22/08/2023
Being corrected sure is hard - but if we never get corrected we never improve, and we keep doing the same (usually) dumb stuff and hinder our horses.
I know i'm at best an average rider - I have a tattoo of my heart horse Irish bucking on my ankle, because of the dumb thing I used to do (micro-managing him), which got me bucked off. I have no doubt I do something else now that could be improved, and I look forward to being corrected.
Be humble. Seek constant betterment, let yourself BE bettered. Remember, it's about the horse.
If weβre coming at our riding and general horsemanship in a healthy way, weβre wanting always to do better. This means improving ourselves while vowing to do less and less (ideally, NO) harm to the horse. This doesnβt necessarily mean being recognized by other horse(wo)men.
This sounds good, until it is time to do the actual learning. I think it was Winston Churchill who first wittily said, βI love the idea of learning; I just hate the being taught!β
What does being a good student really mean?
Becoming βteachableβ is a thing, all right. As a riding instructor, as well as an occasional participant in group lessons, it always surprises me the number of grown people who pay good money for instruction, all the while repelling it like water from a duckβs back.
A surprisingly large number of us will take an affirmation from a knowledgeable coach along with a heapinβ helpinβ of self-aggrandizement. Weβll be told that we are doing something well and weβll answer with how long weβve been riding, or the latest buckle or show classes weβve won. Point out an area needing some improvement and weβll take it as a personal affront. We will literally stop and argue why the teacher or clinician is wrong, or why we persist in doing things βour wayβ.
Iβve decided that the true measure of our willingness to improve is not in how we handle compliments and encouragement, the βpositiveβ thingsβ¦ but in how we handle the more βnegativeβ aspects of learning, such as being corrected, or having to go back to the drawing board. It takes a particularly strong character to be told that what sheβs been doing for thirty years can be done better, if only she will let go of her past and get to work on learning something new!
Perhaps it is not the learning that is the challenge, but all the un-learning this entails. There is an art in letting go what we have loved, especially our own beliefs.
So often, weβll take correction as an insult or outrage. Weβll say that the coach who doesnβt make us feel like a winner is somehow an abusive, or toxic, teacher. This mindset has a huge impact on our own improvement in the saddle and on the ground, as well as how we accept instruction and assimilating new information, in general.
Iβve audited many public clinics, for I wonβt ride with someone until Iβve observed his, or her, angle when it comes to teaching horsemanship. Iβve seen riders struggle with taking instruction and I rather suspect they were hoping to pay their tuition, only to be told that they are doing everything right, already. Or that their horse is superb, as is. I know this is one of my fondest fantasies, to be told that there is literally nothing else I can improve upon, though I share this with you in jest. Well, partly. Sort of.
Oh, itβs a humbling thing, to consider that we are likely just average riders, on so-called average horses, lacking any real jaw-dropping talents, between us. This is hard because the stars, those few extraordinary individuals, earn so much recognition for their toil! The rest of us are therefore called to muddle along, doing our best with that which God gave us.
There are worse things, than doing our best at learning how to learn.
I think if I could give any one of us some useful encouragement, it would be this. Stop trying to be extraordinary! Aim to be kind and open to learning about what really matters in horsemanship: staying safe; learning to βreadβ our horses; enjoying their gifts to the fullest without causing pain or suffering; striving for health and joyfully cheering one another on.
Who knows? You or I may be one of the gifted ones and if so, weβll have also learned to be a nice person in the process.
Some of the most achieving horse(wo)men are the hardest people to be around. Can you or I be both? Maybe. Maybe not. To our horses and our own families, I daresay being decentβlosing our self-pity and self-centredness, ditching the striving riderβs endless drive to be recognizedβprobably matters more.
Shown here, me and the Hanoverian, Cypress, on his seventh-ever ride. No hard rockinβ Reels, no slow-motion action. Nope, weβre just toolinβ aroundβ¦