makes me feel like I am taking that step away from Zesti. It isn't rational, but when has grief ever been rational? So anyways, excuse this somewhat disjointed post. My next update will talk about Tribbi's first time in harness.

07/18/2023

My sweet perfect girl's life was cut far too short this weekend. Her story is in the link below. Thank you for reading, and thank you for keeping me in your thoughts and prayers. Zesti was such a treasure, and I dread knowing every day will be without her.

Hi, my name is Beth, and I am fundraising for my dear friend Meghan and her amazing… Beth Kwakenat needs your support for Please help Zesti get her zing back

04/26/2023

Forgive my very extensive absence. I have been busier than I like, but I have loved almost every minute of it. Since last I wrote, Zesti has continued to grow into a delightful young lady. She got roasted lamb for her birthday, has flown to Minneapolis and Washington DC with me, and has become a companion I cannot imagine life without anymore. She has started on harness training, and she knows the basics at this point. I am waiting for her to mature more before I do the higher-pressure training. Here is a photo Leah took of us a couple of weeks ago. She is in her guide harness, and we are snuggled together on the same bench we took a baby photo on last spring.

09/14/2022

Zesti went to the dentist with me on Monday, and she was very well-behaved. She didn't sleep, but she only tried to get up once. Blind lady pointy clicky managed to capture this pretty picture of her. What a darling girl she is, and so pretty, too.

09/07/2022

After about 5 hours at the festival, Zesti was pretty tuckered out. Look how tiny she can still make herself! Radar enjoyed the break on my lap, too.

09/07/2022

Here is another photo from the festival last weekend. One of my good friends broke her foot, and we had a blast with my blind driving skills.
Sara: Left...more left....Hello!!!??? Left!!
Meghan: Oh, woops sorry, you sound a little alarmed!

Neither any Meghans nor any Sarahs were damaged, and we had a blast. Zesti did a great job heeling alongside Sarah's wheelchair, and she has been to enough festivals and stuff now that I knew nothing about that would phase her. She is becoming a part of me, and her companionship is effortless. I cannot wait for the day when she is guiding me. What a lovely adaptable little girl.