03/05/2023
Today our breed expert Carol Price looks at how important it can be to stay with a dog in their final moments, and we welcome other followers' views on this:
BEING THERE TO SAY GOODBYE
Recently I was reading a really sad feature about how upsetting it is for vets when owners bring their dogs to them to be put to sleep, then refuse to stay with them while they leave this world. How the dogs’ last moments are so often spent looking longingly for the owners who have abandoned them at this critical and final moment, and how much this can haunt vets afterwards, or linger in their memories as a more heart-breaking act of betrayal.
And while people’s views may differ greatly on this, to me there really is no greater test of the love you have for your dog than to be there for him, or her, right to the end, no matter how hard it is, or what pain you feel inside. You have made the decision to take on the agonising grief of losing a dog so that they, in turn, may suffer no more. There are few acts more selfless than this, or so demanding of a level of courage in yourself you have to find to see it through. But what I have found is that out of the truly purest and deepest love you have for another being, so often also comes the greatest courage to do what is ultimately the most right thing for them. Regardless of the pain that you know will come later.
MAKING THE DECISION
As humans, we are so often put in the unique position of having to decide when and how our dogs will leave this earth. The majority of decisions like these are clearly made through kindness, compassion and a need to spare further suffering. But they are also very, very hard. And it could well be that just the very act of having to decide to end a dog’s life takes everything out of some people, both emotionally and psychologically, to the point where actually having to witness the real life consequences of their decision genuinely is beyond their ability to bear.
You cannot make people bear what they are unable to bear, or even feel what they are unable to feel, but you can sometimes wonder, later, if they ever regret not being with their dog when they passed away. For it is a moment they will never be able to relive, or get back again.
BEING THERE
For a large number of owners, being there when their dog dies is incredibly important. As well as a way in which you can far better process any grief that later follows; knowing that you were there with them to the very end. So when there are circumstances in which dogs – often unexpectedly, or via some tragic accident – die more suddenly without their owners being present, it can be so much harder for the owners in question to bear or later deal with.
From personal experience I know that saying a final goodbye to a beloved dog really can be one of the hardest and most painful experiences in life, and never do you ever forget their final moments each time. It stays with you forever. But what I also know, more realistically, is that life is finite for dogs, as it is for people. And if or when they have to go, I do not want them to leave this earth feeling in any way fearful or bewildered. I always want their last moments to be spent in the presence of the person who they loved and trusted the most, and who most loved them in return. You will only have this final moment once. And you owe it to them to get it right.
All text © Carol Price 2023
